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urgent advice
#1
hey there ..

i'm from the middle east , when i was 13 i met a boy in my school , we became friends he also lives in my neighborhood so we go to school in the bus together .. in the summer we became really good friends we would always go out play together and hang out with each other alot in his house or mine .. and we used to chat ALOT on MSN . we'd return from school and start chatting till we sleep and wake up and do the same thing all over again .
i have a lot of friends and cousins who i hang out with all the time but him ,, let's call him X .
but X was different we just loved hanging out together and spending time together .. so in that year i had to travel to another country i wasn't thinking about what will happen to X , when i arrived there we started chatting and he told he was so sad that i left and he's not going out and he cries sometimes! i was surprised i didn't see this coming so i started to tell him its okay i'll be back and talked him through it .. when i came back our relationship became even stronger and we watch soccer games together , so one day he was at my place watching a game in the break we went to my room .. we were lying next to each other -we used to play some physical games but not sexual - .. out of the blue we found each other making out! and boy what a great feeling it was .
so that's when it started, our relationship stayed strong and we still do the same things but we do more now! .. so when he asks me to come to his place we'd do things and on the other hand i do tell him to come by if my place was empty .. after that we started fighting everyday and at the end of the day we'd be back to normal and even when we are fighting i would just come down to his place to fight and end up making out(love) .
when was like this for almost 4 years .. we grew up and i passed the high school but he did not! .. so he's an american so before 2 months he went to the US .. i was devastated and so bummed about him leaving i'd cry for hours .. and for him it was the same thing.
i didn't take it anymore and sent him a massage telling him "X i love you .. not love between normal friends but love between couple and a just want to be with you all the time , i dont know about you but i dont care about anyone i just want to tell what's in my heart and this is me i dont care about the consequences of this"
he started telling that this is wrong and he does'nt feel the same way and we can't be like this and things like this .. i know he wants to have a relationship with .. BUT what's the kind of this relationship thats the thing i dont know !!! i would appreciate some help here .. this is my first time ever writing something like this in my life and i just registered under a fake name and email so please help
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#2
sam Wrote:he started telling that this is wrong and he does'nt feel the same way and we can't be like this and things like this ..

I know he wants to have a relationship with .. BUT what's the kind of this relationship thats the thing i dont know !!! i would appreciate some help here .. this is my first time ever writing something like this in my life and i just registered under a fake name and email so please help

You can't make him have a relationship with you if he said no.

Men experiment with their close friends all the time.

The fact that you guys..
Hug, and Kiss, and roll around naked and fondle and sleep together and exchange hand jobs and fallatio and such does not make him gay.

It just means you are...!!

GOT Ya !!!
I'm kidding. .

Seriously. .
Do you want to wait around for a closeted guy?
He has to work out his sexuality on his own terms..

Till then..

You have to do what's best for you..

Start dating black guys!

GOT YOU AGAIN.!!. lol
Kidding about black guys.. (Kinda)

Seriously. .
You can't plan on dating a guy that thinks 2 guys together is wrong.
So there you have it..

You should probably invest in a vibrator or a fleshlight. .?
KIDDING!!
Got you again..!!
You make it so easy..

I am on fire!!
Reply

#3
okay thanks for your jokes you scared me a lil .. LOL
here's the thing .. i dont know what i am .. i am ONLY attracted to him .. not to other guy in the whole world can turn me on except him .. actually he's my best friend but i have another one .. he caused fights between us and X got jealous from him .. the other guy is more handsome than X and hotter and our relationship is VERY CLOSE but nothing sexual . . so ?
Reply

#4
Sounds like me he helped opened the doors to you being somewhat gayish. I would take things slow right now and just stay his friend if you feel you can handle that, But in the meantime i would take this time to find out what you like romantically and sexually. But as for now i would just say your kinda bicurious well that is if you like females
I am the angles that hold and surround you

I am the demon you're afraid to meet
Reply

#5
sam Wrote:okay thanks for your jokes you scared me a lil .. LOL
here's the thing .. i dont know what i am .. i am ONLY attracted to him .. not to other guy in the whole world can turn me on except him .. actually he's my best friend but i have another one .. he caused fights between us and X got jealous from him .. the other guy is more handsome than X and hotter and our relationship is VERY CLOSE but nothing sexual . . so ?
So...
If you are a man that wants a relationship with another man..
Including the only one male you are attracted to..
That means you are gay or bi..

But enough about labels. .
Labels are stupid sometimes.

You still have an issue..
You are not sure he wants to be with you.. he thinks it's wrong..

Jealousy can stem from just about anything in an unsecured mind..
Yes ..that shows he has special feelings for you..
But..
Does he want to be with you?
That is where you two will struggle ..
Reply

#6
i do like females and turned on by them .. but never in a real relationship with a girl
.. you guys must know my society is closed on those things i live in the middle east .. if you tell me go date another guy i'll tell if someone knew that there's this kind of relationship between me and X i really dont know what will happen but i can assure you it wont be good
Reply

#7
i think he's scared to say it .. he's scared from his family scared from the society scared from himself .. i had the same fear but even though i told him what i feel ,he even can't tell me!
i really love him i love him a lot and i know he loves me too even though he's in the US we talk everyday and for hours every time i bring up this issue he tries to change the subject and telling me i like us the way we are
Reply

#8
Sam..
You have to respect his wishes.

If he is complicating your life by telling you he wants to be friends only .. but treats you as if you are his boyfriend..
That is not fair to you..

Codependency. .

Most girls -except- Moms and lesbians or bi girls are scary. .

Vaginas have teeth!!
Reply

#9
okay it's not fair to me i know but what should i do .. just leave him ?
and by (the way we are) i really dont know what we are and he doesn't !
Reply

#10
sam Wrote:okay it's not fair to me i know but what should i do .. just leave him ?
and by (the way we are) i really dont know what we are and he doesn't !
You have no choice ..
"Leave him" ?
He's not your boyfriend Sam..
You have to move on..

Leave things exactly the way they are with boundaries. .

It's such an awful thing to go through. .
I understand. .
But..
You can't wait till he decides that he wants to be with you...

Don't let him string you on either...
Reply



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