02-26-2013, 06:25 PM
hi all. this is my first thread here. i came here as an immigrant with humanitarian reasons, just like a refugee. i came out because i was forced to get married. and i was studying at that time. my father renounced me and threatened me. a typical middle eastern man. so i had to escape. after 2 years i started talking to my family. . now i talk to them once in while, but never told them where i live. still concerned they might find me somehow. especially we have relatives in canada.
the thing is, an organization paid all my tuition. in return i had to finish school and get a degree. i was doing pretty well, until i came out. my brother told me that the organization is after them to get their money, almost 30 grands. i don't care that much about my father, he made me go through a really bad situation. i was abused and depressed for the whole time. i tried to end my life a couple of times. now, when i just started putting my life back on track, i heard that my family is destroyed because of me.
should i go back, and i know what would happen to me? should i tell them i escaped because my father threatened me for being gay? and being gay is already considered a crime over there. or should i let my family sink, and i still love them?
i don't think i will take this, i am considering ending my life.
the thing is, an organization paid all my tuition. in return i had to finish school and get a degree. i was doing pretty well, until i came out. my brother told me that the organization is after them to get their money, almost 30 grands. i don't care that much about my father, he made me go through a really bad situation. i was abused and depressed for the whole time. i tried to end my life a couple of times. now, when i just started putting my life back on track, i heard that my family is destroyed because of me.
should i go back, and i know what would happen to me? should i tell them i escaped because my father threatened me for being gay? and being gay is already considered a crime over there. or should i let my family sink, and i still love them?
i don't think i will take this, i am considering ending my life.