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How are you today?
SrChulo Wrote:Thank you!! It's my in-state institution, University of Medicine and Dentistry of New Jersey. It's the better of the two in the state.

I am happy to get interviews from ANY of the schools I applied to, honestly. If I am lucky enough to have a choice of where to go, it will be a very tough decision.

(I've applied to UMDNJ, New Jersey Medical School, Miami Miller, Ohio State, U. of Southern California, Temple, Drexel, Boston University, and New York University).


Wow!!! Hope you get to make that hard decision... That would mean you are in demand. Confusedmile: Good luck anyway... Suerte, cariño. :biggrin:
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Extremely exhausted. Under big stress.

Just got back from office. 12 am in the morning.

Got mistaken for a male escort whilst waiting for a cab at a bus stop.

Boss and my other managers banned me from coming to work on this Monday as I have been working like a horse for weeks.

Headache.

Going to sleep. For 4 hours. Then have to wake up to finish designing materials for Saturday's property exhibition. Goodness.

Terrible day to say the least.
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Confused.

The guy I'm dating (i thought successfully) is deciding to ignore me, i don't know why.:frown:

Not a good day:frown:
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Settled my huge project yesterday. Almost had tears as I was under a huge stress. My boss and the CEO of the property (developer) were satisfied with my work. They said I did a very good work but I personally feel like I have failed to execute and produce a good project. I personally noticed that I made a design error on 6 pieces of printed 3ft x 6ft posters for today's exhibition. But it is too late to reprint. Obviously I made that mistake due to out of focus as I designed those posters at around 11 pm in my office. Plus I didn't sleep for two days in a row. Printing cost few hundreds too. I am disappointed and embarrassed with the quality of my work. This is my first mistake within my 2 years career working in this company. But I'll try to ignore this feeling, forget it and do a better job next time.

I guess I was that stressful that I didn't remember my own cell phone number for a few days, forgot my ATM pin code (I kept putting wrong code continuously on two different ATM machines), left my house key at office (Had to sleep at a friend's house) etc. Ugh. My brain was really that tired. My eyes according to my friends and colleagues were bloody teary red. But the worst was having a micro chest pain or something (heart beat) in two random days (Last Saturday and on last Wednesday). That freaked me out as I am a health freak.

Need to get back in shape. Sure, I've never skipped my morning run daily but I am still not in the best condition considering that I've been slaving myself to work for a full month. I am mentally and physically out. I am also dehydrated as I didn't drink a lot of water daily for a month.

Received a pep talk from a friend on last Thursday that made me think deep. She pointed that I was losing confidence and worried too much on people's opinions nowadays. I didn't realize that until she pointed it out.

Life as a designer can really suck your soul when it needs to. Thank goodness it only happens once in a blue moon. I need to reclaim my life in a whole back.

P/S: Speaking of last Wednesday, I ate my lunch with one of my closest colleagues at a shopping mall's food court. She's Chinese and a Buddhist and I am technically a Muslim by race (Though I am actually officially an agnostic). So we shared our lunch by eating from the same bowl. A Muslim husband and wife sat beside us. The husband sat opposite of my friend and the wife sat opposite of me. They kept looking at us as we ate from the same bowl. I really wanted tell them a a joke at the time, "Hello, I'm not a Muslim today. It's my day off." I told my friend about it afterward. She slapped my back and laughed. Note people: I am agnostic. I don't play religion. I constantly share the same food from the same plate with my non-Muslim friends. In private and in public. So suck it.
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im very happy = got some help with me been a bit hyper n now i just sat through a film at the cinema for the first time withought causing a fuss,,everyone i whent with were very impressed with me - not much i know but its so great to be a ble to do one thing at a time finally
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Congrats, matty Smile

I'm feeling a bit sorry for myself. I slipped in the snow in town this morning and have painfully sprained my knee and ankle. People can be so kind though. A family helped me up, hammered on the door of a nearby pub so I could go inside and sit in the warm, called the paramedics. A lovely young man arrived on his bicycle within ten minutes and gave me a thorough going over (so to speak Rolleyes) and arranged for a lift back to my car which was on the other side of the river. I'm rather pleased I didn't have any work this evening. I don't think I would be up to carrying heavy p.a. cabs at the moment. I'd better be okay by Monday.

Only thing is I think I have now become an elderly cliché. :redface:
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hope ur ok m8 - the elderly cliché thing is not so bad if a hot looking medic comes along Smile..
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Jay Wrote:Settled my huge project yesterday. Almost had tears as I was under a huge stress. (...)

wow... sounds like a hectic lifestyle. I was just reading up on investing in up and coming designers. Wish i had money Big Grin

My day was incredible! I had Thanksgiving (late, i know) here in spain w/ a bunch of my friends and my sister. It was my first time hosting really anything, and it went SO smoothly. Everyone brought a dish though. Still, we ended up cooking about 5 dishes here. We have a ton of leftovers.

Okay, I'm going to vent a bit now. Skip to the end if you don't want to read it.


...Then my night took a turn. My bf and I had planned to sleep together at his place tonight. He, by the way, is still embarrassed that my sister knows we're gay & together. -_- I am not out to my roommate yet, however, who "saw" us leave together (I didn't care.. i told him "we're going out" anyway!... not a big deal to me. )

So we had an amazing few hours, it was really really fun, we had some "other" kind of fun also Xyxthumbs, and then we're just laying there, falling asleep, around 2 AM, and he goes "So, are you staying/ leaving or what?"

:mad: Honestly that just pissed me off. It had been PAINFULLY obvious that my intention was to sleep there, and he knew this. He has done this many times. I'll call and say "when should I come over?" if we had made plans. If he responds with "Pues tu que quieres hacer?" ("well, what do YOU want to do?") "...because tomorrow I have this and this and we should do it tomorrow night... etc" that means he doesn't want me to come, but he won't admit that it is HIM deciding. He tries to get me to believe that I don't want to come. I'll tell him 5 times in a conversation that I want to come over, but he keeps responding with "well what do you want to do?"

This time he told me it was because of my roommate knowing that I'd be sleeping out at his house....

He is definitely embarrassed about that. I wish he didn't care about MY roommate knowing we're together. He's MY roommate, MY friend.... they just met like 1 month ago. But I do try to respect his opinions on it.

Anyway, we spoke. I did not back down.

As he saw me packing my things to go, he went from
laughing & joking about it... to
"I didnt' do anything wrong" to
"This is a cultural difference, I didn't mean that!" to
"Ok, Stay here with me tonight.... "
"I didn't do it to get you mad" (no shit!) to
sarcastic remarks, trying to get me riled up... to
"I'm sorry, forgive me"

That is a VERY rare thing for him to say. Well, I went home and I am glad I did. In the past, he would have emerged victorious from that little discussion. Victorious in his case means me begging for forgiveness. This description and dialogue doesn't really do it justice, but it did end pretty well, and he feels bad for saying that.

I hope this doesn't come across as an overreaction, because i really don't think it was.
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SrChulo Wrote:... "This is a cultural difference, I didn't mean that!" ...
Do you think you could unravel that a little for me, Sr? Through PA I have met lots of lovely Spanish people and they have all been very accepting. I mean, same sex couples can get married in Spain, which is a bit of a rarity in the US!
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marshlander Wrote:Do you think you could unravel that a little for me, Sr? Through PA I have met lots of lovely Spanish people and they have all been very accepting. I mean, same sex couples can get married in Spain, which is a bit of a rarity in the US!

Sure. A little backstory. We like to talk about the differences between American and Spanish cultures. For example, I have always pointed out how brutally honest Spaniards can be. The other day we were talking about a friend of mine, and his comment was something like "Yea, he's very handsome in the face, but his body is terrible." Or something. I really don't like comments like that, I think they're rude and reflect poorly on whoever's saying them.

His response is that at least Spaniards are honest, and say what they feel instead of the American way of lying to someone's face and talking badly about them later. I think both scenarios are huge generalizations, even mine. But it is one thing I've noticed after living here for a while. People have seen Sex in the City or have been to Manhattan once, and they think they know Americans.

So last night, I was dressed and ready to leave. As I'd leave he'd stop me every time. He didn't want me to leave mad. You might think that sounds sweet, but it's just because he didn't want to feel like he did something wrong. "But don't be mad... but don't be mad...." So one way he tried to remedy the situation was by saying that there was a simple cultural misunderstanding. (This didn't even last long as he realized that it wasn't working). But anyway, he claimed that when he asked me "What do you want to do, stay or leave?" That he was simply asking a question and it was not loaded whatsoever. I dismissed this, because it's just not the truth. In fact, he had JUST been explaining to me how he "thought it would be nice to hang out for a little while... i have so much fun with you... bla bla bla" So, he intention was clearly to have me go home.

Let me say that I am not a drama queen, and I never get angry like this. This might be... the second time in over a year that I've actually gotten angry in front of him. He had realized that he had screwed the pooch on this one, but for almost the entire conversation, his intention was not to fix it or apologize, but just to make sure that he could go to sleep with a clean conscience. He used his classic tactics:
  • Denial
  • Bringing up irrelevant issues: "There are times when you don't want to sleep here because of x, y, z"
  • Fake apology: "it was not my intention to get you mad" (i hate this one)
  • Flipping it around "But you don't even want to sleep here...."
  • Flipping it around x2, x3, x4 "You just want to come out to andres [roommate] because you know it annoys me" completely blasphemous. How can anyone be so self centered?!?!?!?
  • Giving me the chance to give in: "Just sleep here tonight! and it's over! no problem"
  • x2: "Don't u want to be with me??"
  • Angry self pity "I can't do anything right"
Everything inbetween those tactics was "give me a kiss... give me a kiss...."

As I left, he called me. He started with the "it was not my intention to get you mad." I told him "Obviously it was not your intention to get me mad. Why would anyone intentionally try to make someone else mad???? Let's continue this tomorrow because we may both be saying things we don't mean."

And that's when he said "I'm sorry....... please forgive me."

I said "thank you for the apology, that sounds much better." and we left it like that. This morning I got another "i'm sorry" from him.
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