No advice sought as such - this is a rant

[cestmoi77]

So I met a guy online and hadn't yet met in person but we had seemed to get on.

BUT this morning he messages me going "mmmmm hi, I thought I should tell you that I've met someone and well, basically, bye" Am paraphrasing the last bit. He did preface it with "I feel I should be honest with you, sorry to disappoint you" I suppose but even so.

I don't know why I'm so upset given that we never met in person but I kind of am. Am sick of this dating crap - if they're not telling me I'm not their type, they're telling me the slightly less polite version of that, or crap like this happens. For fuck's sake.

[LJay]

Try to look at it this way. You are using a lot less time and energy dealing with these guys online than in person. Sure, it is frustrating, but even more so when you go to all the trouble to meet someone and find out the same thing.

[yousir]

This shit happens A lot.

Recently I got talking to a guy who was all "we have similar energies" and "we resonate well".
Then he went silent for a few weeks. Then messaged me again saying he wanted to pick up the chat. Then he explained why he went silent... "i dont go knocking on others mens doors when im seeing someone". so I thought he was saying he was single again. Not the case. Still seeing soneone, and he was all surprised that I didnt want to meet as mates. Im on a DATING site for a reason.

Another guy was all into me on Sunday, texting.
Monday he wanted to chat on the phone. We agreed to meet on Saturday.
Tuesday he wanted to swap (normal, decent) pictures on snapchat.
Wednesday, silence.
Thursday, silence.
Friday i text and ask if we are still meeting on Saturday He claims he has his friends birthday that he forgot about on Saturday.
Never heard from him again.

I think what we need to realise is that, while some guy is talking to us, life still goes on. They have no staying power and get bored easily, OR something better comes along.

[matty7]

Hope you feel better now for putting your rant down in writing cestmoi77, he may have been genuine with his reason but I guess your better off finding out now before you make any commitment....hope you find a better guy next time mate

[catshello]

Glad its off your chest, their loss you know that. This will not matter in two weeks, let alone two years.

[Dattiv]

Wow, I thought this happens only to me. I guess I'm not the only one. Online dating is quite fickle isn't it? I don't have a lot of experience, but find it more so with dating men. I agree it's better to find out now than when you actually meet. It's surely their loss though. Most of the time chatting online and meeting in person are completely different. You miss a lot of the non-verbal cues and the nuance in conversation.

[yousir]

Try doing it for 6years and still having no luck finding something long term.

[Rareboy]

Turn off the app.

Go outside. Go meet actual men.

[yousir]

Turn off the app.

Go outside. Go meet actual men.

Ohh the sweet arrogance of assumptions.

[Bhp91126]

I'm sorry this didn't work out for you, because it seems you found a really good guy. He had the decency to say good bye, told you why instead of

Stringing you along for some more time or just disappearing without a word.

Tell him that you wish him well and that he should get in touch if it doesn't work out with the other guy.