Roommate Problems! Help Please

[jonestom9876]

So I posted about this situation I have a while back when it started to take a turn for the worst but now I'm still lost, confused, and at least more hopeful.

[fjp999]

Goodness... you are both nearly body slamming each other in public on the dance floor.

Nearly fondling in private on the sofa.

Now get it on

btw, do you want to discuss the "immoral procedures" this discovery was made? Will this cause some issues in the future :O

[Geminize]

I have to agree: it's time to let him know how you feel, either with words or actions! How about something up-front like, "Right now I really just want to (be with, touch, hold, hug, kiss) you." Use which ever word you think will get his attention without being too threatening. Being roommates complicates things a little if things don't go well, but it sounds as if he's into you.

[posterpicture]

just kiss him, if his eyes shut then he is into you. If not then he is just going to shut your eyes with his fist. Not that much to loose

[darunzahn]

He's your friend and your roommate on top of the feelings you have for him, so I assume you want to play things on the safer side. Safe or not though, you've got a real shot at something here and I don't think you'd want to live thinking about it like a missed opportunity. I like that you've taken into consideration that he is in a relationship and I think it's safe advice just to say "don't do anything you wouldn't want to get caught doing."

My suggestion is to approach it starting from what you know, your feelings for him. If you feel comfortable coming out to him then you could let him know that you are gay and that he is an attractive and fun guy. I don't know what proof you're going off for his attraction to guys, so I highly advise avoiding language that would seem to put words in his mouth or make him feel like he is being outed. While you may know or think he has feelings for men, only he knows to what extent and he should get the chance to say those things first. You can also be forward with him by letting him know that you didn't know whether to take some things as signals or not.

I really hope it works out for you both. There's no easy way through it and there's always the chance people will react poorly, but there's always the chance that things might just be better than perfect.

[rmf]

I would tell them how you feel!

[megumidesu]

just kiss him, if his eyes shut then he is into you. If not then he is just going to shut your eyes with his fist. Not that much to loose

tbh those aren't the only reactions he could have , lol .

[EvenOlderButWiser]

Stop pussy footing around the subject, and stop this immoral procedures malarky (i.e. Spying on him)

Tell him your gay. No need to tell him you want to jump into bed with him yet. If that happens, so be it.

If you guys can't communicate NOW while practically mauling each other, then there is zero chance of having a relationship of any type.

Ah the youth of today......

ObW
X

[Vaylen]

I would say, be honest with him. Express your feelings. For better or worse, it is always best to be honest, otherwise it will still keep eating you up. Tell him that you feel strongly for him and allow him to decide for himself what he wants to do with his life...but I think it's best to be honest and spill the truth for him.

I would personally not recommend kissing him as confession, rather than verbally telling him. It could be rather overwhelming if that happens.

[pellaz]

this is a good example why gay men are out and also quickly draw a line for the straight men in their group

... I'm still lost, confused, and at least more hopeful ... my roommate began dating this girl that he had been trying to get for at least a few months. While everyone else was relatively happy for him, it killed me inside every time I saw them together. ...

I think you have become too attached to this person to have an objective opinion. you need to get another room mate and move on with your life.

... Through somewhat immoral procedures I found out that he had an interest in men. To my knowledge he has no idea that I know this to be fact and have seen proof of it. Anyways, he is completely closeted and even makes the somewhat typical anti-gay comments that closeted gay men may make. To be clear, I am also closeted ...

you need to get past other people's moral issues and work on defining your life. Only you can do this. Dont know your situation, your environment but most of the time its no big to be a gay man. your friends will just want you to be the best person you are already. Make sure you come out to your benefit but at the same time dont get down if you cant.




you more than appreciate your friend. In coming out to him he could wish you the best or he could think the only reason you are friends is a sexual attraction. Which is possible true. You have to respect he must first acknowledge him self as gay or bi and you cant do much about it.