very confused, need advice

[johno doe]

thanks for your great response guys. also sorry for not being too politically correct original post, theres no hate in what i say. However I did leave a couple of things out ( unintentionally).

-the first is that once i tried on a pair of my mates sisters undies while I was sleeping in her room. At the time I was on a lot of drugs. His sister is smoking hot. what does this mean?

- This is probably for the psychology forum but i want to know what you guys think. I had a dream last night where one of my female friends that i fancy was straddling me. We started to hook up but when we stopped it was actually a guy I was kissing (bit of a turn off). also I have had dreams in which some of my friends who I think might be gay have proposed we have sex. when i decline they just get more and more aggressive and I end up having to out run them. I can't remember all the dreams that involve gay things but there are more.

also I wonder if anyone could give me their opinion on homosexual ocd. I'm not allowed to post links but there is alot of information on brainphysics.com. I have had bouts of ocd like behaviour as has my brother. If I am not gay would this make sense. If so I would probably need to see a therapist to help treat it.

once again thank you for all your help.

[Rychard the Lionheart]

Hi. Johno Doe.

On reading your post I would say you are straight and you are feeling paranoid about you could be gay, which could be caused by the affect of the drugs on the brain. The only evidence you have shown for being gay are making some comments when using drugs and some dreams, are these also related to the drugs? I would suggest you investigate the harm the drugs could be doing to your brain and your perception of these events. Drugs do affect people it different ways, many do suffer acute paranoia when taking drugs. By staying away from the drugs may help get rid of your unwanted feelings.

[luke35]

I agree with the Lionheart, you seem to be straight but terrified of the 'idea' that you 'might' find yourself attracted to a man.

In my experience it;s this fear fuelled by the use of the term 'gay' ("thats so gay" usually used to point out that something is weak or flawed in some way. This term is quite acceptable in schools, work and the mainstream media) by young heterosexual people as a derogotary term that informs most homophobia. If you are straight and grew up hearing people use the term "gay" as the ultimate put down then dreams about being atracted to men might end up being nightmares.

I'm currently living in Thailand and it's a great testing ground for homophobia and sexual paranioa. The more attractive and feminine a ladyboy is the more you will see homophobic guys hackles go up. It's not that they hate ladyboys it's that they fear they might like them.

Although I'm not suggesting that the OP is a homophobic nutter.

I grew up with the idea that weed was a beautiful drug that boosted creativity but in the end it turned me into a paranoid freak. I have a friend who got schizophrenia from smoking hash. He is straight but tortured by voices that taunt him for being gay.

Weed is crap and really pschoactive, not some blessing from Jah that turns us all into Bob Marley.

Saying that I still think it should be legalised.

[marshlander]

... -the first is that once i tried on a pair of my mates sisters undies while I was sleeping in her room. At the time I was on a lot of drugs. His sister is smoking hot. what does this mean?

Almost certainly nothing in this context!

... I had a dream last night where one of my female friends that i fancy was straddling me. We started to hook up but when we stopped it was actually a guy I was kissing (bit of a turn off). also I have had dreams in which some of my friends who I think might be gay have proposed we have sex. when i decline they just get more and more aggressive and I end up having to out run them...

Dreams can offer insight into what concerns us. Your reaction to the situation in your dream seems to indicate that you are not gay and not really into gay sex. I cannot recall that I have ever had an erotic dream featuring females, even though I was married for decades :redface:

[Amigo]

Weed is crap and really pschoactive, not some blessing from Jah that turns us all into Bob Marley.

Saying that I still think it should be legalised.

Thank you.

And that's why "ALWAYS read until the last line before shooting out a comment."

[Amigo]

Hey, John Doe dude,

Do you WANT to be gay or not?

[Amigo]

The biggest sign that you might be gay, is that you made the post here.

Unless you got hidden agenda...

But if you're serious about what you're asking, the fact that you're asking is the sign you should be looking at, not the comments you read here. Not even this one.

If you're looking for explanations as to why you want to slip on a thong and fuck a guy, you don't need the excuse of being gay.

But if you're looking for explanation as to who you are, then yeah... seriously... ask the question...

[fredv3b]

However I did leave a couple of things out ( unintentionally).

I would echo Marshlander in not reading that much into those. I stick with what I wrote in my original post.

[peterinmalaga]

Why is it these “Can you tell me if I'm gay?” posts always confuse me more than they enlighten me? (This is a rhetorical question ….I think). When I was in denial about my sexuality no argument would have convinced me. And now I am sure of my sexuality I don't need any arguments to confirm it. I do agree that it can be a fluid, changeable and complex thing to define but it actually isn't necessary to define it or label yourself, especially if you aren't sure. For most people the day comes when you know what your are – a bit like a religious revelation (Did I really write that?). Till that day comes, it makes sense to go with the flow and enjoy whatever opportunities come your way.
I doubt if that will help anyone but I think it is the process of working it out for yourself that enables you to find out the answer to the question. And if that process doesn't work for you, I guess you must be in a category or categories of your own.

[fjp999]

Society needs a pigeon hole and lovers need to know the sexuality of their lover but on the whole many of us are a bunch of sexuual transients. Sexualiity is fluid

[COLOR="Purple"]I find this very satisfying and wonder why you believe that you must bend to social pigeonholing?

I have a very good friend who might make you happy. Her nickname is "Lash" and not because she has long eyelashes!

I do think she is in your neck of the woods also... somewhere running a cafe in Asia...

To the OP:

I dont think you are gay at all. Try to relax.[/COLOR]