Give Bad Advice

[bakalove]

Switch to menthol


I need help picking up a sheet of paper whats the easiest way to do it?

[Lilitu]

Hire a team of Koreans.

I want to get a haircut.

[monk]

Go to Sweeney Todd's.

I'm really fed up - what should I do?

[Counselor]

Sit in a chair with your arms crossed until somebody notices. When they ask what's wrong, reply with, "NOTHING!" and stick your tongue out at them.

I scrubbed the toilet bowl, and now I'm worried it's too clean.

[bakalove]

If its to clean burn it with fire and get a new one if thats ends up being to clean buy a outhouse

what's the best way to skydive without a parachute?

[Blue]

From fighter jet that will target you with it's missiles.

How do I get my ISP (internet service provider) to lower my bill?

[ChrisD]

try billing them and see how they like it.

How can I free myself from a caffeine addiction?

[Counselor]

Build up an immunity by drinking increasing amounts of caffeine.

How can I clear out my nostrils? I'm brewing a veritable gold mine...

[Lilitu]

as with most things, fire is the answer.

How should I go about getting a weekend job?

[Rainbowmum]

Contact the nearest escort agency.

How can I lead a horse to water and make them drink it?