I've been with my husband for four years. We got married in November. We have always had the perfect relationship...but....right before we got married his father passed away and we moved in with his mother... supposedly for a few weeks.... to help out. We have been here for months... which I don't mind...but he is so distant now...we don't ever spend time together and all he does is stay on his laptop and I just play games on my phone. And our sex life...which has always been mind blowing is now almost non existent. We went from having sex 3 times a day to... well...it's been a few weeks now and Nothing....should I be worried he is falling out of love with me? He is truly my everything...and I can't lose him...what should I do?
![[-]](https://gayspeak.com/images/duende_v3_local/collapse.png)
•
Living with the mother is a very bad idea for the relationship...
You need to get out of there....
Tread VERY CAREFULLY...you are dealing with his mother and you have to watch what you say. Alot of mothers can get their claws in and suck the life out of their children while appearing to be a rose on the outside. If they are manipulative...they know what buttons to push and what strings to pull...and what to whisper in their son's ears.
Wives have been struggling with this for centuries...and they often lose the battle when dealing with the mother in law.
Do you get a sense she is using him as a surrogate husband? It is very common when the father passes with some personaity types...
•
Posts: 2,698
Threads: 34
Joined: May 2014
Reputation:
0
Starsign: 
Capricorn
Mood: None
Welcome to the forum.
I duno… how can we help? You're right there with him… and you don't know what's going on?
Why are you still at his mother's?
Why don't you spend time together?
I don't know what to say, really, other than get off your phone, grab his lap top, throw it on the floor, stop on it hard, grab him by the shirt collar, throw him up against the wall, give him a huge deep kiss, look him right in the eye and say, "Fuck, man, I can't STAND this cyber shit no more! I want SEX with YOU, NOW!!
Of course I'm not being serious exactly but I sorta kinda am, too. You two have gotten into a rut and you're going to have to burst out of it if you want to save this relationship.
BUT… it takes two.
Do you ever talk about this shit? What's the deal?
.
•
Yes....and she is the manipulative type...when we do have a second together she yells for him to come talk to her and keeps him for hours...and I'm all alone...I just feel so lonely...we have stayed here so long that it's hard to leave....money wise.... because we spend so much time taking care of her...I feel so lost...we lately speak and I can't even really get him to hold my hand...let alone anything else...and we were always incredibly close....I feel so lost
•
I try to talk to him....but he is always so stressed out and sad....I don't know how to break through...and it's kind of hard to have sex when his mother is right down the hall....
•
And she really does use him....it's like she knows when we have time together and she makes Sure she has him with her while I'm all alone....it's breaking us apart...
•
And it's hard for us to leave here now because of our money situation because of all the time we spend taking care of her...and there isn't anything wrong with her...she uses him to do everything for her....I truly feel she is trying to break us up
•
Couples therapy. Because of the sensitivity of having his mother between the two of you, you need a neutral outsider to negotiate the conversation.
•
Thank you all for taking the time to help....I've never been so sad in my life and I truly feel he regrets marrying me.....it all feels hopeless...but I also have borderline personality disorder...and things kind of get trapped in my head once I notice little things that he's doing....like not spending time with me or holding my hand...or of course sex....
•
