problems performing with one bud but not with others...any ideas?

[guliver10]

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[princealbertofb]

It sounds like he doesn't really turn you on, or you two are already too intimate on other levels, or you are too comfortable with him.... I can only think that's it's got something to do with your psyche. Is he aware that you are having a hard time being hard with him? Or is it just you? Is he putting pressure on you? In what way? What are his demands, if any? Maybe you two should just be friends to hang out and do other stuff? Maybe you could find other ways of pleasing him that don't involve you being hard and topping him (fingering, using a sex toy, rimming...?). Maybe this is only momentary anyway. Have you been doing certain drugs recently, or taking medication? Have you been trying to do it after having exerted yourself too much with someone else before?
Do you find this man attractive? Since you are already getting sex from other sources, what is it that you want out of this sex relationship? Is there anything you do with him that you don't do with your other partners, like drink before you start? Lastly, do you smoke?

[East]

Hey PA! I cant' reply in my messages so I am saying HI here instead! How are you?...and what happened to marsh? I am so sad to see he is gone.

As for the topic...your brain is your biggest sex organ and perhaps something got into your subconscious or even conscious mind that changed the sexual dynamics with you.

It is often a natural progression from sex partner to friend as well which is something else to think about . Perhaps his status with a new boyfriend changed the dynamic somehow as well.

It could be anything really but I suspect the answer is in your brain and you have stated that you have no problem with your other partners and the use of viagra.

[princealbertofb]

Yes, as East says, you've got to question some of the dynamics in your partnership with this particular partner...

[princealbertofb]

[A bit of a hi-jack of the thread here]
Hey, East, nice to have you back. Marsh left when you left and because he had a lot on his plate at the moment and not much time to come onto GS. Maybe this is not forever. I don't know for the moment.

[princealbertofb]

Found this which might explain some of it...
http://sexperienceuk.channel4.com/videos/7253

[guliver10]

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[princealbertofb]

Guliver, then talk to him about it and break down that pressure... In the mean time, I'm sure you can find other ways of pleasuring him and of getting pleasure yourself that doesn't involve having a full erection. Discover those together maybe? It'll spice up your sex life together, won't it?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

hi all, im a bi not out guy, have few bttm partners that i top from time to time, hot intense sessions no problems at all. have one partner with which we r friends also, meaning we also go movies, dinner, we care about each other; he has a bf now but we still meet and have sex; he loves being topped by me, but i start doing well the i go soft and got hard time to come back; he's vers, me too, so we end up doing it anyway
i do viagra with all my partners, and works fantastic. it's just with him that im having trouble...and everytime the performance expectations are putting a lot of pressure on me. any suggestions?

Sweetie, either you have a problem being 'the other man' or you are jealous.

[guliver10]

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