depression or not? so so confused?!?!?

[lazyboy]

Okay, I've posted on here about my potentially depressed ex, can see from my past posts. Last night my ex broke up with me for good this time and said he just does not feel the same, does not care about me at all, and feels we will never get back together.
Initially when he broke up with me seven weeks ago he did not have a reason, said there was none to give, and that if there was he would say it as would be much easier. I suggested he may be depressed as lost his job, family problems, gained weight, friends took advantage of him etc and he said ' i don't want to get into that frame of mind' So i could not accept him breaking up with me, I suggested that depression may be the culprit and he did agree somewhat, said everything in life was just dull right now, and needed time. etc. However, then he started going silent, not replying to my texts, no reply for nearly three weeks, starts 'looking to hook up on gaydar' so I got angry and messaged him and he eventually replied to me, said my drama repeatedly asking questions made him not fancy me anymore. why could he not say this to me seven weeks ago? he said i was not the problem and now I am?!?! So i asked him whether depression was a factor in our breakup and he FLIPPED he said he was sick of me asking quesitons and threatened to block me and up to then the conversation had been amicable and he had been answering me until i mentioned depression?! does it seem like he is in denial or am i in denial that he is not depressed?! note that he did not say he is not depressed, he just would not answer and this is the second or third time he won't answer. I sent him an article a day or two before he started ignoring me about depression and loss of love and he flipped at that as well and threatened to block me. WHY IS it so personal to admit he has it? am i being a brat or what? tell me guys, what do you think ???

[Geminize]

I think it's time for you to let go and move on. I know it's not easy but he has made it clear, and the more you push and question him the more resistant and resentful he gets. You have nothing to gain there.

At this point I don't think it matters if there is depression involved. If there is, he is not open to dealing with it. If there isn't, he is not open to a relationship for some other reason. Either way, you are banging your head against a wall and you will only get yourself more hurt if you keep it up.

[HomeagainNYC]

You seem to be in a lot of pain because this man no longer wants your relationship to stay as it was - he wants to move on. I'm sorry for that and how it's affecting you.

It's unmistakable that you feel, if only you can - enlighten - him with your insight, then you might have a chance for reconciliation.

Based on what you have posted here, and previously, he obviously doesn't want you psychological analysis, nor do I blame him, since you're giving the impression of being somewhat obsessive - sorry, but you did mentioned depression - eight times - in this post alone.

It's never easy to be broken up with, but it happens to most.

This seems to be your time; eventually, you're going to accept - he is moving on. The question is how painful are you going to make this on yourself?

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Clearly he wants out. Sorry regardless of the depression or anything else he seems dead set on getting out of the relationship.


Regardless, Instead of being 100% honest and telling you 'Hey you were a great fuck and all, but really I want something else now - have a nice day' - he tried to 'let you down' easily and tried the 'lets be friends' thing which lead to a miscommunication of how he really felt.

20/20 hindsight and your attempting to keep the relationship going and he is finally growing a pair and letting you in on the why and actually making it clear he wants out.

I'm sorry. I really wish guys and gals would say what is on their mind instead of doing the wishy washy 'let be friends' routine. Trust me, its far easier when they say they hate your fucking guts and throw things at you, it is much clearer that there is no hope for the relationship and you know to walk away.

From what you wrote before, I struck it up to lousy life situation/depression. Its more obvious now he just got tired of the relationship and wants a new f-buddy to play with.

for you.