I am a virgin

[Virge]

I am 26 and still a virgin. I had a guy throw himself at me when I was like 15 but I never pursued him further. I recently decided I didn't want to be a virgin anymore either. I got tired of waiting for that special someone, I'm also tired of being the only virgin I know of in my friends. One of my friends moved to Dallas within the past year and he constantly sends Grindr conversations between him and his fling and telling us he hooked up with someone last night. So I am trying to get a random hookup and its not really working that well.

I've come up with a new rule for me.

I'm giving no one advice about virginity or whether to lose it with a hook up or wait for some guy on a white horse to ride into the animated story.

I've done a LOT of serious thinking the past few days since 27 y/o Axe let it be known he was a virgin on his thread about having a crush on his straight room mate. Now 26 y/o CuriousPhoenix says he is. So that made me really do some thinking.

The best I can come up with is if a guy makes it that far in life without experiencing sex virginity can't be the problem --- it has to be the symptom of other problems that aren't being talked about. This is about the same as a man having a heart attack asking his doctor to do something to help him change his skin color from blue to normal.

With that out of the way if you guys want to stop talking about the symptoms and deal with the problems maybe some of us can help you.

But that's just the opinion of a dumb loudmouth 26 y/o non virgin. Take it for what it's worth.

[Camfer]

I am 26 and still a virgin.... So I am trying to get a random hookup and its not really working that well.

Not sure if you're looking for advice but if you're in OK City go get yourself a room at the Habana Inn. I've never been but its reputation spans several states!

[meridannight]

there's nothing wrong in wanting to do it with someone special, although i do not understand how a guy can put off sex THAT long just to wait for the special guy. what if it takes another 30 years to meet him? besides, many guys are special and amazing creatures

BUT, being afraid of doing something wrong.....how complicated do you think sex is? really, you already have all the necessary instincts programmed into your genetic code. nature takes over at that moment. at least it SHOULD, unless you overthink it. don't. you don't need to read a manual to do it right. the only thing to keep in mind is to communicate with your partner and keep his needs in mind. and if it's anal sex an adequate cleaning procedure is highly recommended. it's not quantum mechanics.

[Jimmy]

It's your life and your body. You don't have to explain yourself to anyone.

[meridannight]

The best I can come up with is if a guy makes it that far in life without experiencing sex virginity can't be the problem --- it has to be the symptom of other problems that aren't being talked about.

i have to agree with this.

also, there exists this weird notion that losing the virginity has to be something special. i think people need to get rid of this idea in their head because it is completely wrong. it's just the very first time someone has sex. and guess what -- compared with everything that comes after, that first time does not live up to it. it's nothing special, in fact; or at least it is not MORE special than what comes after.

and also, the idea of meeting the special guy -- it is possible to meet for sex only and discover the guy you're with is an amazing man and forming a connection with him then and there. and reverse is true -- you can meet mr. special before sex, and court each other for weeks and think it's all great, but when you finally start having sex he might turn out to be not so special at all and the experience may leave you disappointed.

[Jerpyjorpjerp]

I would say im an okay looking guy, okay body, been hit on by guys and girls and had all the chances i could get but i just didnt do it because i might do things wrong "real life is not a porn movie"... Is it bad that i wanna do it with someone special? But im already 27... Should i just give up my virginity to a random hook up?

I'm a virgin so I can't really say I am an authority on the matter, but as a general rule: Don't let society make your choices for you when it comes to your bodily and emotional health. When it comes to your self, it really needs to come down to what YOU want. Don't feel like you have to sell yourself to other people.

Having sex when you have low self esteem is similar to drinking excessively when depressed. Don't let sex become an escape from your problems.

I may not have any experience when it comes to relationships and sex, but I do know a thing or two about toxic behaviors.

[Bhp91126]

I've come up with a new rule for me.

I'm giving no one advice about virginity or whether to lose it with a hook up or wait for some guy on a white horse to ride into the animated story.

I've done a LOT of serious thinking the past few days since 27 y/o Axe let it be known he was a virgin on his thread about having a crush on his straight room mate. Now 26 y/o CuriousPhoenix says he is. So that made me really do some thinking.

The best I can come up with is if a guy makes it that far in life without experiencing sex virginity can't be the problem --- it has to be the symptom of other problems that aren't being talked about. This is about the same as a man having a heart attack asking his doctor to do something to help him change his skin color from blue to normal.

With that out of the way if you guys want to stop talking about the symptoms and deal with the problems maybe some of us can help you.

But that's just the opinion of a dumb loudmouth 26 y/o non virgin. Take it for what it's worth.

How did you get to be so wise so young? Teach me oh master. I want to be you when I grow up.

I'm blaming abstinence education, no-sex-before-marriage blather, purity-rings, exaggerated std-fears, and of course homophobia for old maids. Sex is good, sex is fun and having sex is natural.

[BlueStar]

Would you mind losing your virginity in public toilets like I did?

[dynamodean]

There's nothing wrong with being a virgin and you shouldn't feel pressured into having sex "just cuz". I would say to shake things up a little bit by attending clubs and organizations with themes and topics that interest you. Hell, join them just to join them and expand your social circles. Get to know people, like them, invite them on dates, and sex will naturally follow.

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Should i just give up my virginity to a random hook up?

That is a question that only you can answer for yourself.