Fear

[posterpicture]

It 's the first time I have ever confessed my fear, specifically my fear of HIV. I really in an unstable mood now so any suggestion would be very appreciated.

I just got tested for HIV for today, I will know the result by the beginning of February. So this is how it starts. Few days a go, I hooked up with a guy on Grindr. We had sex and I was bottom. Before having sex, we cuddled and made out and I felt a lot of chemistry with him. He claimed to me that he only had sex with 3 people and they were all his ex boy friends. He told me the last one was 3 months ago and he got tested monthly. I believed him so I let my guard down. He wanted to bareback me but I did not let him do that. However, in order for him to get hard, I let him touch his penis around my ass and let it went inside me just a little bit without a condom. Normally, I would not worry but this guy had a lot of precum. Also, he gave me a quick blow job.

So after that night, I was really worry. I made up another account on Grindr and tried to hook up with him again. I asked him "when was the last time?", and he lied to me that "it was 3 months ago." . Then I asked him if he uses condom or bareback. He told me "it depends, if I feel safe with the person I have sex with, I will bareback". That made me freak out because obviously, he was a whore and he had sex with more than just 3 ex boy friends.

So I went to get tested today. The specialist cleared a lot of my misunderstandingabout safe sex and HIV. He let me know that a test will only cover 3 months ago, so that mean if I want to know if I get HIV from this guy, I will have to wait 3 months more to get a test.


Now, I am sitting here, with my arm is still hurt from taking blood. Regret and feel really horrible and scared. I really don't know what to do. I wish I have valued myself more and be more caution.

[toomuch45]

dont feel scared i am here for you and i hope you dont have HIV
you did the right thing taking the test

your gonna come out negative

[JoeyJoJo]

I'm sure you'll be OK. HIV transmission through pre-cum is possible, but not likely.
I've been in your shoes..... but the guy actually came inside me (and, as I later learned, was a major slut).....
I've been tested many times since then, however, and I'm totally clean.

Don't worry.

[azulai]

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I'll listen to any rant or fear, and send you virtual hugs, whatever you need. You are not alone, ok?
You know I admire the hell out of you. I think it's going to be ok. I really do.
J

[Vikta]

Don't freak out too much. Although the probability of you contracting anything is super duper small from doing what you've described, you did right by getting tested. Use the fear you now feel to stay safe in the future. I'm certain you'll be fine mile:

[marshlander]

Well done for going to get tested. Too many men can't face up to the prospect of doing that and prefer not to know their status. You will have to retest, but you did the right thing.

Best wishes to you.

[DarkDaisuke]

Aw dont be scared Seriously I bet its nothing to worry about

[FieryJoker!!!]

I think it has shown how strong you are by going to get the test. You have more guts than I do, I'll keep my fingers crossed for you and I know you'll be fine

[posterpicture]

Thank you every one. I really appreciate it. I am not that strong person at all. I wish I could have been a stronger person who could say "No" when thing turned ugly.

[OrphanPip]

It's too early for anything to show up in a test though, you should go get tested again in a few months. Regular testing is a good idea anyway, it's the responsible thing and it's always better to know, there's no downside to testing. A measurable level of circulating IgG antibodies can take as long as 2 months to develop with HIV.