Can't take it anymore.

[gayboyindia24]

Hey friends..I am really fed up of everything.I am confused about everything in life whether its career,sexuality,future life,taking decisions.My latest concern is about my career.I want to be a famous person and want to make a mark in the film(india) or advertising world or.However 1thing scares me out.i.e.if i become famous then the people i had randomly slept with claim and reveal about my sexuality then? though i hardly tell my real identity 2 any1 but they might recognize my face. Only 10-12 gay guys knows my real identity n few straight guys knows about my sexuality,they found out(that is more vulnerable);what if media asks questions about my sexaulity(though homosexuality is legal in india but its nt fully acceptable yet n i dont want 2 come out),or why i am not married etc;and 1ce i become famous, i cannot have random sex,then whom will have sex with? You see moreover,i am not a handsome hunk..i have an above average cute looks with reasonable features and short 5.3ht.and a gud proportionate body which makes me feel complex though i have overcome that problem quite a bit. So my ultimate goal is to get into films as a director(can't be an actor since i am short) but fear of my sexuality being revealed scares me out,so i am trying to get into advertising and gradually i would decide whether i should move to films or not.1more thing though i am saying i want to get into films but i dont know how much i am capable of though i know i have creative potential though. Lately and lastly..i would like to mention that i am trying 2 overcome my sex addiction which is very tough and thinking 2marry in the next 5-7yrs(i am 25)and become a father soon but i doubt will i be happy that way too as i have never been with a girl and with men though i am very fond off and very much attracted sexually and emotionally but still i can't imagine two men living as husband wife-kinda weird 2 me though i have never been into a long term relationship with a man either and moreover gay life is more about sex,infidelity,kinky,insecurities,and only about looks, hardly any relationships lasts long though exceptions are there.I dont want to be alone for the whole life and don't want 2 see pity looks on peoples'face n thats why i want 2 get married 2 a woman and that is why i have stopped random sex to have a better control in refraining myself from meeting guys after marriage.Guys i know i have bored you with my story of perplexity but a good advice from you would be very very grateful.

[Geminize]

I don't know about India, but in the USA the film and advertising industries may be among the most accepting of gay lifestyles. Stopping random sex is probably a good idea as you move forward, but I encourage you to get clear about whether you would be happier in a long term relationship with a man or a woman. I think it's a mistake to marry a woman and start a family just to avoid having your sexuality questioned.

Gay life can be about love, loyalty, commitment and self discovery -- just as much as a hetero life. Let go of your limiting social conventions and be yourself!

[HomeagainNYC]

You have a dreadful amount of conflicting issues going on in your head; unfortunately, nobody but you, can sort these issues, but what I can offer is this: the single most important thing a successful director or advertising professional have in common, is an intuitive understanding of their vision, even if they are not sure, just yet, how they are going to achieve that vision. Both professions require “not playing it safe” and “completely thinking out of the box”.

You seem to want to “play it safe” and your thinking is currently “not out of the box”; you also seem to spend a lot of time look over your shoulder. As I see it, it boils down to you making this choice, either you live a life pursuing your passions and edit as necessary, or, you live a life that may be entirely, adequate, but filled with regret and confusion - because there were simply, too many, “what if’s” to get past.

I’m personally a fan of the passions; therefore, I edit a lot.

“A wise and prudent person is not thrown into confusion by reproach; but is like the flame, which, when stirred, ascends higher and higher."

[Rainbowmum]

Sweetie take a deep breath.
You are so worried about the future that you will not allow yourself to enjoy the here and now. Making up all these scenario and picturing the worst is just adding more pressure to you.

There is just too much on your plate right now and you do not need the uncertainty of the future.
As you mature you will be able to deal with things on a more certain way , right now all you can do is change the things you are able to change, instead of worrying about a scene in your future,that may or may not happen.

Baby steps one problem at a time.

We are all here for you.

[Counselor]

Hey friends..I am really fed up of everything.I am confused about everything in life whether its career,sexuality,future life,taking decisions.My latest concern is about my career.I want to be a famous person and want to make a mark in the film(india) or advertising world or.However 1thing scares me out.i.e.if i become famous then the people i had randomly slept with claim and reveal about my sexuality then? though i hardly tell my real identity 2 any1 but they might recognize my face. Only 10-12 gay guys knows my real identity n few straight guys knows about my sexuality,they found out(that is more vulnerable);what if media asks questions about my sexaulity(though homosexuality is legal in india but its nt fully acceptable yet n i dont want 2 come out),or why i am not married etc;and 1ce i become famous, i cannot have random sex,then whom will have sex with? You see moreover,i am not a handsome hunk..i have an above average cute looks with reasonable features and short 5.3ht.and a gud proportionate body which makes me feel complex though i have overcome that problem quite a bit. So my ultimate goal is to get into films as a director(can't be an actor since i am short) but fear of my sexuality being revealed scares me out,so i am trying to get into advertising and gradually i would decide whether i should move to films or not.1more thing though i am saying i want to get into films but i dont know how much i am capable of though i know i have creative potential though. Lately and lastly..i would like to mention that i am trying 2 overcome my sex addiction which is very tough and thinking 2marry in the next 5-7yrs(i am 25)and become a father soon but i doubt will i be happy that way too as i have never been with a girl and with men though i am very fond off and very much attracted sexually and emotionally but still i can't imagine two men living as husband wife-kinda weird 2 me though i have never been into a long term relationship with a man either and moreover gay life is more about sex,infidelity,kinky,insecurities,and only about looks, hardly any relationships lasts long though exceptions are there.I dont want to be alone for the whole life and don't want 2 see pity looks on peoples'face n thats why i want 2 get married 2 a woman and that is why i have stopped random sex to have a better control in refraining myself from meeting guys after marriage.Guys i know i have bored you with my story of perplexity but a good advice from you would be very very grateful.

Bold section concerns me, and take it from someone that thought getting married would "fix, phase out, or otherwise save" me. If you have had no interest in women up to this point in your life, DO NOT start a relationship with marriage in mind only for appearances. This causes damage to both parties if/when the relationship fails, both the confidence level of the woman and the conscience of the man are extremely difficult to justify after a relationship based on a lack of disclosure become fully disclosed.

I would recommend being honest with yourself. Ask yourself what you want, what you will want in the future, and discard the differences.

[Undreamt]

There is only one way for people to become more accepting of gay people.

If gay people come out.

[gayboyindia24]

Thank you very much guys for your valuable advice and support especially@rainbowmum.. Guys whoever views my posts,please do give your valuable advice to overcome my problem.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

In 2011 the population of India reached 1.241 billion... Billion that is with a B and it looks something like this:

1,241,000,000

Chances are high that you will not stand out from the other 1,240,999,999 (or so) Indians and become a famous person.

Chances are also high that if you dated (or had sex) with the local gay population that few of them would recall your face out of the other 1.24 billion faces in the nation.

If you lived in Lichtenstein (population 36,304 (2011)) then things would be far more complicated, one can assume that at that low of a number everyone knows everyone else and most likely is close to being related...

Of course I don't think Lichtenstein is well known for its celebrities .


The reality is that you are who and what you are. Your choice is not so much 'be someone else' as it is as growing comfortable in your own skin.

Another thing is you need to really consider this whole "I want to be famous thing. Hollywood (Los Angeles California) is full of actors and actresses who all had this idea of becoming rich and famous on the silver screen.... They turned out to be waitresses, mechanics, bell hops and other uninteresting things.

The odds of being a movie star are 1 in 1505000. It is more likely to be struck by lightning, cryogenically frozen, or put on the US No Fly List than to become a movie star.

Source:http://bookofodds.com/Daily-Life-Activit...Movie-Star

No where on earth is homosexually 100% accepted and tolerated. Everywhere there are haters and people so opposed to the idea of homosexuality that they jump on a soap box and make wild crazy claims that Nazis on dinosaurs will rise up out of the ground and wipe out the society if they accept gays, then they point to Canada as proof as we all well know that as soon as Canada passed gay marriage into law hell boiled over and reduced poor Canada into the nameless void it is today.

Some places do have it better, like Canada, although reduced to a smoldering waste land it appears they still accept homosexuality (will they never learn?). Other places they are so not tolerant they publicly execute gays for fun and entertainment purposes. Sadly this last is not a humorous jab at homophobes but is a real deal.

20 years ago in the USA if you were gay, good luck finding a job and keeping it if your sexuality was revealed. Today its not only illegal to fire a person for being gay, but a lot of people take great offense if you try to do it.

10 years ago not a single gay couple in the whole USofA could get married - today several states allow gay marriage (and run the risk of being over run by Nazis on Dinosaurs) .

India is somewhere in this process, homosexuality is slowly becoming more accepted and tolerated and eventually gay marriage (and Nazis on Dinosaurs) will hit India.

When I was your age the odds of gays being allowed to marry were less than the odds of a black man being President of the United States of America... Now look, today a black man sits in the oval office and one state after another is legalizing gay marriage.

If that happened in my lifetime (much to my surprise), it most likely will happen in India in your lifetime. Perhaps there is a better chance do to some of the cultural acceptances you have for certain types of people. The third sex?

Or is that another Asian nation I am thinking about?

The odds are in your favor that you will be accepted by the rest of those 1.24 billion Indians no matter of your sexuality by the time you hit 40. The odds are against you being a star or celebrity or famous.

As for the package you come in - somewhere on earth there is the right fella who dreams of you every night. The problem is that there are over 7 billion people on earth and finding him may be a bit tricky.... So don't let that package deal be a deal breaker for you... In time you will find 'the one'.... I suspect with more than 7 billion on people on earth there are a few more than just one 'the ones' out there.

[MisterTinkles]

Apparently youre obsessed about your obsession, and this is the only thing in your life.

If you arent working towards solving your problems, then things will only get worse.

If you want to become someone famous (for the right reasons), then you need to get your mentality adjusted. Sitting there obsessing about your obsessions isnt getting you famous. Well, if you crack up and go crazy, you might get your face on the evening news broadcast. Is THAT the kind of famous you want?

I would say you REALLY need to talk to a counselor, or maybe even a psychiatrist. And I despise those people, I think they are all scam artists. But Im sure there are a few real ones out there. You need to find a really good counselor or psychiatrist and get some help, otherwise it sounds like you're going to "crack up".