i think the issue here is not his weight but rather, his procastination about almost everything. in a relationship were your man isn't doing anything at all? he sure will get heavier. but i don't want to tell you to leave him simply because he looks fatter now or is unattractive to you. i say leave him simply because he's lazy and a couch potatoe! but of course, you should talk it out seriously with him first. tell him what's really bothering you and tell him the consequences for it. but again, let me remind you, someone's physical appearance is never acceptable reason to leave someone, ok? i wish you luck my friend...
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i agree... there's no greater exercise than sex... damn, i wish i can find someone who i can exercise with.. i myself am getting fatter by the day too.. hehe
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Forgive me, but your pretty damn shallow mate. My partner is over 400 pounds and I still love him as ever. You need to communicate better, youngin's like yourself need to realize communication takes two. Converse with each other about the other's feelings, work things through and get things through. If you're going to dump him for having a little weight gain, you didn't love him to begin with, you just lusted after him. Another common misconception with young people is the difference between "love" and "Lust".
I agree he should get off his tailside and work a little bit, even if his "job" is to just go to the gym every so often, I agree, he should do something. Weight however should not be the deciding factor in a relationship. He's probably better without you.
If he didn't have you, he'd
1). Have to get off his ass and do things to support himself.
2). Won't have to worry about someone who is discriminate against a little weight.
3). Will probably be able to get over his depression (sounds like he's depressed)
Him not having you will get him to better his own life. Plus he wouldn't have to worry about a shallow person.
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I tend to agree with JoeyJOjo. You seem shallow and too materialistic. Ask yourself what your priorities really are. He gained 15 pounds? No need to be alarmed. Seems he is in a country where language is a barrier. Why bring someone you love into that scenario? I don't get it. It sounds you are the problem and not totally him. He is at fault in that he's not done a lot to remedy the situation but you are more at fault for allowing this to happen. Sorry! One last thing. If you truly love this man a little weight gain depression and lack of trying will not change it. What He is experiencing needs some spiritual support and no it does not start in the bedroom. There's a lot of support on this thread so if you want to spend the rest of your life with this man I suggest you follow some of the advice given. I wish you many years of joy and prosperity but only you can make that possible.
Just read the opening post to the thread. Boy did I misunderstand some things in it. I understood that He was moving to a country where He could not understand the language. I musta been real tired earlier today when I read it. So sorry. Please forgive some of the opinion above. Cheers
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really borrein? over 400 lbs? wow... i like that..... someone who likes the big curves..hehe
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I think that simply dismissing this guy as being "shallow" is unfair. Unconditional love is rare and love in general is completely idealized. This guy is being extremely honest with himself and his partner and that puts him ahead of the game......way ahead...
How many people have had a problem with their mate because they didn't like "this" or "that" change and decided to cheat on them or leave them because of it? Are they all shallow as well?
We all have dealbreakers.
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@The_Virgin: Yes, I'm dead serious, over 400 pounds. Granted I'm about 300 some odd pounds myself in a chub4chub relationship, but still. It just angers me that someone just gains a wee little bit of weight, not much to really speak of honestly, and all of a sudden "BAM" breakup material. WTF is wrong with the youth of the world these days?
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but we don't want to be judged based on pure physical appearance alone, right? you can't expect your lover to go break up with you once you grow wrinkles of your forehead simply because he is not fond of old men.....?
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