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Monogamous/Open ???
#1
hey there, I'm just curious of what you guys think of open and monogamous relationships..*

I'm currently dating an older man who from the get-go seemed to want an open relationship but decided to be monogamous because it's what I wanted. I personally can't picture myself in an open relationship but i've been thinking about it alot recently because I want to make him happier since that's what he prefers.. he's said before I don't understand because of my age and because this is my first gay relationship, he's probably right but he hasn't done anything to make me 'understand'. so I just need someone else's opinion on this. are you happy with your open relationship?
-Mike
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#2
My relationship is "open" in that in that neither I nor my partner demands that the other is sexually monogamous. However, it is my choice to be monogamous as it is his to choose only to be with me. If you decide to go for the open relationship I would suggest that you are sure that it is something you want too and not just a means of keeping your partner sweet. My understanding is that for this to work there ought to be some conditions understood and agreed by both parties, whether that means doing what you want, when you want with whoever and keeping quiet about it or inviting a third person into your bed who must be agreed by both of you.

I think "open" is probably the key word - transparent and lots of talking, I suspect.
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#3
I wouldn't encourage it if you are the type to get jealous easily. I personally have no problem with it as long as my partner is open and honest and safe about it. (honestly, I'd probably enjoy it as a form of foreplay if he described some of his other encounters to me before we got hot and heavy.) Regular STD testing and condom use is of course an essential part of an open relationship, both with each other and with other partners, and I always maintain the standard that I really don't care too much what my partner does outside the relationship as long as he's open about it, he's safe, and he's able to keep me satisfied, cuz I'll be damned if I'm not his number one sexual priority.
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#4
My man and I are in a semi monogamous relationship as i have no problem if he wishes to play out side of US as long as i know the person , give my permission, and i am there when he plays.
I would never play with anyone but him.
I also know he will not play with anyone else because he knows he has the best, most phenomenal, most phantasmagorical man on this planet.
if it is your thing to play around and you need to have many sexual partners go for it .....you may ask my partner or my self if you like rejection!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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#5
Mr. Not So Lonely Wrote:My man and I are in a semi monogamous relationship as i have no problem if he wishes to play out side of US as long as i know the person , give my permission, and i am there when he plays.
I would never play with anyone but him.
I also know he will not play with anyone else because he knows he has the best, most phenomenal, most phantasmagorical man on this planet.
if it is your thing to play around and you need to have many sexual partners go for it .....you may ask my partner or my self if you like rejection!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I must agree with Mr. Not So Lonely!
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#6
be careful, open relationships are the best way to get STDs into your relationship.
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#7
I'd be meh to the idea. If we agreed it on being an open relationship, then I'd be ok but I wouldn't do anything. I'm monogamous, and yeah but if it helps keep cheating out, then why the hell not. Too many relationships end up ending because of cheating :/
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#8
thanks alot for all the replies guys!
I just feel like I'm holding him back from something he likes to do.. and I can't fully
trust him because of that.. really hard to explain! lol

DarkDaisuke Wrote:I'd be meh to the idea. If we agreed it on being an open relationship, then I'd be ok but I wouldn't do anything. I'm monogamous, and yeah but if it helps keep cheating out, then why the hell not. Too many relationships end up ending because of cheating :/

I probably wouldn't do anything either but my problem is that I'll most likely get jealous at the fact that he's fooling around with other guys :/
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#9
mikey702 Wrote:my problem is that I'll most likely get jealous at the fact that he's fooling around with other guys :/

Don't feel guilty about getting jealous. I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting to be his only source of sex.
Fred

Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
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