01-04-2011, 10:28 AM
Hello Saus 88,
What you seem to be ignoring is the fact that, 1) he is older than you (our metabolisms change with age, sometimes quicker with some people than with others); 2) overeating is a form of compensation for something deeply unsatisfying; 3) probably, if he is central American, his family history has people who are overweight too, so it could be a family tendency. If you could talk to him and afford the services of a dietician, that would probably be the best way to go about it, but nothing will happen unless he is included mentally and physically in the process. I'm guessing that his not having a job is also working contrarily at his self esteem. There are many factors to take into account. I won't say that you are shallow, and understand your concern because you want your couple to work, but there are probably other issues at hand which are not primarily his overweight,but probably boredom and maybe a mild case of depression. Worry is probably also a contributing factor, even though he may not let on that he's worried. Can you talk about it with this understanding? I'm guessing you are worried too. You seem to be the sole provider and you don't want to be taken advantage of, I can understand that too.
Good luck with the discussion.
What you seem to be ignoring is the fact that, 1) he is older than you (our metabolisms change with age, sometimes quicker with some people than with others); 2) overeating is a form of compensation for something deeply unsatisfying; 3) probably, if he is central American, his family history has people who are overweight too, so it could be a family tendency. If you could talk to him and afford the services of a dietician, that would probably be the best way to go about it, but nothing will happen unless he is included mentally and physically in the process. I'm guessing that his not having a job is also working contrarily at his self esteem. There are many factors to take into account. I won't say that you are shallow, and understand your concern because you want your couple to work, but there are probably other issues at hand which are not primarily his overweight,but probably boredom and maybe a mild case of depression. Worry is probably also a contributing factor, even though he may not let on that he's worried. Can you talk about it with this understanding? I'm guessing you are worried too. You seem to be the sole provider and you don't want to be taken advantage of, I can understand that too.
Good luck with the discussion.
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