I went to the tri-state area (Indiana, Illinois and Kentucky) to see my boyfriend for spring break. It's been going quite well. The age difference (43 years in this case), despite what some people claim, is not really a factor in the relationship at all because we have a lot of stuff in common.
I'm glad I went.
•
Dating is fine, for now, but marrying him is completely something else. "...in sickness..., until death do us part." Something to think about because that age gap is quite big. It will make a huge difference, sooner than later.
•
Posts: 9,477
Threads: 267
Joined: Apr 2012
Reputation:
2
I'm a : Single Gay Man
Starsign: Scorpio
Mood: None
As long as you are both happy the age gap should not be a problem.
An eye for an eye
•
Are you sure its not a problem?
You seem to bring it up every post about your BF... That feels like this age thing is disturbing you and you are trying to convince yourself its not a problem.
If it wasn't an issue, then you most likely would not be throwing it out there all the time.
•
Sylph sees the point in my asking....
I'm well aware of the autism and OCD type behaviors and stuff.... I was just pointing out that people who tend to fixate and bring up a thing usually have a problem with that thing.
I seriously doubt that Johnny is aware that he has fixated on telling everyone that he has no problem with the age difference... but he has - at least here.
And I doubt he understands how people are going to view his constantly bringing it up.
•
I have gotten some intensely negative feedback (directly and also through people making judgment calls on other intergenerational relationships) about this so I do come here seeking validation, honestly. It's hard not to come here when it feels like the world is against you.
It's an issue in the sense that it invites harsh judgment, which is hard for anyone to deal with.
So yeah, I do understand your perspectives but I think that telling you the full reason why I keep posting about this will help you to understand what's happening here psychologically.
One thing to keep in mind is that I am maturing at a pretty rapid pace and I am much more secure in who I am as a person. I'm a much better version of the guy who joined this forum in July. Keep in mind that I don't react to these sorts of situations in the way that I used to. Instead of fighting fire with fire, I often internalize other people's comments.
•
how do you mean "internalise other peoples comments"
As you know i was with an older guy and it also made me stronger and understand myself better and im pleased it happened.
this proves to you can fall in love and theres lots of guys your age that are too scared to even meet someone, you can keep your options open though.
•