What Do You Look For In A Partner?

[Virge]

Before leaving last week to visit my man I wrote this long rant on what I'd discovered I was looking for and found in a man. Here's part of it.


[COLOR="Blue"][SIZE="2"][I]That was 2006 and this is 2014. Now I can tell you or anyone what qualities to look for in a man because not a day passes anymore that I don't feel a need to repay my debt to god -- whatever and whoever god is -- for letting me meet a man who was everything I wanted and needed even before I was ready to admit that I wanted or needed a man.

Here's a list.
After everything on this list add the words "the better."
The smarter..
The more confident....
The gentler...
the more patient...
The more understanding...
The more perceptive...
The stronger...
The more goal oriented...
The more inspiring....
The more honest....
The less opinionated...
The less moody and sulky...
The less demanding...
The less expecting....

There's probably another 100 things to add to that list.
It doesn't hurt at all if he has a smile that never goes away even when he's mad.
It helps if he's as much fun to look at dressed or undressed
It's great if he likes making fun of himself and you as well
He has to have a young heart and an oddball sense of humor you understand immediately.
And he has to look at you with looks only you know mean something.
[/SIZE][/I][/COLOR]

Once Jay read it he went a bit mushy on me and I did the same. Then we added to the list and are planning on using it as our wedding vows in July. We said the words an impromptu wedding ceremony with friends before I left there about what we wanted to be to each other with one of us saying the first part and the other adding "the better" at the end of each.

It turned out real nice.

I'll be forever in debt to Adam and his smarter better half for inspiring me to finally sit down and compose my thoughts on this.

[Steve]

Before leaving last week to visit my man I wrote this long rant on what I'd discovered I was looking for and found in a man. Here's part of it.


[COLOR="Blue"][SIZE="2"][I]That was 2006 and this is 2014. Now I can tell you or anyone what qualities to look for in a man because not a day passes anymore that I don't feel a need to repay my debt to god -- whatever and whoever god is -- for letting me meet a man who was everything I wanted and needed even before I was ready to admit that I wanted or needed a man.

Here's a list.
After everything on this list add the words "the better."
The smarter..
The more confident....
The gentler...
the more patient...
The more understanding...
The more perceptive...
The stronger...
The more goal oriented...
The more inspiring....
The more honest....
The less opinionated...
The less moody and sulky...
The less demanding...
The less expecting....

There's probably another 100 things to add to that list.
It doesn't hurt at all if he has a smile that never goes away even when he's mad.
It helps if he's as much fun to look at dressed or undressed
It's great if he likes making fun of himself and you as well
He has to have a young heart and an oddball sense of humor you understand immediately.
And he has to look at you with looks only you know mean something.
[/SIZE][/I][/COLOR]

Once Jay read it he went a bit mushy on me and I did the same. Then we added to the list and are planning on using it as our wedding vows in July. We said the words an impromptu wedding ceremony with friends before I left there about what we wanted to be to each other with one of us saying the first part and the other adding "the better" at the end of each.

It turned out real nice.

I'll be forever in debt to Adam and his smarter better half for inspiring me to finally sit down and compose my thoughts on this.

Now I feel all mushy and gooey inside. I cry at weddings you know. I hope you picked out a great ring. Next thing you know you'll be changing your avatar. You'll be all respectable and sh*t. Oh well, there are always the posts you left behind, little reminders of you before you were tamed.

Or am I wrong and about to be slammed into a smart-ass spear? (No worries, I would never, never attempt a lascivious double entendre on a man headed toward marital bliss.) Something tells me deep in the pit of my gut where fear lives a champagne and caviar life that nothing would change you quite that easily.

Oh, hi Virgil. I'm Steve and I arrived just after you left and have made a complete nuisance of myself since. I've been waiting to meet you,,, your reputation here is legendary you know. Are you itching gray matter in your avvy?

I'm dead tired, so chances are (someone cue the Johnny Mathis song here) just because I wear a silly grin it means I haven't slept in a while, so I'll probably miss your homing home party. But Mark (my partner) won't mind if I dream about you. We're old...it doesn't count as improper. Have fun.

xx

[Virge]

Hi Steve.

I'm doing the jet lag schedule readjustment now so I understand going without sleep. I have to be a functional human Monday morning. No sleep for another 13 hours to get back on Central Mountain Time. I change my avatar when the mood hits me but the is the one that people love to hate.

I'm going to need a day or two to get back up to speed and come up with mischief here in GS. Give me a bit of time to get back to being me.

[Bluelight]

Idk, someone nice who I have some stuff in common with.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

I used to say breathing and a pulse... But I admit I'm not that picky.... :eek:

I have preferences in men... but in reality there isn't much I can think of that I absolutely need.

A nice guy would be...um... nice. Someone who isn't going to use or abuse me. I grew weary of those two things 2-3 relationships ago (never stopped me from getting into more user relationships though).

I figure if anyone can stand being around me and my mess, they deserve a chance.

Besides, chemistry isn't something that usually fits into a nice list of things one thinks they need in a partner.

[AdamAndWill]

I used to say breathing and a pulse... But I admit I'm not that picky.... :eek:

I have preferences in men... but in reality there isn't much I can think of that I absolutely need.

A nice guy would be...um... nice. Someone who isn't going to use or abuse me. I grew weary of those two things 2-3 relationships ago (never stopped me from getting into more user relationships though).

I figure if anyone can stand being around me and my mess, they deserve a chance.

Besides, chemistry isn't something that usually fits into a nice list of things one thinks they need in a partner.

Will: The chemistry part for sure. When I first met Adam, he was everything I thought I didn't want, and he thought the same about me. Everything about each of us was a deal breaker for the other. But the chemistry was powerful...and it's still working for us 6 years later.

[Virge]

Will: The chemistry part for sure. When I first met Adam, he was everything I thought I didn't want, and he thought the same about me. Everything about each of us was a deal breaker for the other. But the chemistry was powerful...and it's still working for us 6 years later.

Yeah... CHEMISTRY is what it's all about

Jay and I had NOTHING in common when we met but the chemistry was there. He'd never dated a guy younger than himself and imagined himself ending up with a doctor or college professor. He came up with a thousand good reasons for us to just be FWBs... just because of the chemistry... So..... after for 2 years he dated around looking for a guy he'd have equal or more chemistry with and always kept coming back to me for what other guys didn't have. Then he decided a mud loving Yank from a smalltown wasn't so bad... and took the chance of his lifetime and gave me a chance. Chemistry is what it takes to have a sense of "US" in a relationship... not so much the idea that you like the same things and have read the same books.

All the stuff you dont have in common becomes part of the chemistry as you absorb each others knowledge and enjoy each others likes. He taught me to surf. I taught him to ride horses. He loves to read in bed. I learned love to listen to him read aloud... in bed. He loves dressing up and I love dressing down so we both learned the benefits of all that from each other.

It's like the "melding" and alloying process of mixing two completely different elements that makes something with characteristics that neither of them possess alone. Sodium and Chlorine are both poisons until they combine to make salt. Same with people in relationships.

[trywait]

and u either got chemistry or you don't! the spark is there or isn't. but chemistry alone is not enough to make a relationship work.

[LJay]

I think being blind and having a long tongue are good starts.

[Jake]

Hmmm well I should let Alex respond to that because, Alex was my dream boy physically speaking, and I was his dream come true psychologically speaking and financially of course, not that he was a gold digger (because if that was what he was after) he never knew I was rich after almost a year of dating. I know how to keep low profile. But Alex wasn't much into black guys, he didn't hate or dislike them but it was not its first choice, but this black dude got to its mind and I believe that's what got him hooked, and while I was all about his appearance, i've discovered the most sweetest guy, fragile, emotive - all that I wasn't.

But I invite Alex to let you know more when he logs in next time, but right now his head is on my laps (yes he had his feet on my laps not so long ago lol) and right now he's too comfortable to raise his little finger lol. How do I write on my computer? Well I am on my Mac with a tiny wireless keyboard on his torso, and the laptop is connected to a large screen TV lol... I cannot move he's too beautiful and comfortable right now