I'm in love with my student, what should I do?

[WaltHitman]

All of your advice to tell him to leave the kid are bullshit. Don't get me wrong, I am a professional who work in the industry as well so I understand how things go.

However, most of you here are too stuck up in what society decide about " wrong" or "Right".
Does anyone still believe in true love and love conquer conquer everything?
I do. Just go with your heart Alex

I think that right there is about the WORST advice I have ever seen on this board. You just told a man suffering enough to go ahead and act on impulse and make it REALLY BAD.
Not to mention that you just told him to do something that could more likely than not get him put in prison for a long time and publicly said break the binding and fearsome child protection laws of his country, where you won't be able to help either one of them a bit should he take your disastrous advice and get really, really hurt.
I think it's pretty crummy to use this person's LIFE as your flippant statement about "love" when you don't stand to lose a thing no matter WHAT happens to either one of them. ?

[posterpicture]

I think that right there is about the WORST advice I have ever seen on this board. You just told a man suffering enough to go ahead and act on impulse and make it REALLY BAD.
Not to mention that you just told him to do something that could more likely than not get him put in prison for a long time and publicly said break the binding and fearsome child protection laws of his country, where you won't be able to help either one of them a bit should he take your disastrous advice and get really, really hurt.
I think it's pretty crummy to use this person's LIFE as your flippant statement about "love" when you don't stand to lose a thing no matter WHAT happens to either one of them. ?

You think like someone from the US where laws are all bullshit and people care pretty much just for themselves before love or anything else.
The guy said he won't have sex with the kid and he is no longer a teacher of the kid. What is wrong there with them start dating? I don't think UK government will imprison you for hanging out with younger people. It 's not the United States of America after all lol.

[Corsac]

All of your advice to tell him to leave the kid are bullshit. Don't get me wrong, I am a professional who work in the industry as well so I understand how things go.

However, most of you here are too stuck up in what society decide about " wrong" or "Right".
Does anyone still believe in true love and love conquer conquer everything?
I do. Just go with your heart Alex

I know some people were incredibly harsh towards the guy on here, but you're no better then them by stating that they must be stuck up in what society decides is right or wrong. Several people actually tried to be constructive on the matter to ensure that the OP wouldn't do anything that could potentially land him in huge trouble, both socially and legally.

[Pix]

The guy said he won't have sex with the kid and he is no longer a teacher of the kid. What is wrong there with them start dating?

And nothing will come of it, like I believe that.




Though I will say I don't believe it's love, I believe it's hormones...with an attraction that will fade in a few months and probably sweeter if nothing comes of it than if they shag and/or things go bad (9 times out of 10 the fantasy is sweeter than the reality). In any case Alexander comes off as more infatuated to me than in love.

And I'm also not certain the boy wants him as bad as the guy says....LOTS of men (and at least a few women) project their desire into someone they like believing the feelings automatically reciprocated (this being a primary motivation of many stalkers, btw). At an extreme case was a guy I met who believed all 10-year-olds were trying to seduce him (not females of any other age, however), and as far as I could tell he only thought that because he was attracted to them and thus believed the little girls knew he was turned on and thus doing it on purpose (and it didn't surprise me to find him a registered child molester later). This last Halloween I did NOT want a man's attention, I ignored him for several minutes before politely telling him that was enough and he acted like I was stuck up and had led him on when I did NOTHING that I can think of to make him think I wanted him, but he was sure I was toying with him and enjoying his attention until I told him to stop. A great many men have an amazing ability to think those they like want them and I can't help but wonder if Alexander is another one.

[posterpicture]

And nothing will come of it, like I believe that.




Though I will say I don't believe it's love, I believe it's hormones...with an attraction that will fade in a few months and probably sweeter if nothing comes of it than if they shag and/or things go bad (9 times out of 10 the fantasy is sweeter than the reality). In any case Alexander comes off as more infatuated to me than in love.
.

I had my first love when I was 16 in a kinda same situation. We didn't touch or even see each other really often and no longer together. But even now, I can still say that I love him. It' s not all about the hormones, you can't use science, reason or logic to explain love ( and I am a professional who work in a high tech industry, I do believe in science ).

I feel like too much judgements are going on here. You know what conservative anti-gay people said about us, the gays?

"It 's not love, it 's just lust and hormones".

[Pix]

Was he as giddy, angst-driven and obsessed as a school boy like Alexander?

And why even date? There are other ways to interact with people one loves. I get together with people, including kids, I love all the time, but I don't date them.

[djharris79]

You can't control who you fall in love with, but you can control your actions. He is a 15 year old kid and you are an adult. I would advice you to not do anything regardless if he likes you or not. Be a teacher to your student, and don't let your emotions get you in trouble. Until he is an adult you can't really do anything.

[ManicReptile21]

You need o maintain your position of power. if your the teacher- teach the boy that he shouldn't fall in love with his teachers and teach yourself not to fall in love with a child who is not of age. It is illegal and would ruin your rep.; dont even think about it. Lay down the law and find yourself a good man your age who will treat you right. not some child who's sexually charged and only in it because he thinks your attractive. Tell him to go back to his pornos and childish behavior and let him learn about love the way everyone else has to learn. The excruciatingly hard way- through truth.

[Mike]

I'm 24 years old and originally I'm from Russia. My mother married an englishman, so I had to move to England at the age of sixteen, which was obviously not the best thing for a teenager. I struggled to fit in for a while..............

Wow, this is a tough one!

Listen, I don't think you should be ashamed, as you have done nothing about it. I also think the law had to set an arbitrary age of consent, but people get emotionally (and sexually) mature at different ages.

DO NOT act out on it, my friend. You do not want to lose your life over it. You could lose your job and NO explaining would get you out of it as nothing less than a pedophile, even though I do NOT believe you are one.
In the eyes of the law, you'd be committing a horrible crime, and just for that, I think you should do everything in your power to get this boy out of your mind.

You should go out more and seek the company of other, older men (18+), you should even consider leaving this school, if you can't control yourself.
I believe you're really talking about love, rather than just lust, my friend, but this world has rules. They're meant for bad people, which you obviously are NOT, but good-luck convincing them of that, if push comes to shove.

I know 3 years seem like a long time, my friend, but if this thing is really real, you'll be together even when that time has passed. Look him up, when he is 18, man, do NOT ruin your life!

<3

[Counselor]

Step away from the horse!