I don't understand the "stuff in common" problem people mention. Of course the person you are with is going to be different, but what is important is how you interact, deal with the differences and expand yourself with your SO.
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I have to agree with the other posters, that a great deal of partners in relationships have different interest. You note that you love him for his good qualities, the ones from the heart. I think heart qualities trump the ones you have listed anytime.
It comes down to what your expectation of relationship compatibility is.
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All Good Advice. What can I add? Not much. But oe thing we did as we learned that we are two very distinct individuals was that from the beginning I had my space and he has his. Separate bedrooms. I am a book worm, he, a movie/music person. I have a Volvo, He has a Lincoln. We are vastly different but been together since 1972. This is where it gets complicated... sometimes he comes to my room, sometimes I go to his, IMPULSE drives our realtionship and quite frankly the sex is just as strong as it was in 1972. More often than not one of us will say, "wanna get something to eat?" or, "what are you watching/reading?" and the evening begins and is rarely the same. It has worked for us. But if you ask either of us what we do not like about each other you will get a blank stare (It has happened). Dwell on the likes and learn to ignore the dislikes.
I noticed you had a list of things you do not like...did you also make a list of the LIKES? Where is it? Share it?
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I agree with Jim, here... The personal space... really important for two men, I believe. More so than in a hetero couple, probably, although women who know how to honour personal space probably get more out of their significant others (husbands)...
So SHARE the LIKES!
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You will be hard pressed to find anything my husband and i have in common.
We are two individuals that are very different from each other , it has always been like that with us.
yet our love for each other has strengthened during the years.
You can still be in love without having everything in common.
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My wife and i are polar opposites in our likes and dislikes. and personalities. I'm a cynical asshole. She's like sunshine and rainbow's. But she makes my life interesting, and I love her more then life. So if you are in love.....work with it.
Mick
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I would say throw the list away and write a new one - what you like to do together and what you like him for.
Then you will see if the relationship is something worth fighting for.
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Guys! Thank you so much for your advices! It help me a lot!
The reason why I wrote this is because I don't have many friends to talk about this situation. It wasn't my intention to make it feel like I was complaining about him, just to learn how to deal it and I realize with all your messages that no matter these differences, what it really matters is the love we feel in our hearts, pure love, truly love and sincere.
About him, wow, he is a great guy, and here is the list:
I love him cause: He is a great son, a great brother, uncle, cousin, an excellent worker, oh his kisses! He is honest, he is funny, he is sympathetic, a great dancer! He is my lover too!
a great friend! He is smart! (I love how smart he was and is) I love his old pictures when he was a kid! (ohhh his pretty face!) I love his perfect eyes (I call him "ojito bolita") I love how he sleep, his warm body, his hands! his hairy arms! His words telling me that I am the man of his life (and he is mine too) He is always looking after me, when I'm sad, when I'm with flu, or something else. He cooks for me (even he do it just one time but it was delicious!) I love when he sings to me! (even he doesn't sing well hehe) I love his words, his messages during the day. Oh god! Should I continue? haha
I just love him! And if create this thread is because I needed advices. Thank you for your support, thank you for help me to see that I was overreacting and with doubts. Have to say also that this is my first relationship, the two before it wasn't... this is the one and only...
ManReg
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Muchas gracias, cariño, y ahora vete decirselo.
Thanks very much, sweetie, and now go and tell him all that. :biggrin:
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Dealing with...
