"you don't look gay to me"

[OrphanPip]

I read somewhere, and it was very convincingly put that the stereotype of Gay men as coy and effeminite is largley an invention of the last 100 years, maybe that's because we face less prejudice ,I agree with bowyen arrow I hate the term straight acting, etc we are a whole range of things Gay or straight ,and for me truth is the best things, even if one seems stupid

The idea of gay people existing is not much more than 100 years old.

[Sport77]

It depends. Some people manage to say things like that without intending to be offensive. Of course I think it's bad when people associate a sexuality with a certain look/behaviour but if they're generally accepting I don't really mind "blunders" like that. After all they have been raised in a society that promotes stereotypes in media as well as fiction so all I ask for is acceptance - not complete understanding even if that'd be ideal.

Exactly. I am going to tell my boss fairly soon that I'm gay. I'm 99% certain that I'll blow his mind and he'll have some comment about me not looking or acting gay. I've known the guy for 14 years and I just expect it. Kind of like a reflex action. No insults to me intended.

[Geminize]

I have only been actively bisexual for a year. My boyfriend has been gay his whole life, and very involved in the gay community in Seattle. As I meet his friends and go to gay clubs and events in the city, I have definitely noticed that there is a gay culture that influences the way guys act, dress, talk, etc. It's not 100%, of course: there is a range within that culture, but it is noticeable. I'm sure this culture varies from city to city, region to region, country to country. Stereotypes emerge from the differences between gay culture and "mainstream" culture.

I don't "look or act gay", except in the bedroom (and then it's not an act). I'm just a guy who enjoys the company of men and women, and I have a steady boyfriend.

[EvenOlderButWiser]

I told him I could think of at least six things I do that he would recant at any one.

Only 6?



ObW
X

[Bowyn Aerrow]

This is true; but did you know?
Pink used to be the boy's colour(Blood, aggression, assertiveness) and blue for girls(Virgin Mary, purity, passive.)
...
Why do I get the feeling everyone here knows this already?

I knew this, I don't know if everyone does/did.

[partisan]

My last partner said I looked gay when we first met, I'm aware I have some mannerism that may be Percieved as "feminine" I think it's more important to be true, it not healthy to try to act against your nature, if need be I can converse with all types of people, some "butch macho" men as they refer to themselves are not at all in my opinion,and I find myself more of a man than they, I agree with orphanpip,all this is only opinion, and in a format such the talk is "pretty stunted" I could go on forever but just can't be bothered, I come on here to make freinds, Im just considering going back to my ex then I’ll proberly quit this, I will awnser any question from anyone anytime

[partisan]

The strong silent man, silent because he has nothing to say, and considered some strong because of his silence

[bluefox4000]

Ha....I ACTUALLY had someone say to me......oh you're of of those part time fags......I proceeded to laugh in his face. And said....you're a fulltime asshole.

Mick

[mihai]

i got this last night ... i told him yes i don't look gay and i left to the dance floor. he camed after me.

[kennyw429]

a few months ago when i watched the clip "it could happen to you" for the first time, i was moved. i asked my straight male colleague to watch it, i told him it's inspiring. what i wanted him to see was the message of fighting for your rights, not really the gay story. i could see his facial expression changed, i thought he must have been offended, and guess what he said to me..

"are you gay? well.. i don't mind to have gay friends, just don't harrass me."

i was offended indeed hearing that. how ignorant. I am surrounded by homophobic friends and family in my life, sadly...