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I was reviewing the past year, I have been on 6 dates. At the beginning of the year I got chatting to a local older guy, he has his own place, great, so we meet for a coffee, we get on well and meet for another date, it goes well again, conversation flows and then when we say goodbye he says we will do it again soon and sure enough on our third date we go for a coffee and fine ok its fine! then a few days later he texts would I like to go for a coffee, I never text him again.. a few months later I get chatting to another local guy, he says he has a boat, awesome, he asks me if I want to go for a coffee, we go for coffee, he doesn't have a boat, he used to, now he is living in a small caravan in his friends barn but date goes well, he's okay.. then a few days later he wants to meet for a coffee again, I dont know why but I didnt text him again.. then I met nobody for 6 months and recently chat to a guy and we meet for a coffee, in one of the same cafes of previous date, the guy is really nice, on another table this teenage boy keeps looking over with a stupid look on his face, like a disapproving look, after the coffee we go for a walk and say goodbye, a few days later he text to ask if I want to go for a coffee, I say yes and he calls to confirm an hour beforehand and I text back saying I'm too tired and that's it, I can't be bothered with it, all I want is a god damn cuddle, I've been lying in bed for two hours feeling acute loneliness, tomorro I am meeting a different guy for a coffee.. I can't sleep because of it. I'm not looking forward to it, in fact I might not go. Despite how lonely I feel. Funny isn't it.
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No wonder you can't sleep with all that coffee. Sounds like you need to try taking a step beyond hanging out at the coffee shop. Ask if you can get together to watch a movie or just hang out at home.
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People don't say what they really want. Why not tell someone you're having coffee with that what you REALLY want is a cuddle? I can totally relate to that. I'm sure a lot of men can.
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Yeah, man, what Jay said. Way too much coffee
Skip the coffee and do a movie night, or hell even dinner and a walk in the park
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MikeW Wrote:People don't say what they really want. Why not tell someone you're having coffee with that what you REALLY want is a cuddle? I can totally relate to that. I'm sure a lot of men can.
I am quite shy and I am passive, I like a man to take the lead in a traditional way, sure they open the door for me and pay for the coffee. That guy at the start of the year screwed me up, he knew I wanted a cuddle
Thanks for the replies, its hard to explain I think I just have bad luck meeting timid men
I'm so fucking tired of dating and coffee shops,,. I do like eating food too, I actually NEED to do that. Most of those dates I was hungry because I get nervous meeting people and don't eat much beforehand but no I get drunk on coffee
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MikeW Wrote:People don't say what they really want. Why not tell someone you're having coffee with that what you REALLY want is a cuddle? I can totally relate to that. I'm sure a lot of men can.
I am quite shy and I am passive, I like a man to take the lead in a traditional way, sure they open the door for me and pay for the coffee. That guy at the start of the year screwed me up, he knew I wanted a cuddle
Thanks for the replies, its hard to explain I think I just have bad luck meeting timid men
I'm so fucking tired of dating and coffee shops, the same coffee shops in the same town, my shit town,. I do like eating food too, I actually NEED to do that. Most of those
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It would be nice if this forum allowed me to quote more than one person. Every time I try it takes me back to MikeW post, that's so stupid.
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Gideon Wrote:Yeah, man, what Jay said. Way too much coffee
Skip the coffee and do a movie night, or hell even dinner and a walk in the park
We had walks in the park, I'm fed up with that too. Dinner and a movie would be lovely
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It sounds like you take from but rarely give back. Everyone pays your tab the most notable things about the guys you dated were a house and a invisible boat and even though these guys are moving at their own speeds you complain they dont do all the work in initiation and cuddle you though you yourself are too shy to ask. It sounds like you met several guys that may really like you but you have shades on and cant see it, dont blame them if your too shy to ask for a cuddle you may very intimidate them!
Im not trying to be rude just pointing out what ive seen from your OP.
Try giving back to the relationship, show interest and if you want/dont want something TELL THEM, not all guys are mind readers and if I offered a date to you I too may suggest coffee because I wouldn't know you are sick of it.
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You had some expectations. They didn't fulfill it. You got disappointed and refused to give another chance. If you're sick of coffee dates, walk in the park, then suggest some other activities. This is not about bad luck. It's almost like you're expecting people to read your mind with the excuse that you're shy and passive. Expectation will almost always lead to disappointment. Especially an irrational one like this.
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