Mike Wrote:Listen, I think guys are put off by bisexuals, because they're afraid they might suddenly decide to "turn themselves out" and be with girls.
I think you should think and come to a conclusion - are you more into guys, or girls?
If the answer is "guys", I believe those guys who are put off by your being bisexual, would feel better, if you let them know you're more into guys, than girls (which is usually the case with bisexuals).
I hope I have helped.
:-)
I am not into one over the other though, genitals really don't come into play when I am dating somebody. I understand that a lot of gay men think they are or say they are bisexual for the ease of "operating under the radar of hate". I certainly don't blame them for that, it is an intimidating world. But honestly people don't go from saying or thinking they are gay to thinking they are bi so this point is lost on me.
But even if I am in a gay or straight relationship I will still be bisexual, I can't turn it off. I can understand how that can cause a gay guy or a straight woman to feel insecure. But I am fighting my own insecurities, that seem very complex, not only do I worry weather I am good enough or all the necessary issues but is this person going to think I am disgusting or a promiscuious person or if I like the other gender more. there are vast difficulties that I don't think you see. I honestly don't think you have had.
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hank Wrote:But even if I am in a gay or straight relationship I will still be bisexual, I can't turn it off. I can understand how that can cause a gay guy or a straight woman to feel insecure. But I am fighting my own insecurities, that seem very complex, not only do I worry weather I am good enough or all the necessary issues but is this person going to think I am disgusting or a promiscuious person or if I like the other gender more. there are vast difficulties that I don't think you see. I honestly don't think you have had.
As far as I know, when someone tells me they are bisexual, I think oh, unusual, didn't know that, not disgusting or promiscuous. If anything, gay men have the promiscuous reputation. It sounds like you are projecting your own fears onto people you dont even know. How many people have you told in person about your sexuality have turned around and made remarks about being disgusting? .....Parents don't count.
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I live in a big city with lots of gay clubs. You know, now that I think of it, there was actually one club out of all of them off by its own that catered exclusively to bisexuals. So walking in it was hard to tell because it had both men and women who look more straight in their appearance mixed with with a few gay people as well. I dont know if that was fluk or if there are more around but something to think about.
I dont know where you live, but chances are, if you dig real hard, you might find some place similar to meat people you can relate to. I am guessing you might skip the gay guides.
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hank Wrote:I am not into one over the other though, genitals really don't come into play when I am dating somebody. I understand that a lot of gay men think they are or say they are bisexual for the ease of "operating under the radar of hate". I certainly don't blame them for that, it is an intimidating world. But honestly people don't go from saying or thinking they are gay to thinking they are bi so this point is lost on me.
But even if I am in a gay or straight relationship I will still be bisexual, I can't turn it off. I can understand how that can cause a gay guy or a straight woman to feel insecure. But I am fighting my own insecurities, that seem very complex, not only do I worry weather I am good enough or all the necessary issues but is this person going to think I am disgusting or a promiscuious person or if I like the other gender more. there are vast difficulties that I don't think you see. I honestly don't think you have had.
Well, if that's the case, you need to find someone who will accept you for who and what you are.
One question - do you think, if you were with one gender, you'd miss and long for being with the other?
Is it something that's going to weigh on you?
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Mike, I honestly don't know. I don't think I would need two lovers but i would still look.
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I can't get it to let me post something
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MikeMG Wrote:As far as I know, when someone tells me they are bisexual, I think oh, unusual, didn't know that, not disgusting or promiscuous. If anything, gay men have the promiscuous reputation. It sounds like you are projecting your own fears onto people you dont even know. How many people have you told in person about your sexuality have turned around and made remarks about being disgusting? .....Parents don't count.
I have been told by people either directly or indirectly in person that bisexual men are gross, or liars, stingy, perverted. I had one lady i took on a date call me a faggot at the top of her voice
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hank Wrote:I have been told by people either directly or indirectly in person that bisexual men are gross, or liars, stingy, perverted. I had one lady i took on a date call me a faggot at the top of her voice
Ask yourself - would you really want to date / be in a relationship with someone who responds like that? It's better to go ahead and tell the truth, than to find out you've been seeing one of the scums of the earth a year+ later.
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I think IMHO the Kinsey scale still makes sense, still, 64 years after it was published.
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[I][I]"Males do not represent two discrete populations, heterosexual and homosexual. The world is not to be divided into sheep and goats. It is a fundamental of taxonomy that nature rarely deals with discrete categories... The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects.
While emphasizing the continuity of the gradations between exclusively heterosexual and exclusively homosexual histories, it has seemed desirable to develop some sort of classification which could be based on the relative amounts of heterosexual and homosexual experience or response in each history [...] An individual may be assigned a position on this scale, for each period in his life. [...] A seven-point scale comes nearer to showing the many gradations that actually exist.
—Kinsey, 1948, introducing the scale
[/I][/I]
His theory was that very few people are either a 1 or a 6 on the scale; the vast majority of the population falls somewhere in between.
0 Exclusively heterosexual
1 Predominantly heterosexual, only incidentally homosexual
2 Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual
3 Equally heterosexual and homosexual
4 Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual
5 Predominantly homosexual, only incidentally heterosexual
6 Exclusively homosexual
X Non-sexual[2][3]
I would consider myself a 5. Does that make me bisexual or gay? I don't really care what label is on it. I know what I like.
I don't really think that a bi guy would be any more likely to cheat on me than a gay guy. Guys in general have to decide if their intellect or their dick is going to rule their bodies. And more than one of us shifts our brains southward after a few drinks.
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meant to say either a 0 or a 6 on the scale, sorry
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