3way.... Relationship!

[BarryAndBryan]

Prince...I do have to disagree with you on that one, respectfully....I do not think..."all" men are not monogamous by nature...it depends on the person....women can be just as sleezy as men can be....if you're going to cheat on someone that is a personal decision and shows who you are...and saying things like...men can't be monogamous...we are wired that way...just perpetuates the stereotypes that are put on all LGBTQ people....

[princealbertofb]

Prince...I do have to disagree with you on that one, respectfully....I do not think..."all" men are not monogamous by nature...it depends on the person....women can be just as sleezy as men can be....if you're going to cheat on someone that is a personal decision and shows who you are...and saying things like...men can't be monogamous...we are wired that way...just perpetuates the stereotypes that are put on all LGBTQ people....

But, as you will note, I did not say ALL men, I just said MEN, IT WOULD SEEM, therefore implying that it's not true for all men... But saying that SOME MEN might indulge in a bit of deception and cheating is not a stereotype... it's a reality. I'm not trying to paint everyone with the same brush. I know, just as you do, that we are also capable of loyalty, but what's to say that SOME MEN can't be loyal to TWO people rather than just ONE, just as we know SOME MEN can be loyal to just ONE person... or maybe LOYAL to a WHOLE BUNCH of people... ? I don't think we can take how WE react to this as having value for everyone else, just on account of them sharing the same material we're made of...

To take this just a little bit further, I think this idea of monogamy is quite an interesting concept, but underlying it is always the idea that we might "sin" in thought rather than "deed"... something the church seems to be fond of...
I'm in a relationship with one person and I'm going to be loyal to that person and that person alone, but I sometimes have fantasies about other men, but I won't engage in any of these fantasies in real life... Am I monogamous, really? Isn't it all a questions of personal timing? In the end we can all have a string of monogamous relationships which last very diverse time lapses in relation to the next relationship. So if I've only had three people in my life but I've still had three relationships, am I monogamous, have I been monogamous?
In this particular instance, this person is asking us if bigamous love is possible? Well, it would seem it is, even if it's not the way most of society is organised... but the number of threeway relationships, or even fourway relationships that have been recorded in time are sufficiently documented to say that men are not (in general, but not as an absolute) naturally monogamous. They can go from one partner to another, sometimes have several partners at the same time (orgies, wifeswapping, threesomes and foursomes etc...).
I don't think I'm being unfair or overgeneralising. Am I ? mile:

[BarryAndBryan]

You are not....and I did not mean to imply that you were....as you said...it is up to each individual how to live their own lives....I personally could not love more than one person at a time relationship wise. It is up to the individual in question. Should I be considered out of date, in a way, because I believe that a relationship should only be with two people? Maybe....and I have been cheated on before, as most people have been...and I could never hurt someone the way that I was hurt. I could just never imagine looking at someone the way that I look at my husband...and if I ever had to watch my husband having sex with someone else, it would kill me....or them...Lol....but I'm not saying it is wrong...just not for me....and in all honesty, those types of relationships rarely ever work. And if you've seen my picture then it should show you that I don't go by what society says...Lol....I can only go by what my heart tells me....

[LJay]

Gather ye rosebuds while ye may.

[Cuddly]

I was thinking about this type of thing a while ago.

Assuming there's no envy, wouldn't 3 (or more!) have a more stable relationship? It allows for individual#1 to take all the elbow space he needs, to deal with whatever, without #2 and #3 getting lonely or feeling neglected, they still have each other. As long as you're all happy, I see no reason why it wouldn't work.

[meridannight]

wouldn't work with me. i'm a one-man type of guy. i don't even like group sex. (but that's beside the point). adding another guy, to me, that dissipates focus and commitment. it's a loss in intensity. i like to focus all my passion and potential on one man, not to divide it and lessen its magnitude. i love that intimacy and privacy i share with my partner. sharing it with a 3rd party feels wrong. i also would no longer feel like it's a relationship, more like a social club. and i'd opt out of that scenario very quick. i would not feel involved in that scenario.

i think the chances such a setup will survive in long term are slim (and 6 months is infancy). but not impossible. certain types of guys can probably pull it off. it's not for me, but doesn't mean it can't work for some people.

[BarryAndBryan]

I totally agree merid... That was my point exactly....it may work for some...I don't really see how....but I could never share my partner....our love is too strong too important to let someone else in between us...---Barry

[Zurdoknoc]

I totally agree wth the relationship all of you are having. Relationships are hard work. Gay relationships are dictated by many other rules. If you guys think and feel this is the right way to go and makes you feel right go for it. My only advice is that everybody has to be clear about feelings and if things start to change in terms if emotions and feelings. There is a posibility someone falls deeper into someone. Could be you on him. Him on you. Your partner on him etc. Just keep the communication line always open and I thinn things should be ok. MAny gay relationships are open in many ways. 3 ways are part of it. But love is a sensitive issue and the 3 of you need to be in the same way. I Beliefe you can make This work and don't feel bad about it. We have been raised by society rules that are too old for the way people are nowadays. Go for it.

[Beaux]

I have seen lots of people try it. I have tried it. It didn't work out for me, and I cannot honestly say that I have seen it succeed often, but I do know of people it has worked for.
Good Luck,
~Beaux

[East]

I definitely think it could work...and at the moment...it sounds like you are all happy in this arrangement so my advice..seize the moment and enjoy yourself....

Of course...there are unique problems that will probably come up that you have to face...but every relationship has issues along the way that they have to deal with...and certainly anything is possible.....

One word of caution!!!!! Sorry...don't want to rain on your parade....BUT...

Sometimes...there is a deeper psychological reason that someone in the triangle is drawn to this relationship...same with people who pursue married people....I don't know if this is the case with you or not but just to warn you ahead of time...

Some people have really bad wounds from being abandoned...or not wanted...in their early years....and so sometimes they are drawn into situations where they can re-create the emotional experience...and then WIN...meaning...they can break someone up and get a "high" from it...and it puts a Band-Aid on the wound they have inside of them...but it never cures it because it is the wrong way to go about it.

This is more common than not...so please be aware of the potential and pay attention. If it does happen...just walk away.... because they can be treacherous.