Found out my partner was/is a escort please help

[Vibes]

Moving forward is the only way to go.

[pellaz]

Just a guess but if he has not lost his 12year long employ things would have gone on in your relationship. I feel his situation is more a financial one.

Sounds like you might be the type have issues letting go. Let go, don't tell on him, don't talk to his family.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

He is doing it to keep food on the table, roof over the head - this isn't the same as him cheating on you.

And I do not see why he must tell you the whole sordid details of the past, he is most likely embarrassed by it as it is, and having to confide every bit of it, when he most likely has the intention of not doing it again has got be hard.

Its not like he knew back then he would have a relationship with you and thus knew he would be judged for that part of his life.

I sold street drugs in my youth, I'm not proud of that fact, I did it to survive (and to supply my own habit). If push comes to shove I can easily go back into the dealing of drugs. While I am doing everything currently in my power to keep from having to rely on dealing to keep a roof over the head, food on the table, etc... I am a realist and know that when push comes to shove and all other options pan out, I still have that option.

No you shouldn't tell anyone. That is between him and them, not you and them to talk about him behind his back.

He is ashamed - get that through your head now - thus he has carefully hid that part of his life from everyone. he did what he felt was the logical choice to keep roof over the head, clothes on back and all of those sorts of things.

Until he got that job 12 years ago... now that job is going away of course he is going to fall to his skill set - we all do. Its just that not all of us have 'decent' skill sets and some of us know how to survive this nightmare economy doing things less savory. But that is why we are survivors instead of road kill on life's road.

[Person66]

This is a complicated situation tangled with financial matters.
You should definately not "report" him to anyone. Escorting/prostitution should be a personal choice, it it not up to you to decide that it's "morally wrong" and alert the authorities.

You need to let go.
He is not the right person for you

I wish you the best of luck.

[Nick9]

it it not up to you to decide that it's "morally wrong" and alert the authorities.

Exactly. You want to hurt his mother and to punish him and you mask it by saying you would be doing it for his own good. He is adult. He has no addiction so he is capable of doing his own decisions.

You may not be ok with his choices, but as I understand it he is your ex now. Let go and let him live the life he wants to live.

[Pix]

I agree with everyone else: let go, don't hurt his mother by reporting him (which just isn't going to be helpful anyway), and move on. It'll take time to move on of course but the less you have to do with him and his life now, the faster it will be to move on.

[SolemnBoy]

Well, you definitely shouldn't report him. I understand that his choice of profession is hard to swallow but it's a decision he made and it's neither morally wrong nor something to be ashamed of.

However, since you do seem to have a problem with that (which is understandable) I kind of feel like the best solution would be like the others said: letting him go.

Regardless of how you choose to deal with things, I wish you good luck!

[writerken]

So he gave you his laptop to clean out and you had a look what was on it. Trust was that.

[RockerBlocks]

It would be kind of humiliating to report this to anyone wouldn't it?

He's reputation would be ruined for making money. You would ruin he's life basically.

Just let it be.

[Corsac]

If you weren't judging his past then you wouldn't even have thought of the option to report him, you'll add to the struggle that he's already having by reporting him too. His mum won't want to hear that her son has been escorting so don't even consider that either, no parent would want to hear it.

I understand you don't like what you're seeing but its not up to you to decide what he should and shouldn't do with his body/life. If he is continuing with the escorting and you don't like it then the best bet is to just let it slide and move on with your life, checking his emails and hurting yourself even more over it won't help you or him in the long run.