Horribly Humiliating. I'm Losing Faith with People.

[dfiant]

Jay is doing well and is resting in hospital after his surgery. He will be in hospital until at least Monday and is so grateful for everyones messages and kind thoughts. He is very humbled by the attention and can't wait to get back home.

[dfiant]

More news directly from Jay. Within the last couple of hours he has had the remaining tubes removed from his abdomen and his surgeon is happy with his recovery progress and has been told that he will be able to leave the hospital this afternoon.

He will be spending time at home with his parents as he continues to recover.

He is excited about going home and will get his chance shortly to thank you all for having him in his thoughts.

[CellarDweller]

Fantastic! Thanks so much for passing this along!

Continued speedy recovery, Jay!

[Bowyn Aerrow]

Good News. This is days before previous predictions. He must be a faster healer than the doctors thought.

[dfiant]

indeed it is, i'm excited for him

[Pix]

Hope you're feeling better soon, Jay. mile:

[Inchante]

That is good to hear. I'm glad jay is recovering so well.

[Kyle]

I read your story fully and I have to say I feel so sorry for that.
Chris seems to be such a jerk. He read your letter to everyone loudly, ew, that's not OK and I agree with that what goes around comes around part. I very much believe in that.
Just a question which came to my mind, Are you sure your female friend is saying all the truth? Probably yes but just checking.
I have to say all the pain you got and is sure because people are so mean sometimes and you have a case of that but still I blame it to your virginity. I remember the time when I was virgin and I was very much like you. More sensitive and easy to trust people. I got hurt by one guy back then but that didn't last long because there were several months between I realized I was gay and I had first sex.
I don't know how it sounds for you but I guess once you are not virgin anymore you'll change very much. Not that you'll become heartless and cold person but for example you'll never tell about your personal life and your family relations to the guy like Chris.

[Kyle]

Oops, I read your first post and didn't pay attention it was a week ago. Now I read two more pages and glad to know you are not trying to become mean.
Recover fast from your surgery, all the best.

[Jay]

Hello guys. First of all I would like to say thank you to everyone for your thoughts, prayers and supports. I appreciate everything very much.

Besides my parents, colleagues and close friends, I received constant companionship from Dfiant and Rainbowmum via text messages day and night.

4th December 2011

I reached the surgery ward with my parents and sister at around 2.30 pm. I was asked to come to the hospital before 3 pm as the surgeons and nurses would like to get me ready early for tomorrow's surgery.

I felt awkward at first as I've never been admitted into a hospital before. But that feeling didn't last as a doctor and few other nurses kept cracking a lot of smiles, jokes and supports.

The doctor introduced himself. "I'm one of your surgeon's 'under links'."

"So did you get a gastric bypass to lose such amount of weight?" He asked.

Gastric bypass surgery makes the stomach smaller and causes food to bypass part of the small intestine. Majority of obese patients choose this surgery to lose weight as it is considered to be a quick fix to obesity.

"No, I didn't. I lost weight through the old method." I answered him.

"Old method?"

"I changed my lifestyle and dietary. I did brisk walk, run and dancing. I also climbed my office building's emergency staircase from ground floor to the 30th floor every day. It took me 5 years to lose weight but I did it"

The doctor and few nurses were pleasantly surprised.

"You should have joined The Biggest Loser. You could have win." One of the nurses chirped in.

My left arm was then poked with a sharp needle and bloods were taken for several tests.

I was then led by a nurse to my bed. My bed was located at the end of the ward. So I had more privacy.

I wasn't allowed to eat after 12 am and for the whole day on 5th Dec.

5th December 2011

I was waken up by a nurse very early. I think it was around 6 am. She asked me to change into a green surgery gown and last thing I know, I was on a medical stretcher pushed by a male hospital staff heading to a surgery room.

My parents and sister followed from behind.

Before I was transferred into a surgery room, I was placed in a queuing room. The queuing room accommodates all patients who are waiting for their surgeries. Just like me, the other patients were also on medical stretchers.

Only surgeons and nurses are allowed to be in that room. The room was noisy and really cold. i covered myself under a blanket as I was freezing.

On my left was a kid. He was accompanied by his father (Exception case as the patient was a kid). He calmed his kid by crooning a song. On my right was an older man. We smiled at each other.

"What are you here for, young man?" He asked.

"Belt lipectomy, sir. I lost a huge amount of weight and now I need to fix my abdomen." I replied. "Why are you here, sir?"

"Heart surgery." He smiled.

Both of them were taken to their surgery rooms afterward.

"What if I die during the surgery?" I asked myself quietly whilst staring at the room's ceiling. "I think I'll be okay. At least I have accomplished most of the challenges in weight loss. I've made my mark."

I was neither scared nor nervous. But tears did stroll down my cheek. I cried because I know that this surgery will open up a new chapter in my life.

"Hello there. Are you here for belt lipectomy?" A male surgeon with a very familiar accent approached my stretcher.

He checked my medical record and then asked me with countless of questions. Are you a smoker? Have you had any operation before? Do you have any allergic. Etc.

That accent. I know that accent. "Doc, are you from Indonesia?"

"Yes. I am. How did you know?"

"I was born in Indonesia!" I grinned.

"Really? Which part of Indonesia? How long did you live in Indonesia?" He asked whilst slowly pushing my stretcher exiting the queuing room.

"Jakarta. I lived in a street called Tebet. I lived there for 7 years with the rest of my family."

"Ah...good, good."

The Indonesian surgeon was later joined by a nurse.

The surgery room does not resemble to the surgery room in ER or Grey's Anatomy TV series at all. It didn't look cramp, clunky and busy. The surgical room was a large sized room covered in all white. But it was minimalist and spacious. There were around 4 nurses plus the Indonesian surgeon at the time.

"Okay Jay, your main surgeon will arrive shortly. Meanwhile, I want you to breathe via the oxygen mask. Slowly breathe in and breathe out" A female nurse said to me whilst gently placing an oxygen mask on me.

Last thing I remember, another nurse injected something into my left arm and I passed out.

Successful Surgery

The surgery was successful. It finished at around 7 pm.

I woke up at around 8 pm and was surrounded by a few surgeons, nurses, dad and mom.

"Your surgeons removed 1.5 kg amount of fat and skin." My dad said. He raised a a big transparent bag containing red gooey stuff in front of me.

I was still kind of drowsy but alerted with my surrounding. "I want to take a photo ... I want to take a photo ... where's my Iphone ..." I blurted.

My mom handed over my Iphone. I snapped one. Then another one. And another one.

"Okay your mom and I are going home now. Your surgeons wanted us to bury this stuff in our garden."

"Wait!!! I want to hold it! I want to hold it!" I heard few faint laughs around me. But I wasn't sure who laughed. My dad held the plastic bag in front of me whilst I touched, grabbed and squeezed the hell out of the transparent plastic bag.

"Can we make leather bag out of my own skin...?" I asked my mom.

"Don't be silly ..." My mom replied.

I went back to sleep afterward.

6th December 2011



My bed on the last day

Below was the text message that I sent to all of my colleagues, close friends, Dfiant and Rainbowmum.

Hello everyone. Jay here. It's 2.33 am. The surgery went well. Started at around 8 am and finished around 7 pm. The surgeons basically sliced off my entire waist from front to back.

Ive been lying on my bed since 7 pm. Not allowed to move my body, not allowed to eat and drink. Feels weak right now.

Surgeon said I lost quite a lot blood during the surgery. They also had to remove fats from my waist. 1.5 kg of fat. They placed it in a plastic bag and gave it to my parents. Surgeons asked to bury it. I took a photo of it of course.

Surgeons are supplying me with painkiller called Morphine. I can use it in every 5 min. But so far I haven't used it. It doesn't hurt much.

My left hand is attached to a tube for painkiller. Two tubes are inserted into my waist/abdomen to drain out excess liquid.

I can't sleep cause I've slept the whole day.

Wasn't scared and nervous when about to have the surgery. But I had bit tears in my eyes before the surgery as I know this surgery going to change my life forever into a better one.

I'm not allowed to run and do weightlifting for 6 weeks.

I have my iPhone with me now as I've done the surgery.

I wasn't in pain at all after the post surgery. I didn't use painkiller that was provided. My surgeons and nurses were shocked. I was too.

What made the whole post surgery so uncomfortable was the tubes. I had tube on my right arm, left arm, two tubes on my abdomen and one tube connected to my penis. Basically I was not able to move and I was asked not to.

It was boring too. Thankfully I received constant text messages from Dfiant and Rainbowmum.

7th - 10th December 2011



My last meal in the hospital

By 7th, I was already allowed to walk. But I had to carry two tubes connected to vacuum plastic bottles containing my dirty old blood.

The tube that was connected to my penis was pulled out few minutes before I strutted around the surgery ward. It was ... there are no words to describe the experience and pain. It stung and hit you like a lightning. Peeing wasn't pretty and easy either. It bled at first.

Due to my surprising speed recovery, my main surgeon allowed me to go home on last Saturday. The last two tubes were removed on my last day in the hospital. I was ready to scream whatsoever but it didn't hurt.

"You know, you don't look like someone who just have had a major surgery. You look so normal. Walking around here and there." Another surgeon said to me before I left the hospital.

During my stay in the hospital, I was approached by the head surgeon of the surgery department. He heard about my achievement. He asked how I lost my weight and all.

"We told the other obese patients about you. Jay, I would like you to consider coming to our hospital once in a year to give a motivational talk to the obese patients."

I can't believe what I just heard. If he was serious, I'm game. But maybe he just said that to lighten up my day. But I managed to pass my business card to him on my last day. He visited me three times.

Closing



Self photo on my last in the hospital

This surgery was the first but definitely not the last. I was supposed to have two more surgeries on 2012. But my main surgeon decided to make a change to the plan.

He wants to do the 2nd and 3rd surgeries at one shot on March/April 2o12. I have to discuss about this with my boss and my parents. It should also depend on how my body responds to the first surgery.

Before my family and I left the hospital, I took the opportunity to thank each surgeon, nurse and staff of the surgery ward personally. That was the least thing I can do. My parents left two huge boxes of donuts with a thank you card on the surgery ward's counter.

I'm not allowed to run, do stairs climbing and heavy weight lifting for six weeks. Sucks but I'll find a way to do exercise.

Oh by the way, I have to wear a corset for minimum six weeks.

Last but not least, I would like to say thanks to my parents, my colleagues, close friends and GS members who have sent their prayers, thoughts and encouraging words to me. Special thanks to Rainbowmum and of course, Dfiant.

P/S: Y'know my surgeon asked if I'll be okay to have a lot of scars on my body due to the first surgery and upcoming surgeries. "I'll survive." I smiled to him. If a guy can't accept me due to the scars on my body, well he can kiss my butt. I don't care. I treat these scars like tattoos. My scars are signs of me being a badass.