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Dealing with a vindictive drama queen
#1
So, this is my first post here, so please be kind Big Grin I'm 50, came out as bisexual last October, and separated from my wife of 21 years. Have my own apartment which is becoming a reform school almost.

So, where to start... My ex-roommate's ex-boyfriend (C 23) and I became casual friends, since around the beginning of February. Mostly a texting relationship, we had dinner once to talk about his ex-roommate (before I made him my ex-roommate.) So, we banter back and forth, mainly him wanting to be a porn star, all his anxiety, his self-confidence, self-image, and wanting help ($$$.)

So, one day I needed a ride from a downtown bar to home. I texted him, and he agreed to come get me. We talked a little after that, and he went home. Don't think nothing of it.

So, Monday, he hits me up asking if he and a friend of his (H 19) can come over. Sure, no problem, C wants me to photograph him and H fucking. Not really my thing, but I was tired of being alone. C had only met H a few days before, but C was just head over heels "in love" with him.

So, we smoke a little weed, drink a bit of vodka, and things get interesting. H has no problem stripping his bottom off to put a jock strap on. I didn't have a problem getting down to my underwear, but C was a bit apprehensive. So, we were just drinking, smoking, talking, watching stupid shit on tv. My roommate (O 22) comes home, and joins the fun. C is completely jealous because H is paying attention to O, sitting in his lap, and just being flirty. C is also upset because I told him some truths about his ex-boyfriend and it's like the last straw for him. He just way over drinks, ends up getting stupid drunk, and sick. So, he's in the bathroom getting sick, and H is taking care of him. H gets tired of it, and I go in to support him. C ends up breaking down into tears because of everything, being disappointed again with his ex-boyfriend, and the jealousy of H paying attention to someone else. We put him in my bed, since I have my own bathroom. I join him in bed, but he wants H to be there too. I go out to the living room, O and H are cuddled on the couch and just playing a little with each other. I tell C that they are busy, so he storms out to the living room, then comes back in.

H finally comes in, and is ready to fuck C, but C is way to sick to do anything. So, C, H and myself all get in bed. I don't remember if H jacked off right then, or if it was in the morning, but I helped him with that. They stay over that day, and the next. We do more drinking, smoking, and whatnot. No sex, or playing around other then H jacking off once. So, finally they are ready to leave, we smoke a bowl, and H wants to jack off before they go back home (50 minute drive.) So, H and I go in the bedroom, but C is pouty, doesn't join us, but keeps coming in every few minutes interrupting us. Finally, we told him to either join or leave us alone. I'm fingering H while he's jacking off. Finally get done with that. They leave...

I don't here from them again until the next Sunday, I'm leaving a bar around midnight. A little bit more than tipsy, and smoking a blunt with two gentlemen in the parking lot. While doing that, C calls me in a complete panic.

He can't get in touch with one of his friends and is near a complete panic attack because he thinks his friends going to get raped, or beat up. I go up and meet him. I try to call him down, but he's so freaking worried about his friend. So, we take my car, go over to where his friend is supposed to be (another of my friend's friends.) He keeps calling and texting. I keep saying, let's just go up to the door and knock on it. Finally his friend answers and basically berates C for his concern and panic. I ask C if he can drive me home, but he didn't want to leave his car. So, I follow C to my house. He comes in and we talk for about an hour about things, mostly boys and relationships. He goes home.

Over the weekend I texted H a couple of times commenting on one of his facebook photos. He says he misses hanging out with me and my roommate. Monday I invite him over to chill, but he was busy and almost out of gas.

Tuesday, he's texting me about how stressed he is, and what's been going on in his life (including him being sexually assaulted, raped, learning a friend had been murdered, and another friend who committed suicide.) He was really down, depressed, and his anxiety was going through the roof. I invite him over to chill, tell him he can stay for a couple of days to relax. He finally comes over, and tells me not to tell C that he came over my place. Mostly wanted to avoid anymore drama. He also brings one of his girl friends over. We smoke and drink, and talk a lot. So, couple hours later we drive up to his town and drop off his friend. While there we get weed and pills, C meanwhile has been fretting about where H is, and what's going on. C travels up to H's hometown and starts hanging with a friend of H, (T 17)

So, they ( C&T ) stalk H's facebook account and get in touch with H's boyfriend in another state. They are trying to find out what was up with H. H had blocked his number, until after we got the pills. C also wanted some, so H tells him to meet at a parking lot. C immediately gets flush with anger and jealousy when he sees me with H. After we do a pill buy for C, H learns what C was doing with T. This gets H so mad at what they were doing that he tells C to just leave and go away. H get's extremely upset and anxious about everything. I'm texting with C telling him not to worry and not to come over my house. H basically wanted a drama free week, and C is just a complete drama queen. He even threatened to kill himself if I didn't let him come over.

We finally get home around 2am, and H wants to jack off. No problem, I'm dead tired, so we get naked, and I'm mostly concentrating on him. He gets completely horny for me to be inside him, so he starts trying to get me hard. We tried that for a couple hours, but I was exhausted, I told him it probably wasn't going to happen that night. He did manage to bruise my pubic bone while he was grinding on me trying to get me hard. We had a little penetration, but not complete sex. Next morning, same thing, I'm still exhausted, we get some more penetration and thrusting but still not complete sex. I've always had a more difficult time sex-wise with people I actually care about. Hookups/one night stands, usually no issues, care about someone and I get nervous and anxious. Also my first time doing anal sex with anyone.

So, we hang out for the day, I'm texting with C a bit to try and get him to leave us alone. At first, I'm just trying to let him down gently, but he keeps at it, and I start playing a little harder with what I'm telling him. Basically I was trying to tell C that H wasn't interested in him anymore, since C went behind his back, contacted his boyfriend, and was basically just stirring shit up. So, C spends the next couple of days trying to convince me that H is only with me to try and get benefits ($$$) from me. Starts bringing up shit about H, trying to drive a wedge between the two of us. Trouble for him is that H had been completely open and honest about his past with me already. So everything that C tells me, I knew about already. Didn't faze me at all.

Friday rolls around, and H hasn't been able to contact his boyfriend. He is just frantic about it all weekend. C keeps bugging H and I, at which point on Sunday H calls the police to file a complaint. Later that day, H decides that he needs to go to Ohio to see his boyfriend, and figure out what's going on. I loan him my car, and he takes a friend (S 17) there. First it was going to be just a day, but they get a late start. So, he calls and asks me if he can stay a couple extra days. I say sure, can you come back on Wednesday.

So, Wednesday night rolls around, and I get a frantic call around 1:30 am on Thursday night. His friend has taken my car and left him stranded in Ohio. I finally get in touch with his friend, she makes up some story about being held against her will. I really didn't care at that point. I have a friend drive me up to get my car, and then I head to Ohio to pick up H and his stuff that was still with his boyfriend. When all was said and done, the girl friend stole my car, took H's money, and my nightstick/stungun that was in the car.

So, we get H calmed down enough about all that. That was last Thursday/Friday and since then C has been harassing H, stalked his facebook and was contacting people saying H had slept with my roommate and his boyfriend (both of whom are HIV+) C also seems to be getting his friends to call H and harass him. C also was colluding with S to find out more shit, contacted another ex of H's. Just trying to stir shit up.

So, that brings us up to speed on the last couple of weeks. I hate drama. I'm committed to helping H, as he currently does not have a job, and didn't have a chill place to stay. I've indulged him a little, he needed some clothes before he went to Ohio, he wanted his nails done, and he wanted hair extensions. Not a whole lot of money for me to give him, besides he wanted to visit a sex shop and get some things to play together. Also got me a few nice presents. He hadn't asked me to give him anything, I'm just a naturally giving and compassionate person, I help my friends and strangers when they need it. C is completely blocked and I'm not contacting him anymore. He's continuing to harass H.

So, I have no clue what to do about C. Can he be brought up on cyber-harassment charges? Can S be brought up on theft charges, even though she returned the car? She also got pulled over for speeding, but made up the story about being held against her will. H wants to beat the living shit out of C, and I'm almost there to.

Anyone have any thoughts on what I should? Would a restraining order be the right thing to do? Would it make it so if he continues to harass H he could go to jail?

I'm not going to abandon my new friend (H,) we are really starting to bond. I'd like to go make C pay for the trouble he caused, maybe damaging his cars a bit (like deflating the tires, or smashing some windows.) I'm not a violent person, but C is really stretching my limits. I'd love to just put a bullet in his head since he threatens to commit suicide all the time. Ugh... that's what I get for involving myself with teenagers.
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#2
Sorry to be blunt...but getting right to the point...you answered your own question:

Ugh... that's what I get for involving myself with teenagers.

Being the "cool older guy" who provides booze and marijuana and "anything I can do to help" is a hazardous situation...for all of you.....and you might not be totally honest with yourself about your own intentions....or maybe you are and you didn't include that part here?

There were two "helpful guys" when I was in HS...and there was always drama. They owned a house...were cousins...and they had the sportscar...speedboat...and all the booze and drugs any of us wanted. Drama ensued...always...24/7...and they always were furious with someone.

I got raped at that house by two of their adult friends. One turned out to be a minister...imagine that Rolleyes . I didn't create any drama over it because I kept it to myself and they didn't find out about it.

If you continue on this road.....expect more of the same.
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#3
Change your phone number and find new friends.
I bid NO Trump!
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#4
Welcome to GS! Well, I read your entire post. It was like one of those reality shows where you're not sure you have the characters completely sussed out, but you're pretty sure you'd like to change the channel, as you can't relate to anything that's going on.

What should you do? Whatever you'd like, I guess. You've thrown your lot in with this group of people, and it's a lot easier to pour the dressing on the salad than it is to get it back off again. Everybody involved in the story (including H) comes across as one of those people who comes with a bunch of friends, "friends", hangers-on, friends-of-friends, "sources", and whatever else...and invariably some of them are going to be assholes and do shitty things. And, just an invariably, you won't be able to pick and choose which people in this group you'll be dealing with. Should you somehow hold on to H and get rid of C, there's going to be more alphabet soup on the horizon.

Personally, I'd kick everybody to the curb, because I don't see anybody in this soap opera that I'd like to have in my life. My life would make for a terrible reality show or soap opera, but then again, I don't have to write multipage threads on messageboards trying to explain the situation and get advice. Some might consider that too high a price to pay, though.

Lex
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#5
Yeah, I read your whole post too...*groans and dry swallows three aspirin...*

What should you do? IDK...grow up and act your age? You're 50 years old, everyone you're involved with is younger than me, some of them aren't even legal...shit, I'm 24 and I don't fuck around with freaking 17 year olds...

And OMFG...you have the nerve to say that you hate drama...?
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#6
Hmm... It would appear you invited all of this into your life, now you are tired of it - uninvite it.

Restraining orders, cops, courts.... Well those I would use when I have exhausted other routes first.
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#7
Wait, I haven't read all that yet and may very well not bother unless it's hot... someone tell me, is it HOT?

Or is this just another installment of Drama Llama's THE GAYS OF OUR LIVES?!

[Image: drama-llama.jpg]

[Image: 7248c48ccd6bd686e6904a8361d5a649.jpg]
.
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#8
MikeW Wrote:Wait, I haven't read all that yet and may very well not bother unless it's hot... someone tell me, is it HOT?

I once said that some people can write about doing their laundry and hold me enthralled. Whereas other people can write about all the "right" topics - sex, crime, interpersonal relations - and leave me completely uninterested.

No points for guessing which applies here. Smile

Lex
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#9
everyone else has pretty much said it....you invited the drama in.
[Image: 51806835273_f5b3daba19_t.jpg]  <<< It's mine!
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#10
Sorry, Mike. It is not hot.
I bid NO Trump!
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