12-21-2012, 01:49 AM
As should be deduced by the subject line, Iâm a major wuss. Iâve had absolutely zero romantic experiences in my life, with men or women. I took some pretty brutal rejections when I was in high school and have been too timid to try my luck since. Itâs not like Iâm a cowering, blubbering mess when Iâm talking to someone I like either, I just tend to think, âwhy bother? I know what they're going to say.â Itâs loser mentality, which is stupid, I know.
But now thereâs this girl whoâs really interested in me. Iâm not used to that feeling. We met in an English course. Sheâs attractive, way smarter than me, and funny as fuck. We have a lot in common, and sheâs almost as cynical and black hearted as I amâ¦.. Sheâs perfect.
Sheâs got a lot of issues though. Within minutes of the first time we talked she started telling me about how much she cuts herself and about how often sheâs tried to kill herself. Sheâs bipolar and schizophrenic. Sheâs told me that she has a slew of characters that talk to her and who only she can see. Sheâs also mentioned something about a crazy ex-fiancé.
We are about to go on our first date in a few days and I am nervous as a son-of-a-bitch. Apart from dealing with the general nervousness that comes from being so inexperienced, Iâm trying to determine whether this is someone I want to get involved with at all. I donât have any knowledge in this department, so I donât know if my hesitation is warranted, or if Iâm just once again just looking for an excuse to remain alone and safe. Am I over thinking this whole thing? I feel kind of sick.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks
P.S.
She also mentioned a male friend of hers our age whoâs only been with one woman. She talked about this guy with a certain amount of disgust which has given me even greater insecurity. Should this concern me at all?
But now thereâs this girl whoâs really interested in me. Iâm not used to that feeling. We met in an English course. Sheâs attractive, way smarter than me, and funny as fuck. We have a lot in common, and sheâs almost as cynical and black hearted as I amâ¦.. Sheâs perfect.
Sheâs got a lot of issues though. Within minutes of the first time we talked she started telling me about how much she cuts herself and about how often sheâs tried to kill herself. Sheâs bipolar and schizophrenic. Sheâs told me that she has a slew of characters that talk to her and who only she can see. Sheâs also mentioned something about a crazy ex-fiancé.
We are about to go on our first date in a few days and I am nervous as a son-of-a-bitch. Apart from dealing with the general nervousness that comes from being so inexperienced, Iâm trying to determine whether this is someone I want to get involved with at all. I donât have any knowledge in this department, so I donât know if my hesitation is warranted, or if Iâm just once again just looking for an excuse to remain alone and safe. Am I over thinking this whole thing? I feel kind of sick.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated.
Thanks
P.S.
She also mentioned a male friend of hers our age whoâs only been with one woman. She talked about this guy with a certain amount of disgust which has given me even greater insecurity. Should this concern me at all?