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I am confused again
#61
Counselor Wrote:So it isn't intended to be used as a catch-all title for "potentially available", then.

I Don't use it that way, instead of feeling attraction to one gender over another I feel attraction to both equally, I know no better way of saying that.
I don't expect straight people or gay people to fully understand, I have difficulty understanding how somebody cannot be attracted to both.
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#62
hank Wrote:I Don't use it that way, instead of feeling attraction to one gender over another I feel attraction to both equally, I know no better way of saying that.
I don't expect straight people or gay people to fully understand, I have difficulty understanding how somebody cannot be attracted to both.


i have difficulty understanding how someone cannot be attracted to women . so i understand that ~

particularly ... jessica alba in sin city . how anyone can watch that and NOT be turned on .. i will never ever understand . hahah


i do understand bisexuality , though . i know that it's not about wanting everyone . it's about being capable of falling in love/lust with someone no matter what their gender is . it doesn't make you more or less likely to cheat or want relationships with multiple people .

biphobia seems to be a bit of an issue with a lot of gay people , though ... just from what i've seen in my life ...
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#63
Oh, I'm not afraid of them, some of the coolest people I've known are bi. I just didn't understand that the term is a legitimate part of the spectrum, not just a transition/cover for unsure/uncomfortable gays and lesbians.

I AM MUCH MORE INFORMED THAN BEFORE I CAME HERE
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#64
megumidesu Wrote:i have difficulty understanding how someone cannot be attracted to women . so i understand that ~

particularly ... jessica alba in sin city . how anyone can watch that and NOT be turned on .. i will never ever understand . hahah


i do understand bisexuality , though . i know that it's not about wanting everyone . it's about being capable of falling in love/lust with someone no matter what their gender is . it doesn't make you more or less likely to cheat or want relationships with multiple people .

biphobia seems to be a bit of an issue with a lot of gay people , though ... just from what i've seen in my life ...

The thing I don't really understand is the handful of guys I have dated say they want a manly guy, they typically aren't but that really doesn't bother me a whole lot. Bi men are an untapped recourse for the guys that want manly men, as has been the standard of bisexual men I have met.all be it that is two aside from myself but either way, why would sexuality stop somebody, certainly wouldn't stop me.
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#65
Counselor Wrote:Oh, I'm not afraid of them, some of the coolest people I've known are bi. I just didn't understand that the term is a legitimate part of the spectrum, not just a transition/cover for unsure/uncomfortable gays and lesbians.

I AM MUCH MORE INFORMED THAN BEFORE I CAME HERE

I am glad you came here with an open mind, its good to know that people are capable of understanding.

Really all I want is understanding.
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#66
Counselor Wrote:So it isn't intended to be used as a catch-all title for "potentially available", then.
That's right. I don't advertise that I am bisexual in order to hook up with anything on two legs. I am bisexual and in a relationship with a boyfriend.
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#67
MikeMG Wrote:It’s this kind of playing both sides of the field when convenient that gay men don’t like. Since you don’t identify as gay, you don’t feel compelled to be part of the gay culture. You love the benefits of being with gay men and all the acceptance we have fought for, but when push comes to shove, always turn around and say “oh I’m really not part of that because I am not gay. “
Thank you, Mike, your post was very helpful for me in understanding the resentment that some gay men feel towards bisexual men.

At the same time, I resent the generalization you are making based on some bi men you have known. You are right: I don't feel compelled to be part of the gay culture. But I have stuck my neck out in defense of gay friends, gay rights, and sexual tolerance when it was not convenient.

I am not gay! I am not straight! Do you think that's easy?! I have struggled with my attraction to both men and women, and when I finally feel ok about expressing myself fully I discover that a large percentage of gay men have an irrational hostility towards my sexual alignment.

I get that you think bisexuals benefit from hanging out with the gays when it's fun and sheltering with the straights when it's not. I'm sure some people do that. I want you to hear that it is also possible to be bisexual with integrity.

I am surprised and fascinated by this thread. I have never felt so much a member of a discriminated minority as I do today.
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#68
Careful, Geminize, there are some generalizations about gay men as well in that post.

Edit: thank you, all the bi members that have spoken in this thread, I have learned much of what I had misconceived.
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#69
Counselor Wrote:Careful, Geminize, there are some generalizations about gay men as well in that post.

Edit: thank you, all the bi members that have spoken in this thread, I have learned much of what I had misconceived.

Thanks for making the effort, I think bisexuals are a tiny minority compared to monosexuals, and that being said most people just don't think about them.

All I really think that gives a bisexual person a hard time is that it just isn't fully understood.

That too if you saw a guy kissing a lady you would think they were both straight, obviously, they both could be bi, if you saw them kissing their genders you would think they AR gay, bi would never cross your mind.

I am not a both at once kind of guy.
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#70
hank Wrote:I guess gay men and straight women that have issues with it are not worth dating.

your last sentence pretty much summed it up.
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