Lube, and Ive noticed that the right position can help. if all goes smoothly it is quite fun. just make sure you relax, if youre all tense and worried, it will hurt. also, make him go slowly, too fast and the muscle goes insane and its unbearably painfull... some guys like that tho.
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Whats the 'right position'? Also, i have no experience in sex so, with tops, do they usually know how to do it with virgins? Im 100% sure i will only do it with someone im in a relationship with who wont try to harm me so i hope who ever he'll be will be gentle. i dont want my ass to bleed hahaha
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lol, the right position is up to you. i found that on my belly with one leg pulled up helps me... you can try using toys tho, experiment to find what feels right to you. If you have an experienced top, tell them to take it easy and they will... my first was gentle, second one seemed to want to rip me apart, i made him stop..
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If it makes any difference...I once had a boyfriend/fuck buddy who had almost 13" and it was almost as thick as a can of beer....it was shocking to even look at and I was surprised when I was able to take it......it even felt good after maybe 20 minutes...but a finger up my ass? OUCH! I never got used to that.
Hope that helps!:biggrin:
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hahaha! dude i didnt even know that a 13 inch dick could be real! Was he your first though? Something that big would just stab through all of my insides haha. But yeah. Damn finger hurt. Plus ive heard stories of people who had anal fissures. main point: I DONT WANT WOUNDS IN MY ASS.
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Strange.. i cant use the quote thing. anyway back to the main topic, i think youve got a good point there. I would imagine that i dick would hurt much more because of its girth but i get what you mean about fingering. I guess i just have to find the kinda guy who knows how to do his thing. That, unfortunately, is an entirely different topic.
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You gotta experiment and see what works for you, use plenty of lube and, yes, try different positions. Main thing though is to relax, it's the most significant thing besides lube with sex and with fingering your ass. :]
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Fingers are way different than penises, they can be hard or rigid and boney, compared to a penis which is softer(even when erect) and more flexible, in general. Make sure to cut your nails, as longer nails can hurt, and do some serious damage!
Even tough fingering can be painful doesn't mean that anal sex will hurt as bad as you think! Of course, their will be the initial pressure and uncomfort during the first few penetrative pushes, but soon after, it should begin to feel amazing! Depending on yourself and your partner, and how relaxed you both are! Drinking an alcoholic beverage, beforehand, will help ease your anxiety, as well!
Personally fingering has always been uncomfortable for me!
Being that you're a virgin and inexperienced, you're probably really tense when you finger yourself. It would help to be in a relaxed mood, use tons of lubrication, and maybe even warm up the lube (Not hot! Just warm!) in the microwave before you initiate fingering to further relax your sphincter muscles. It could also help to wear latex gloves, like doctors use, or even a condom! That equals less friction, and easier insertion!
Start off really slow, and do not force your fingers in abruptly! As if your trying to massage it, begin touching your anus softly in a circular motion until you feel relaxed enough to the point of penetration. Once your in, do what feels right and pleasurable! If you begin to feel pain, ABORT! Wait for a little time, and then start over!
Practice makes perfect! So don't get frustrated with yourself! Once you get more experience, it would help to discover your prostate! There's plenty of info online on how to find and massage your prostate! That will give you instant pleasure and satisfaction, especially once you get more familiar with it!
Fingering is not for everyone, so it might be better to go to your local adult store (or online) and purchase a beginner set of anal toys which are about the same size of your fingers, since you want to maintain your virgin tightness for your first lover!
Good luck!
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fingering HURTS!
