I'm pretty confused. I've been trying to understand why a simple text message from him just brightens my day in a second. The text has nothing special in it, but I still can't help but smile when he texts and/or replies. He lives far from me, he is only here during the semester. I guess I just feel like he is close to me again every time he contacts me. Feels good, but I can't help but think I'm fooling myself.
I want something between us so bad that I just don't know what I should do. I like having him around, and that's what's keeping me from at least telling him I'm bi. I don't want to risk it, but I know I have to if I wish to find out if something could ever happen. I just don't know what I should do, because I feel like any mistake I make during the process could be a total disaster!
The worst thing about being in the closet is you can't just talk to anyone about what you're feeling. If you could, there wouldn't be some place as dark as "the closet", there would be no secrets. I don't think being bi is a curse in any way... I'm proud of who I am, but I can't seem to understand why this has to be so hard.
Sorry guys, I just needed to vent.
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Posts: 10,581
Threads: 20
Joined: Aug 2011
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I'm a : Single Gay Man
Starsign: Virgo
Mood:
just going through the motions....really praying and hoping that tomorrow is a way better day
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Argh! This bore bore bore bore bore bore and I'm going crazy about it. I want to draw something, paint something, do something.
I don't find the linoleum to do some engraving work, I'm sure I left a big piece of linoleum in one of my storage-box, it's upsetting.
And none is around as usual, this place is crazy with is emptiness. <--does this word exist? LOL.
And I'm also reading the job vacancies online, but everything is ridiculous like "Are you serious? O.O"
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Ok until i try to use the internet, which isnt working all f***ing day and even now this page isnt fully loaded… im getting really f***ed off with it LOL!
Still not loaded!
Waiting…
Still waiting!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh
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