Advice needed: Anal sex after... um... hemorrhoid surgery :-(

[Elbereth]

I'm embarrassed to be posting about this, but hopefully some of you have some advice. I've had a lot of receptive anal sex over the years and it is pretty much my main thing when it comes to sex... but over the last few years have developed a problem with hemorrhoids that is apparently not going away. (I don't think the h's are from the anal sex, incidentally--but that's another story.) Anyway, I've seen several doctors and am afraid I probably have to have the h's taken care of with an outpatient procedure like rubber band ligation or infrared coagulation. I'm terrified of it, though, for fear it will screw up my love life and make sex more difficult afterwards. I reeeeally don't want to mess anything up down there, but I've tried all the conservative methods and though they help, they do not solve the problem.

Has anyone out there had a h procedure done, and then gone on to have anal sex? Any good or bad experiences? I'd really appreciate any experiences or advice. Thanks, guys.

[elad12]

I think having hemorrhoids is more of a detriment. I would see having them removed would be the better answer although you would have to wait for things to heal before having anal sex. Are they so bad that they need to be removed? Maybe you just need to change your diet and eat more fiber or if things need to soften up some try taking something like metamucil everyday.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

You are hitting the age when the body sags, slumps, deforms and breaks down more often than before. You are going to see a lot of this 'crappy crap, crap' taking place with your body. Like it or not if you do not get this one treated my doctors now it is only going to get worse. And while you think Anal sex isn't the cause, I can pretty much assure you that having a penis shoved up there on a regular basis ain't doing anything to make matters better.

If you continue to 'self treat' and turn around and have anal sex, you most likely are wearing things a bit thin. - making it worse. I know there are creams and preparations that can be used - but those don't actually attend the underlying disorder, its sort of like taking aspirin to address a fever caused by flu- you treat the symptom not the problem.

Litigation and other interesting options actually treat the issue. And remove the problematic tissues that have worn thing and have lost cohesion to hold things together and in.

Even after hemorrhoid treatment via a doctor there is going to have to be a bit more care taken to prevent further damage.

You are looking at two months/8 weeks before you can have anal sex after surgery. http://www.healthcaremagic.com/doctorcha...gery/50612 is one such chat/source of that information

However I strongly suggest you talk to your doctor and be open and honest about what it is you do, how often you do it. S/he will most likely have a lot of post op care instructions. Your case is individual and I have no idea what actually lead to this problem in the first place.

If its straining from constipation and you never actually do anything about the constipation and resort to the same dietary habits, well then you have a future of more hemorrhoids. So you need to really talk with a doctor to not only treat the condition but treat the cause as well.

If you don't do anything I assure you it will get worse and your love life will suffer far more, if not completely end if you don't seek medical attention early on.

[Elbereth]

I think having hemorrhoids is more of a detriment. I would see having them removed would be the better answer although you would have to wait for things to heal before having anal sex. Are they so bad that they need to be removed? Maybe you just need to change your diet and eat more fiber or if things need to soften up some try taking something like metamucil everyday.

Hi Elad12,

Thanks for your answer. I have actually been working really hard on my diet, taking fiber, drinking water, all the stuff you're supposed to do; I've been a good boy! But it seems that it's gotten to the point that something more needs to happen to solve the problem. I'm still going to give it a little more time and see if I can get it under control, but I think I need to consider a procedure and am hoping that people who've been through it can give some advice.

[Elbereth]

Hi Bowyn Aerrow,

Thanks for your reply. You're certainly right about the sagging, slumping age... Don't I know it! ;-) But I also find that diet and exercise goes a long way to stave it off. (Though not in this particular case, apparently.) Re the cause of the hemorrhoids, I think they're actually mostly from constipation/straining, as a result of a fissure I got a long time ago, from going to the bathroom. I was in a long-distance relationship for many years, and actually when we were together and having sex, I had no problems, I think because it relaxed me. It was when we were apart and not having sex that I always started to have difficulty. I'm sure you're right that anal sex can sometimes cause problems, particularly if it's rough, but it also has been shown to help with anal problems (see Jack Morin's excellent book, Anal Pleasure and Health.) In my case, I think it's probably a little of both.

Anyway, that's sort of neither here nor there at this point. I have changed my eating habits and diet, make sure I get enough fiber, and have been following all the rules for some time, and have mostly beaten the constipation thing. But the h's are not going away, and I've been told I probably do need to have a procedure so that it won't get worse, as you say. I have seen doctors fairly regularly about it and basically am trying to decide between these two procedures, IRC and banding ligation. Have you yourself had this problem and had anything done?

Thanks again.

[dfiant1]

I don't understand why people can't just talk about their own bodies freely if something bothers them, especially men...it is your life, embrace it, be as comfortable as you can.

I had a double stapled haemorroidectomy about 6 years ago. The proceedure removes a section of the bowel/anus with the roids attached and staples the 2 end back together.

Its a fucking daunting proceedure, but in my case it was something that had to be done and in the end after a few days of discomfort it was pretty much 'much ado about nothing'

Roids are basically varicose veins in the bum, blood loaded veins that protrude through a weak spot in the bowel/anus wall and can prolapse out of your bum sometimes and over time get fissures and start to bleed.

Anal sex would not be the best thing for haemorroids and I doubt it would be terrible good after surgery either, but if the only pain you are having during or after anal sex is the worry of weather you are making things worse, then I don't see a reason why you can't continue to enjoy arse fucking. You know your own body, you know how far it can go.

Personally, I myself have never really enjoyed a cock being rammed up my arse, so I couldn't tell you if it is good or bad with roids, but I do understand why you hesitate and question as when the roids flare up it isn't terribly comfortable.

You don't need to have surgery on your haemmaroids, they aren't dangerous, they can be left as they are until they start to bleed from fissures or interfere with your day to day life and comfort.

Fixing your diet is the best way to avoid further problems, a diet rich in fibre and remove as many processed foods as possible, and as someone about mentioned Metamucil or Psyllum Husks added to the diet would help as well.

The best advice you will ever get is from your own GP, so if you have any concerns go and have a chat with your doctor...rest assured, I believe most doctors have been up to their elbows in other peoples arses

[nfisher1226]

It should be noted that the dietary suggestions may actually be akin to treating a symptom here. Hard stool and excessive straining aren't always the cause of the hemorrhoids, sometimes they're just the cause of the irritation that makes them noticeable. So yeah, if you've taken care of the diet but still have the 'roids that's not really surprising.

If you have hemorrhoids, anything hard moving past them can cause irritation or in the worst cases ruptures. This includes a hard BM and I'm sure a hard cock too.

Some years back I had an issue with hemorrhoids. It was largely due to long hours in a seated position without proper exercise. My diet at the time caused some irritation and eventually regular spotting in my BM's. I got the dietary problems more under control, and eventually got out of that job and changed my lifestyle completely. Luckily for me, my body seems to have done a good job of healing on it's own. That surprised me, as my doctor at the time indicated that they don't go away on their own. My experience seems to show otherwise, at least for now anyway.

Long story short, bottoming has not been a problem for me after hemorrhoids. However, I never reached a point where treatment was really required. I can't weigh in on how the treatments might affect your sex life, but it sounds like they're medically necessary at this point anyway.

[MisterLove]

Have you tried eating natural yogurt (and I mean genuine yogurt, not the sugary crap that you find in most supermarkets)? There are countless cases of patients that were cured just because of yogurt.

Have you been to a doctor (proctologist, gastroenterologist) already? What did he tell you?

I never had hemorrhoids but I had an anal fissure once and it was horrific. Bag Balm and a cream called Quadriderm were very effective - I'm not sure if these treatments are right for you but it doesn't hurt to try. Consult your doctor first.

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.

[Elbereth]

It should be noted that the dietary suggestions may actually be akin to treating a symptom here. Hard stool and excessive straining aren't always the cause of the hemorrhoids, sometimes they're just the cause of the irritation that makes them noticeable. So yeah, if you've taken care of the diet but still have the 'roids that's not really surprising.

If you have hemorrhoids, anything hard moving past them can cause irritation or in the worst cases ruptures. This includes a hard BM and I'm sure a hard cock too.

Some years back I had an issue with hemorrhoids. It was largely due to long hours in a seated position without proper exercise. My diet at the time caused some irritation and eventually regular spotting in my BM's. I got the dietary problems more under control, and eventually got out of that job and changed my lifestyle completely. Luckily for me, my body seems to have done a good job of healing on it's own. That surprised me, as my doctor at the time indicated that they don't go away on their own. My experience seems to show otherwise, at least for now anyway.

Long story short, bottoming has not been a problem for me after hemorrhoids. However, I never reached a point where treatment was really required. I can't weigh in on how the treatments might affect your sex life, but it sounds like they're medically necessary at this point anyway.

Hi nfisher 1226,

Thanks for the reply. Well, I'm still hoping that as you experienced, maybe my hems will resolve with just diet changes, exercise, etc. Doctors have told me, as they did you, that they won't go away without a procedure... but I'm doing all the right things and staying hopeful. I don't have much trouble on the toilet anymore -- in particular since I discovered that milk products seemed to be causing constipation. I'm afraid though that I let it get too far, spent too much time struggling with constipation, and that the hems have reached the point that they're a little too much "in the way" all the time and get irritated no matter what. That's a fairly recent development, but it's been about a year and it hasn't gotten better. At some point soon I may just have to have something done and hope for the best.

[Elbereth]

Have you tried eating natural yogurt (and I mean genuine yogurt, not the sugary crap that you find in most supermarkets)? There are countless cases of patients that were cured just because of yogurt.

Have you been to a doctor (proctologist, gastroenterologist) already? What did he tell you?

I never had hemorrhoids but I had an anal fissure once and it was horrific. Bag Balm and a cream called Quadriderm were very effective - I'm not sure if these treatments are right for you but it doesn't hurt to try. Consult your doctor first.

Good luck and keep us posted on your progress.

Hi MisterLove, Great name... and you live in Madeira! Have always wanted to visit there; was just in Porto and had a great time. Anyway, back to more mundane matters... ;-) Yes, I've seen a gastroenterologist and a few anorectal surgeons. They've basically said to take fiber, drink water, take stool softeners, all of which I've been doing religiously for several years... and have said that at this point probably I should go ahead and have a procedure since the hems are bothering me. The question is which procedure... and whether there's any chance they'll resolve if I just stick to good diet habits, etc. The jury is still out. (But they're getting tired! ...And a bit sore.)

I also have struggled with fissures, which I think is partly got me into the hemorrhoid mess in the first place. Horrific, indeed! Glad your problem went away.

And thanks for answering.