Online Relationship Problems - Advice

[Anonymous]

I was talking to this guy online for 2 months and we were getting closer. We talked about getting together in the future and the "L" word was mentioned. We never had any arguments and we would talk together for hours on Skype every night. I saw the more I gave him that he gave me even more.
Anyway I had exams and told him that I wouldn't be able to speak as long but he said he was going away for a week. That worked out perfectly I thought and I told him he would have a nice email when he did come back (which he did). However since he came back he has been distant and after a couple of days I said I didn't like being ignored so he replied and said we would talk the following night - he never showed. I was really pissed off but sent him an email saying I hoped he would find someone he would love and that he was really talented and how hard this was for me but I thought it wouldn't work between us.
Now I regret it.
He is a scorpio and I know scorpio guys disappear every now and again for various reasons.
At first I thought is was because he was bored or he just wasn't that into me and I thought what better way to show someone you loved them than by setting them free and making them happy. What a stupid thought!
He probably did it for a reaction to see how I felt or because he needed to think things out or because he was just busy. Whatever it was I am not a mind reader.
Any advice is welcome particularly from other scorpio guys. I jumped to the wrong conclusions probably and know if he felt for me that anything mentioning a break up would have hurt him. I don't want to keep messaging him as he will think I am weak and needy so if anyone has ideas I would love to hear them. I am really into this guy bigtime.

Thanks for reading

[loserguy]

I think you were too hasty all you can do is wait and see how or if he responds. Scorpios tend to test to draw out you reactions sometimes and patience is the key. If he does reply you'll have some explaining to do!

[swalter]

#1 Astrology isn't real. It's the remnants of man's earlier, primitive attempts to ascribe agency and cosmic influence to the individual. It's utterly arbitrary, and completely unsubstantiated by science. When you say this guy is a Scorpio, you might as well be saying he's from Narnia.

#2 Online relationships don't work. Relationships, especially ones where love is involved (the L word? Really?) require real, physical connection and intimacy. Skype is a good supplement for busy couples, but is no replacement for a real relationship involving proximity and physical contact. My guess is that, with time away from your Skype fling, he found someone else, someone IRL. I think you should move on from this virtual thing, and find someone real, who you can touch, and have physical contact with.

[Ryocchi]

First and foremost, if your prediction is true, why would you put up with someone who test you like that?

It's basically telling him, "Here I'm your doormat, use me."

He promised to talk to you, he didn't show, possibly he's evading you because there's an unpleasant conversation waiting to happen, the reason why I don't like on-line relationships is that nothing actually stop them from talking/chatting spending time with other guys and "dating" them as he dates you, I had my fair share of that drama when I was younger and it was a mess.

[Sylph]

That just sounds like sooooo much and I just think it wise to slow down and breathe for a second. It's okay to crawl before you walk,

Tho I married my Husband Miles pretty spontaneously(not seriously :< ) , I don't think after 2 months of any kind of relationship, should such strong emotions and promises and what not should even occur.


It takes people 2 months just to even remember the basics of someone else's life, let alone throwing the L word in there.

For example, I've talked to Miles for months and while we jokingly(for the most part ;0 ) play house, it really would be unwise if I were to just hop on a plane and do all the boyfriend stuff, just because we've known each other for a long time.

I think more time needs pass before such important decisions are made :I

[southbiochem]

Ok, first: drop the Astrology thing for the fallacy it is. Seriously.

If you're going to base your relationships on unfounded nonsense like that you're probably going to set yourself for numerous disappointments.

As for your guy. Unwise indeed to get into an online relationship and expect it to become something.

It can happen, but what is available to you will probably have more weight. In this case, and I maybe wrong, sounds to me that your guy found someone and he doesn't want to tell you.

[Evan88]

Have you ever met him?

Meet him first before indulging in a serious relationship.. Online is good for friends, and establishing rapport but making it officially a relationship online, that's not feasible. Though it worked for some, it wont for others.

And yeah drop the astrology thingy because people are different in their own ways, you can't stereotype someone just based on astrology. Like in my case, I don't think all the personality traits of Leo fits me. So yeah drop it. Be more logical in your approach about your relationship with him

[Miles]

First thing: astrology is bullshit and has no basis in reality, so stop making assumptions based on that. Seriously. Stop forever.

Second thing: I can't fathom how you could be talking about 'love' after knowing a guy for only two months, and not even in person. You don't know someone after two months, especially online, where they can more easily show only what they want you to see.

I dunno, talk to him, tell him your feelings, work it out or move on. You have to communicate. If he can't do that, there's nothing to be done.

[Sylph]

First thing: astrology is bullshit and has no basis in reality, so stop making assumptions based on that. Seriously. Stop forever.

Second thing: I can't fathom how you could be talking about 'love' after knowing a guy for only two months, and not even in person. You don't know someone after two months, especially online, where they can more easily show only what they want you to see.

I dunno, talk to him, tell him your feelings, work it out or move on. You have to communicate. If he can't do that, there's nothing to be done.

[Anonymous]

Thank you all so much for your replies.

I have been stupid and online relationships are not real.