11-28-2009, 06:03 PM
Erm, This is a little awkward. I don't really do to much of this, but I'm going to be writing a series of poems on my life. Called (so creatively) My Life. I just want to get this all out and off of my chest.
I didn't feel this way at first the beginning was so easy, I just left
But now I feel like I need you I cry so hard it takes away my breath
I push myself farther and farther away hoping that one day I won't need you
You see you were my drug and I was yours but there was a difference: I didn't beat you
I stood there and took it choking back tears until I fell down then I curled up
All I would say was stop with bruises forming, a whisper, feelings numb and closed up
After a while you would get tired and leave and I would wonder about my wrong
What did I do? What did I say? Then I would cry all night long
In the morning you would say "I love you" like nothing happened at all
I knew if anyone asked to say I just took a fall
I pleased you, made you laugh, cooked dinner and lunch
We would go pretty long without me ever feeling a punch
But then one little thing would set you off
And then I'd get it again like it got you off
When I finally got fed up I left nonchalantly
Your demons came back as you started your destruction and ranting
I ran out and to a friends and cried forever tears of fear
Would dream horrible nightmares because I knew you were so near
Nobody really believed me because I lied about it so well
I would purposefully drop dishes at work, act like I slipped and fell
I was a klutz and an airhead to my closest friends, they didn't know
And I kept my terror behind a smile refusing to let it show
But now I feel like I need you I cry so hard it takes away my breath
I push myself farther and farther away hoping that one day I won't need you
You see you were my drug and I was yours but there was a difference: I didn't beat you
I stood there and took it choking back tears until I fell down then I curled up
All I would say was stop with bruises forming, a whisper, feelings numb and closed up
After a while you would get tired and leave and I would wonder about my wrong
What did I do? What did I say? Then I would cry all night long
In the morning you would say "I love you" like nothing happened at all
I knew if anyone asked to say I just took a fall
I pleased you, made you laugh, cooked dinner and lunch
We would go pretty long without me ever feeling a punch
But then one little thing would set you off
And then I'd get it again like it got you off
When I finally got fed up I left nonchalantly
Your demons came back as you started your destruction and ranting
I ran out and to a friends and cried forever tears of fear
Would dream horrible nightmares because I knew you were so near
Nobody really believed me because I lied about it so well
I would purposefully drop dishes at work, act like I slipped and fell
I was a klutz and an airhead to my closest friends, they didn't know
And I kept my terror behind a smile refusing to let it show