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How does he behave if you try to give him just a hug and a cuddle, nothing sexual?
Fred
Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans.
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Er, Donovan, I can respect the fact that it's his body and that he doesn't like to be touched, but in that case, with you needing more touch and more hugs and bodily contact, it's not a relationship that works that well. I don't know how much you've discussed this with him, but maybe he
is loathing of being touched goes deep down to some childhood trauma, which he might be having trouble negociating as an adult.
You two might benefit from some therapy. Is that a possibility? Otherwise, if it can't be negociated or discussed, then it might just be selfishness or manipulativeness. I wouldn't like to judge before knowing the facts. Some people are not touchy, it's true, and need their personal space, which doesn't make them nasty people, of course. But if you are the cuddly type, it's either a question of finding a compromise together or you going to look elsewhere. It's getting to a point now, since you are discussing it openly with strangers (us) that it's becoming a major obstacle to your life together. I think he needs to hear that. If he prefers to jerk off, well maybe he would be happier being on his own (I'm just exaggerating the score, so you can see where I'm coming from). In a relationship, if both don't try to make it work, it eventually breaks down.
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