Confused

[Wolfpack]

Hi guys I just want your opinions and advice on my current situation.

Here's the story so far - I met a guy a few weeks a go and we have been on a couple of dates. We have been texting each other regular and that and the dates have both been really great, we have both found each other really attractive , got on really well , are of a similar age and we both want to be exclusive to each other. He even asked to me to be his Boyfriend, told me I am the one for him and was worried that while I was away on holiday that I would find someone else. He calls me sweet names all the while and says he cannot believe how lucky he is to have me in his life. We have texted every day , maybe only a couple of times but neither of us is into heavy texting and we are both fine with this. I really like him and he makes me feel great , the mutual attraction is very strong between us.

Our last date went really well , we both had a good time and making plans about what we both wanted for the future. He was very strongly into me and my only concern is that he might become clingy or needy. The date ended fine and we both texted for a couple of days after , we made plans to meet again ( this is not easy as we live ten miles apart and he sometimes works twelve hour shifts ) earlier this week and he was really excited about this.

But then..........

No messages for two days , so I sent him a text about meeting the evening we had agreed on , but he did not get back to me untill the day after. All I got from him was " have to arrange a later date " so I text back 'ok and ' are you alright ?' he just replied that he was fine, he did not call me a pet name it was just a very matter of fact text.

Not heard from him since , so how have I gone from red hot to cold ?
I have decided not to text him yet as venting my frustration or pushing him for a explanation will of course only push him away. Am I doing right by waiting fo him to get in touch first ?

I really like him and want him to be part of my life, I guess he has just left me feeling very confused and wondering how turn of events has gone from one extreme to the other.

Sorry if this has turned into a rant , just want your always valued and expert opinions.

[Scootaloo]

I wouldn't get on him frequently,maybe give it a few more days and text him again, see if things are warmer. If it continues, let him go.

If he has a real issue I get that you would want to be there for him, but you can't help if your left in the dark.

I'm not the best at dating advice, otherwise I might not be single, but if you get the feeling something isn't right, it's usually true.

[IanSaysHi]

Ahhh Wolfy first of all I am sorry to hear about this frustrating situation! I had the same kind of thing with a guy. Went on dates, he seemed very interested... We'd meet up for lunch and it'd turn into lunch and dinner and drinks and he'd keep insisting on buying dinner for me. Then suddenly - bam - no contact.

I also sent the text asking if all was okay, curt reply, then a week later I passed him in the street I kinda didn't know what to do but he stopped and said sorry for not being in touch, he'd been busy etc. I decided to leave the ball in his court. Didn't hear off him again.

I still don't know what happened. Maybe I ate too much popcorn when we went on our final date at the cinema. Maybe it's because I suck at flirting. I saw him last Christmas at a party, we were both dancing on the dance floor, he kept looking over but I just don't get what he wanted. The whole sudden frostiness thing put me off completely.

Lol I'm not even sure what I'm trying to tell you. It's not really advice as such is it? More like, some guys just seem to do this. *Shrug*. I hope he has just been busy and things pick up again for you.

[TigerLover]

Well I guess it's just a case of wait and see, for all we know something terrible might be happening in his life that's pushed all thoughts of romance aside. Or it could be any one of a thousand other things, I suppose all you can do is try not to dwell on it.

[jimcrackcorn]

There's not much you can do about the situation,,, other than text/call him every couple days and ask how things are going.

He is mature enough to know how to treat people properly,, yet he is not explaining why he has gotten so cold toward you lately. This doesn't reflect well upon his personal behavior, which is an indicator of who he really is. During the first few weeks of dating & talking he was showing you his best side,,, now he is showing you the other side of him that is not so good.

Personally,, I would ask him if he still wants to go on dates with you, or is this budding relationship over. He needs to man-up and be truthful with you instead of leaving you feeling confused.

I sincerely hope you have not been brushed off by someone who isn't mature enough to be honest about his feelings.

Respectfully,
Jim

[blackula88]

It sucks, but all u can do is wait and see. I mean if this goes on over a full week or more with no change... tell the dude ur logging out. When relationships just start ur always on ur best behavior cause u worried anything u do might turn this person away aka txting him to much asking what's wrong.

Just give him his space for now. He could of had a death in the fam or something and didn't want to be emotional around u... not at least this early.

[CellarDweller]

all you can do is give him some space and see what happens.

One question.....you posted:

He was very strongly into me and my only concern is that he might become clingy or needy.

Did you speak to him about this, or did you keep that to yourself?

[Bhp91126]

Man, that sucks, I'm sorry you have to go through this crap.

I'm afraid your Romeo has moved on to a new guy. As fast as he was into you, I think he's fallen for someone else.

Ball is in his court, he might still get back to you, however you are free to roam the countryside again.

[bluedragon]

Maybe your date could have been facing some problems recently. Give him some time. Hopefully, he will get back to you.

Meanwhile, you might want to contact him now and then. Maybe he needs your support.

[Wolfpack]

all you can do is give him some space and see what happens.

One question.....you posted:

He was very strongly into me and my only concern is that he might become clingy or needy.

Did you speak to him about this, or did you keep that to yourself?

I kept this to myself as it was just a thought I had, and to talk to he seemed quite a practical thinker in regards to dating , feelings and relationships.