Is it OK to be absorbed into an activity and ignore your partner

[sethmachine]

I'm the kind of person who gets absorbed into activities. This includes hobbies like video games, reading, browsing the web, catching up on the news (France attack and Turkey Coup!)

It also includes work too. Probably why I'm able to have a good work ethic. I work a full time day job, and also do part time contract work for a start up at home.

When I get into any of these activities, I often like to be left alone so I can focus 100% on them.

When my partner tries to ask me questions or otherwise "pulls" me out of the activity, I'm very often irritated and difficult. I will ignore them or have quick snappy replies.

Is this NORMAL or do I need to learn to easily socialize with people while I'm doing something?

[InbetweenDreams]

I would say it is probably normal...but that doesn't mean you shouldn't try to make some compromises with your partner...or people in general. People will distract you, no matter who it is... That being said I am occasionally guilty myself of not wanting to be bothered, I do like to have me time. You just need to not get upset every time someone distracts you from a book or video game, or perhaps you can turn catching up on the news to something you do with your partner...assuming he has any interest in the current news.

Focus on some ideas that will keep you from getting irritated, whether it is avoiding the activity or changing how you do such activities. I know that's kind of a blanket to it all but my suggestions may not be what will work for you...

[Darius]

It's normal for you to get absorbed in your activities but that doesn't make it right to snap at your partner. The first is just intense concentration, the second is just rudeness.

[Cobalt]

I get lost in my own world frequently. My guy gets that about me. If I'm a dick to him, that's never okay. And he lets me know it.

So yes, totally fine to get lost in your own little world. Not cool to be a dick, ever.

[TwisttheLeaf]

Yes, it's okay to be absorbed in an activity, even to the point of the rest of the world fading away....

In moderation.

It's not okay to be a dick to others. I know their interruptions can be frustrating to your focus, but it's still not okay.

[Camfer]

[LJay]

You could try making an arrangement with your partner, like when you are reading in your room or a certain corner of the house, he should wait to ask you things. In other words, set zones to signal that you want to be left alone. Then work on dealing with minor interruptions. It takes a little practice, but you can learn the technique.