How are you today?

[Dan1980]

Hmm, thats odd. I mean, I don't know the guy or what your relationship is like with him so I can't guess whats up. It really sucks though, I know. So sorry he's doing this :/

It is odd. We were so close.

[mrk2010]

Today has been great :biggrin: I picked up my cap and gown as I am that much closer to graduation. After much stress, commitment and determination I can finally relax a bit.

I picked up mine a few weeks ago, I can't wait either. :-)

[Mrmatty376]

He's probably just going through something or is afraid to tell you about something. I doubt he's mad at you since you said nothings been up before he stopped talking. I'd just hold back and give it some time. Might want to push a random message at him once and a while so that he knows you do care about him. Don't ask him anything, just a "Hey, hope your well, miss ya." type thing, but keep it at a minimum, like once a week or every few days. Creepers are creepy lol. If he's mad or something i'm sure he'll tell you, but if its something else I dont know. anywho, just a suggestion, best not to take my word for it, could be something completely out of my knowledge, and keep in mind I dont know much. hehe

[Nick9]

I'm sorry :frown:
With him I tend to do that a lot only because it's hard to resolve thigns with him. I know it sucks to be on the receiving end, But I just can't bring myself to talk to him about it. In my case, I know that the outcome will turn out to be him saying "oh, I understand" and then a subject change rather than an "i'm sorry" or "wanna talk about it" and then I'll give in.

Matty you don't make it easy for him. I think you should tell him and also tell him what you need from him. He can't read your mind. You will be apart for a quite long time, you can't wait till you get back to have this talk. I am afraid you keep changing your view of your former friendship according to your current mood. Sometimes you talk very nicely about him, and sometimes you are mad at him. It's okay. But I doubt that he understands.
I think you should talk to him or write him

[Dan1980]

He's probably just going through something or is afraid to tell you about something. I doubt he's mad at you since you said nothings been up before he stopped talking. I'd just hold back and give it some time. Might want to push a random message at him once and a while so that he knows you do care about him. Don't ask him anything, just a "Hey, hope your well, miss ya." type thing, but keep it at a minimum, like once a week or every few days. Creepers are creepy lol. If he's mad or something i'm sure he'll tell you, but if its something else I dont know. anywho, just a suggestion, best not to take my word for it, could be something completely out of my knowledge, and keep in mind I dont know much. hehe

I really hope he is ok. I will send him a message next week.

[Mrmatty376]

Matty you don't make it easy for him. I think you should tell him and also tell him what you need from him. He can't read your mind. You will be apart for a quite long time, you can't wait till you get back to have this talk. I am afraid you keep changing your view of your former friendship according to your current mood. Sometimes you talk very nicely about him, and sometimes you are mad at him. It's okay. But I doubt that he understands.
I think you should talk to him or write him

I have told him. I've told him plenty of times that I need him around. But he doesn't care. Last time he was like "Oh, well I tend to ditch people." What the fuck kind of answer is that? But I let it slide and acted like nothing was wrong in the first place and he was fine with it. He talks to me like he's trying to be involved in my life and I try to ask him how thigns are going but he doesnt tell me anything. I have to find out from his friends on facebook that he's been going places and doing things. He won't tell me simple things anymore, but I push it aside and just keep everything nice and calm. He told everyone else about it when he changed his major and when he applied to a college but I had to dig to find out. He doesnt tell me that he has other friends or that he does things. Then he goes and tells me one thing but then I find out he's being doing other things been doing with his gf.
I admit, most of it's just jealousy. But I was sure we were friends and now we're just two people that happen to know each other. So if he's not going to tell me anything, then I wont say a word to him. I've never done anything wrong to him. I'm always sending him things and buying him stuff. I'm always trying to talk to him and find out if he's well. I dunno.
I say nice things because i love the guy. He'll make me happy every now and then. I'm happy on the rare occasion that he does message me back. I miss him more than anything, but he doesnt seem to care.
I dunno, i think i'm done trying to come between him and his girlfriend. If he doesn't want me anymore then whatever. It's not like there's anything left of this relationship anyways, just what I pretend there is.

[Nick9]

Hi Matty,

what about if you read a post like this:

Hi,
I need your advice, I really don't know what to do. I have this friend, let's call him M. He is my best friend, he always has been.
Some time ago he told me he was leaving me and going abroad. I was devastated. I mean we had so many plans together.
I'd tried to talk him out of it, but he was persistent. I couldn't imagine my days without him and being all alone. I had found this girl, she is nice, but I feel really bad because from then on M. is pulling away. I really don't understand it.
The last night before he left was beautiful.
But the longer he is there the stranger he is. I used to invite him to spent time with me and my gf, but he refused. I used to tell him what we did with my gf, but he always acted strange, like I was hurting him, so I stopped. I am really not sure how to talk to him anymore. It seems that what ever I say, I am hurting him.
What should I do?

You know Matty, I can be totally wrong. Just consider it

[Dan1980]

I have told him. I've told him plenty of times that I need him around. But he doesn't care. Last time he was like "Oh, well I tend to ditch people." What the fuck kind of answer is that? But I let it slide and acted like nothing was wrong in the first place and he was fine with it. He talks to me like he's trying to be involved in my life and I try to ask him how thigns are going but he doesnt tell me anything. I have to find out from his friends on facebook that he's been going places and doing things. He won't tell me simple things anymore, but I push it aside and just keep everything nice and calm. He told everyone else about it when he changed his major and when he applied to a college but I had to dig to find out. He doesnt tell me that he has other friends or that he does things. Then he goes and tells me one thing but then I find out he's being doing other things been doing with his gf.
I admit, most of it's just jealousy. But I was sure we were friends and now we're just two people that happen to know each other. So if he's not going to tell me anything, then I wont say a word to him. I've never done anything wrong to him. I'm always sending him things and buying him stuff. I'm always trying to talk to him and find out if he's well. I dunno.
I say nice things because i love the guy. He'll make me happy every now and then. I'm happy on the rare occasion that he does message me back. I miss him more than anything, but he doesnt seem to care.
I dunno, i think i'm done trying to come between him and his girlfriend. If he doesn't want me anymore then whatever. It's not like there's anything left of this relationship anyways, just what I pretend there is.

I love my friend too. It's hard sometimes.

[Mrmatty376]

Hi Matty,

what about if you read a post like this:

Hi,
I need your advice, I really don't know what to do. I have this friend, let's call him M. He is my best friend, he always has been.
Some time ago he told me he was leaving me and going abroad. I was devastated. I mean we had so many plans together.
I'd tried to talk him out of it, but he was persistent. I couldn't imagine my days without him and being all alone. I had found this girl, she is nice, but I feel really bad because from then on M. is pulling away. I really don't understand it.
The last night before he left was beautiful.
But the longer he is there the stranger he is. I used to invite him to spent time with me and my gf, but he refused. I used to tell him what we did with my gf, but he always acted strange, like I was hurting him, so I stopped. I am really not sure how to talk to him anymore. It seems that what ever I say, I am hurting him.
What should I do?

You know Matty, I can be totally wrong. Just consider it

Well, first of all, if it was him, I'd laugh cause he totally doesn't talk like that and I'd yell at him for using drugs when I tell him not to.
We've only been close friends for about 3 years. I've known him before that, but he was just another guy in the group of people I used to know. We had a buffer of one year before I left. I was leaving anyways. it was either here or san francisco. SF would have been easier, yes, but I admit I didn't think this through. But we did a ton of things and inevitably ran out of things to do which lead to us killing time by killing virtual russian commies. He never said anything about me leaving. Not a word. But I know he didn't want me to leave. He didn't start talking to her till 2 months after I left. He was chasing after 3 other girls but apparently they didnt work out. He told me about them, but he hesitated on the 4th. I was gone for 6 months, I came back and she was there, and that was the only month he asked for me to spend time with them. And even then I had no idea what they did. I'd ask if he'd want to do something but he'd just say, "cant, going out with my gf." The previous 6 months he didn't say anythign about her either. Then again, I didn't talk to him for a month after he told me he was going out with her... I admit to that wrong. But there's still no reason why he'd keep anything else from me. I don't know. Maybe it's fate. Maybe it was a temporary thing. it's kind of cruel though if you put it that way. I don't know. I really don't want to approach him with this. I'm in no mindset to accept "Oh, well i tend to ditch people" as an answer. If I don't mean anything to him, then why bother. I've given everything to stay friends with him, trying to make up for the initial mistake that started this all; leaving.

[Jay]

My friend took me to this one shopping mall after work because I requested her too. I needed to check if they sell bow ties. The shopping mall where I bought all of my bow ties has moved to a new location. Gazillion miles away.

By golly, they sell bow ties too. In fact, they sell the same brand. There is a God.

Whilst heading out from the men's department, my eyes landed on something that I should have not seen. A beautiful blue checkered shirt with a matching dark navy V-sweater. Damn it, it would suit nicely with a blue bow tie that I have.

We checked the price. Price was a bit pricy but still acceptable.

I took few steps back. "I cannot buy them. I need to spend this month's salary to buy handcraft supplies.And mother's day is coming. And I need to prepare gift goodies for workmates to celebrate my 3rd year working in our company"

My female friend patted my back. "Jay, look at this one."

She showed me another beautiful checkered shirt with a matching cardigan.

I blinked. "This place is not good for my money."

I dragged my friend out from the men's department.

I still think about that blue checkered shirt and sweater though. It keeps calling my name. Sheesh.

P.S: Speaking of bow tie, my female friend asked me to change my image. No more bow ties to work. I explained to her that I wore tie on my first year and moved to bow tie on second year. I'm more of a bow tie guy than a tie. I think I look better with bow tie too. Two other friends suggested me to change my hairstyle. "You're a designer. Do something different with your hair. Keep it long or go bald." Eh, no. I prefer clean cut classic look. And I've shaved my head many times before.