I'm starting to fall for a friend

[oneofcuriousity]

Okay I have a friend he's straight, but lately I have a feeling that he might be interested in me. I use to joke before I came out that he is like the stereotype gay, he's in to fashion, he dose the campest things.
I never took it as anything because I knew he liked a few girls.
But lately he is not attracted to any girl, he winks at me in the hall at school when he walks by.
I started to wonder if he is in to me and by wondering if he does like me that now I'm starting to like him.
We are close, I watch his back and he watchs mine. If I'm wrong I don't want to ruin are friendship.
So to sum it all up I need advice on what to do?

[VNight2014]

Oh gods... I'm in a similar type of problem. I wouldn't act on it. I would recommend just expressing it in an indirect way. I write letters to the object of my affections every night, but I won't give them to him until I think we have both have enough time to dwell on the fullness of their content. Or you can be extremely straightforward, which I can't assure has good results.

[Wade]

You stop that right now mister. Do I have to get my big kitchen spoon?

I said stop it! *smack* He's straight.


Or maybe he's not, who knows?

[oneofcuriousity]

There's my problem I'm starting to ask myself the question is he actually straight. People in my school ask me if he's gay and don't suspect me at all. Because he acts more flamboyant and not afraid when we wrestle/mess where his head or hands go and some times they go to the crotch and he doesn't care.

[VNight2014]

My friend has a suggestion-that I would never condone to or attempt myself-kiss him and see what happens... I recommend my solution...

[Counselor]

Ask him. Just ask him. Don't pussyfoot around it, ask. Let his answer be the one you give when others ask.

[Woollyhats]

Okay I have a friend he's straight, but lately I have a feeling that he might be interested in me. I use to joke before I came out that he is like the stereotype gay, he's in to fashion, he dose the campest things.
I never took it as anything because I knew he liked a few girls.
But lately he is not attracted to any girl, he winks at me in the hall at school when he walks by.
I started to wonder if he is in to me and by wondering if he does like me that now I'm starting to like him.
We are close, I watch his back and he watchs mine. If I'm wrong I don't want to ruin are friendship.
So to sum it all up I need advice on what to do?

You might of noticed I thanked you, it was an accident.

Also! If he knows your bi and everything, well, by all means, wink back? Say something like, "If you weren't into girls, I would totally go out with you" as a joke or something, and see how he responds.

You can flirt back in a way that's not totally overt, but gets the message across.

However, if you know he'd be cool with it, just tell him .

Or ask him how he feels about you, and find out for sure. Like I said, if he knows you're bi, the worst that could happen is for him to say he isn't interested.

[rmf]

I would stay clear if I was you

[EvenOlderButWiser]

News flash!

"Gay guy develops crush on Straight best friend"

This is so common you wouldn't believe. Try searching the forum if you don't believe me.

So are the number of straight guys who are so connected to their feminine side!

Tread carefully if you don't want to ruin the friendship completely. As others have said, if your close enough just ask him. You could try making a joke of it to gauge his reaction. You know, the old "this girl at school is interested in you, but thinks your gay...how funny is that" type of thing.....

Good Luck
ObW
X

[Bowyn Aerrow]

So because he has a sense of fashion, is 'campy' this makes him magically gay?

Does that mean that my lack of fashion, lack of camp (other than going to the woods to camp) means I'm not really gay?

Winking, flirting, and all of this other stuff doesn't mean anything either. There are straight guys who are 100% straight and so comfortable with their sexuality they can actually go to gay clubs, hang around with known homosexuals, even give homosexuals a real hug without it being a 'thing' for them.

Further, joking about being 'gay' is a straight thing - the joke is all in good fun and they may wink, throw kisses, say the most profoundly homosexual things on earth and never actually have the feelings connected.

My Brother in law and I always joke about our 'relationship' - He tells me things like if it wasn't for the old ball and chain he would be all over me. It is joking, fun ribbing. He is bonafide 100% straight and not interested in pursuing gay men.

He is comfortable in his homosexuality and knows pretty much that I have no real interest in him 'that way'.

It may be that you and this guy have this type of friendship where he feels he is just joking around with you and you accept it 100% as a joke. Of course you are 'straight' in his mind (unless you told him otherwise?) So he may assume you are straight and see this as joking, not knowing that you are gay thus may see it in another light.

Until such time he pulls you to the side and tells you he is gay, assume he is straight.

Even if he is gay, he may want everyone to think he is straight and may actually believe no-one suspects.

I assume that since you haven't told him you are gay that you have strong reasons for keeping quiet and would be horrified if people knew or suspected. Pay him the same respect you apparently want.