Out in the closet...

[verysimple]

When I was 17 I came out to myself... That was then when I was super excited to tell everyone, Yet; who should I tell?
Hell I live in effin Jordan. An Arab, Islamic based country. Where homos are of no show, and you would be abandoned by literally everyone! Family, friends, locals... LGBT in Jordan is like Gay rights in the Us back in 1950 or even further back than that. You would definitely get verbally abused (Physically in some circumstances). You get no job opportunities, Reputation thrown to dirt.
It is that bad and even worse. Hence No one knows about me, Only some very VERY few close friends of mine... So if you decide on not be "Hercules" and tell the world. You are condemned to face the utter suffocation of not being yourself and holding the hand of the man of your dreams in front of the world and expectations from families and friends to have a GF or better yet "get married" *awkward*

Yep, we usually come out of our own closet, but I came out in the closet of my country...

Now if you were in my shoes, what would you do?

[Virge]

At your age under those conditions I'd do the same as you have done in order to survive.

Then in a few years.....
You make it clear that if people there find out you are gay family, friends and all others will abandon you. If it was me in your shoes I would abandon them before they had a chance to do it to me. I'd leave the country without them knowing anything in order to have a more complete and free life.

EDIT
I thought about this while I was out jogging.
Knowing what I do of the unrest in your area of the globe and the homophobia I'd be putting together a plan (very quietly) to leave there as soon as possible.

[Maverick]

I would start making plans to leave that country as well. How you leave and who you tell would need to be carefully worked out. You will never feel free to be yourself if you stay, and over time it will wear you down....

[verysimple]

At your age under those conditions I'd do the same as you have done in order to survive.

Then in a few years.....
You make it clear that if people there find out you are gay family, friends and all others will abandon you. If it was me in your shoes I would abandon them before they had a chance to do it to me. I'd leave the country without them knowing anything in order to have a more complete and free life.

Yes dear, That I have been working on. It is a major but on of many reasons for me to leave out of Jordan... I am not abandoning anyone Yet I feel like a foreigner in my own home. In a way i am used to it and don't care anymore but I also want to kiss the man that I want without having to worry about strange reactions from people around me, when you know you feel safer and have more rights in another country that's when you know your home country isn't truly your home. That's when you know your heart belongs somewhere else.

Being Gay really isn't for sissies... It takes a strong solid man to be gay. Cuz in general gay life is tough!

[verysimple]

I would start making plans to leave that country as well. How you leave and who you tell would need to be carefully worked out. You will never feel free to be yourself if you stay, and over time it will wear you down....

Yepp.. I already have anticipated that my friend. Jordan sux anyways haha. I know that nomatter how hard it gets out there it can't be as bad as it is in an anti gay country.. To be denied by your own society and your own people is the worst thing there is.

[CellarDweller]

I am glad that you are super excited that you are gay, but I can only echo what has been told to you here, which you already seem to understand.

Start saving as much money as you can, and when it's possible, leave Jordan. You won't be free or safe until you do.

[matty7]

congratulations for telling your very good friends, they must be special people - personally for me though I would only dare leave it at that, im not brave enough to risk violent attacks for the rest of my life or even worse ..death, all for just been gay, if your family are going to shun you and you wont get employment then like CellarDweller - save up and leave for a safer place if you want to be truly yourself

[verysimple]

I am glad that you are super excited that you are gay, but I can only echo what has been told to you here, which you already seem to understand.

Start saving as much money as you can, and when it's possible, leave Jordan. You won't be free or safe until you do.

thank you for your advice, yes i will be working on that! my friend.

[Borg69]

Swing by Lebanon and take Bluestar with you... he's in your same shoes and needs rescued too.

[BlueStar]

Swing by Lebanon and take Bluestar with you... he's in your same shoes and needs rescued too.

Thank you for pointing me out. Actually Jordan and Lebanon are almost equal regarding LGBT rights sullied.

So VerySimple, what you think about to save yourself and escape is exactly what I'm thinking about... Or so I guess. Save money and leave this country ASAP, and it would be even safer if you never came out to your family.