The Church of England is poised to make a historic change to its stance on same-sex marriage, with decisions promised in the next two years.

Same-sex marriage is legal in all parts of the UK, with the Marriage (Same Sex Couples) Act coming into force in 2014.

However, England’s national church doesn’t permit or bless same-sex marriages, only allowing for civil partnerships, with some more conservative figures still strictly ‘obeying scripture’. Gay clergy are allowed to be in relationships, however they must remain celibate.



The church recently published a ‘suite of learning resources’, The Guardian reports, aimed at educating members on the ‘nature of humanity, of relationships’ via a 480-page book, numerous films and podcasts in addition to several other publications.

The Bishop of Coventry, the Right Reverend Christopher Cocksworth, oversaw the ‘Living in Love and Faith’ project. He told Sight Magazine, ‘There are some who feel this doctrine of marriage is ripe for development.’

He continued:

We have a lot to learn about life, we have a lot to learn about relationships. We have a lot to learn about love. We have a lot to learn about sex.

But I hope that other churches, whether they are more… liberal churches than the Church of England [and] those that are, let’s say more conservative, and are not even prepared to discuss these questions, that they won’t say ‘you shouldn’t be doing this at all’.

The Archbishops of Canterbury and York, Justin Welby and Stephen Cottrell respectively, also wrote in a foreword they were sorry for the ‘hurt and unnecessary suffering’ caused by the church. It reads, ‘For such acts, each of us, and the church collectively, should be deeply ashamed and repentant.’



The church has also announced a working group to be chaired by the Bishop of London, Sarah Mullally, with a focus on finding ‘a way forward… in relation to human identity, sexuality, relationships and marriage’. According to the MailOnline, ‘a timely conclusion’ will be reached in 2022, ‘which would then be put before Synod’.

Jayne Ozanne, a notable campaigner for LGBTQ+ rights in the church, who’s also part of the UK government’s LGBT Advisory Panel, said while the publication of these resources is an important step, the church ‘must not excuse or legitimise homophobia in any form’.

Ryan on the right with Billy Porter

The day after entertainment powerhouse Ryan Murphy attended his junior prom, his parents took him to see a psychiatrist to “cure” him of his homosexuality. The man responsible for Glee, Pose, and Ratched made the revelation in an interview with The Hollywood Reporter.

“I went to my junior prom and the next day my parents took me to a psychiatrist to cure me,” the 54-year-old Murphy said.

Luckily for Murphy and generations of future fans, his psychiatrist was far more informed about human sexuality than Murphy’s parents were at the time. After “several sessions,” the doctor spoke privately with Murphy’s parents and gave them a choice. They could try to change their son and lose him in the process, or they could “accept him and love him” instead.

“Thankfully, I had a really good shrink,” he explained.

His parents made the right choice eventually, but their acceptance came slowly.

“I was very blessed,” Murphy continued. “When I went to my senior prom, I had been through that but I still took a girlfriend because I wasn’t allowed to come in with my fellow.”

Murphy made the revelations while publicizing his latest movie, The Prom, which drops December 11 on Netflix and stars Merryl Streep and Nicole Kidman. The adaptation of Matthew Sklar’s 2018 hit Broadway musical of the same name is his latest effort for the streamer this year, adding to hits Hollywood and Ratched. Some of his other credits include Glee, Pose, the 2006 Running With Scissors, and the 2014 adaptation of Larry Kramer’s play The Normal Heart.

While Murphy’s own psychiatric experiences weren’t as unpleasant as those depicted in Ratched, they nonetheless were emotional and he has used the memory to inspire and connect with others.

“I know the feeling of being humiliated for your sexual preference. I know the feeling of thinking that you have no allies, and then it turns out you do,” he observed. He later added “if only I would have had this feeling of acceptance and belonging, how different my life would have been.

Nevada has become the first US state to protect gay marriage in its constitution.

By a two-thirds majority, voters passed a ballot to remove a provision in Nevada's constitution stating only marriage between a man and a woman could be recognised by the state.

The provision had not been enforceable since 2015 when the US Supreme Court ruled in favour of same-sex marriage, making it a right across the entire country.

Nevada's removal of the provision from the state constitution means that same-sex marriage rights would be protected in the Silver State even if federal law were to change in the future.

“I am just so elated that Nevada is the first state to take that stand and my community has taken that stand,” Nevada resident Lyric Burt told the Reno Gazette Journal.

“Because we’ve voted red for so long in a lot of presidential elections, it got this reputation for being a really conservative state. But there are some things in our state that show that we are progressive.”

Despite the 2015 Supreme Court ruling, 30 states still had provisions against gay marriage written in their constitutions before election day.

In 2002, voters in Nevada passed a ballot defining marriage as only between a man and a woman. The provision had been fought through the years by Nevada's LGBT+ community and allies and in 2014 the US Circuit Court of Appeals struck down the ban.

Now, with the wording removed from the constitution, Nevada's LGBT+ community is in high spirits.

“If you look in terms of LGBTQ policy right now, Nevada is kind of a rock star … In 20 years the climate of the state has totally shifted,” YeVonne Allen, a local LGBT+ activist, told the Reno Gazette Journal.

"Nevada has led the way in the nation on LGBTQ+ protections, and yesterday’s passage of Ballot Question 2 is yet another big step forward and important protection now afforded LGBTQ+ Nevadans,” Andre Wade, director of Silver State Equality, said in a statement.

“Silver State Equality applauds Nevadans who voted overwhelmingly to amend the state’s constitution to recognise all marriages, regardless of gender, by removing the phrase ‘only a marriage between a male and a female person shall be recognised and given effect in this state’ and instead, enshrine the principles of marriage equality to which all Nevadans are entitled and deserve.”

Election anxiety? Try a comforting gay flick to soothe your soul!

There are plenty of options when it comes to movies to keep us company and distract us from reality. The list assembled here comprises of the equivalent of comfort food—gay films we love to watch again and again that put us in a good mood, rather like old friends. These are not necessarily the the “best” movies, flicks that challenge us artistically or intellectually and gobble up festival honors. Instead, they warm our hearts by reminding us of the beauty of same love, community and pride.

Check out or revisit these gay flicks for a little comfort, and some warm & fuzzy feelings…

The Broken Hearts Club


Before he produced superhero TV, Greg Berlanti (Arrow, Supergirl) tried his hand at writing and directing an indie film. The result, The Broken Hearts Club, became a latter-day classic of gay cinema, a love letter to the surrogate family of the LGBTQ community. These days it plays like a shocking who’s-who of stars on the rise: Justin Theroux, Zach Braff, and Timothy Olyphant all have early roles, as does Dean Cain before he became a Trump surrogate and spokesman for dermal filler. John Mahoney steals his scenes as an aging gay restaurateur, and becomes the emotional center of a film as tender as it is funny.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube & VUDU


The Adventures of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert


For a dragtastic good time, check out this gem from Oz about three cross dressers in the Australian outback. The film helped launch the stateside careers of Guy Pierce and Hugo Weaving, and reminded the world of the considerable talents of the great Terrence Stamp. With Oscar-winning costumes that have to be seen to be believed, and one of the most fabulous soundtracks to ever grace the screen, Priscilla, Queen of the Desert affirms the family-like glories of gay camaraderie. Even the most stoic viewers will get in touch with their inner drag queens, thanks to the sharp dialogue and irresistible music.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube & VUDU.


Trick


Two gay guys do their best to hook up in this romantic farce, and along the way, they realize something curious: they actually like one another. Christian Campbell (Neve’s brother) and John Paul Pitoc play said horny dudes, though the real joy of the movie comes from (of all people) Tori Spelling as Campbell’s ditzy friend. Who would have thought that the actress could actually steal all of her scenes as a wannabe Broadway actress? Likewise, noted drag performer Coco Peru gives a memorable performance as one of Pitoc’s one night stands. Trick’s premise is hardly original, nor are its characters. Yet, as a charming portrait of boy-on-boy romance, the movie succeeds and will no doubt leave a smile on the face of a gay audience.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube & VUDU.


Latter Days


The closeted Mormon sexual fantasy has far surpassed cliché in recent years. In fact, thanks to the Church of Latter-Day Saints’ role in the passage of California Prop. 8 and other anti-LGBT legislation, anything Mormon grates more than fascinates (ok, Book of Mormon notwithstanding). Latter Days came out in 2004, and memorializes the last moment when gay culture found Mormon culture fascinating. As written and directed by C. Jay Cox, Latter Days chronicles a flamboyant Los Angeles gay falling for his closeted Mormon neighbor. Much like several other films listed here though, the romantic leads get upstaged by the eccentric supporting characters, and a supporting cast that includes Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Amber Benson, Mary Kay Place and Jacqueline Bisset. Though ostensibly a comedy, Latter Days does feature some disturbing scenes of conversion therapy, suggesting that if made today, the film would veer more toward the dramatic. In that sense, the film has a certain innocence about it, making it a charming, if naïve meditation on coming out and first love.

Streams on Amazon & Dekkoo.


GBF


If a mass hit like Mean Girls hinted at the dynamic between cliquish teen women and their gay besties, GBF indulges the idea, and becomes a hilarious answer to hetero-elitism. Part of director Darren Stein’s ongoing fascination with teen girls (his film Jawbreaker covered similar ground), GBF follows the rivalry between two young, gay high schoolers, one out and the other closeted. While their semi-feud provides plenty of laughs, GBF has a darker undercurrent—one highlighting the hypocrisy of straight women who want gay friends, but refuse to acknowledge gay relationships or homophobia. Even with the film’s serious edge, GBF keeps the humor coming, making it as familiar and comforting as other high school/gay interest movies like Mean Girls or Clueless.

Streams on Amazon, Hulu, YouTube, VUDU and iTunes.


Shared Rooms


A gay answer to holiday relationship movies like Love, Actually or The Family Stone, Shared Rooms follows a trio of gay couples all in various states of commitment over the week between Christmas and New Year’s Eve. A fresh-faced cast lends credence to what amounts to a meditation on love and family as a hook-up turns serious, a roommate arrangement masks hidden feelings, and a happy married couple takes in a young, gay ward. The unrated movie also features plenty of nudity from its very attractive cast, including the full frontal variety (actors Justin Xavier and Alexander Neil Smith might actually spend more of the movie’s runtime showing off the full Monty rather than dressed). Rather than titillate though, the nude scenes add a layer of honesty to the story, somehow making the characters all the more believable. The film’s one misstep lays in the film’s adoptive subplot: at times half of the married couple seems a bit too excited to have an adoptive gay teen, to the point it borders on creepy. Still, Shared Rooms has a great deal of charm, and some heartwarming scenes of a gay surrogate family becoming a real one.

Streams on Amazon, Tubi, YouTube & VUDU.


Boy Culture


Q. Alan Brocka directed this adaptation of Matthew Rettenmund’s novel about a hooker with a heart of gold. Boy Culture doesn’t play like the gay version of Pretty Woman, however. In fact, it smashes the Cinderella nonsense of that film precisely by introducing a set of realistic characters, led by X. As played by Derek Magyar, X makes no apology for his questionable line of work. On the contrary, he seems to feel more shame for being part of a love triangle with his two hottie roommates, Andrew and Gregory. With a multi-racial cast and a melancholy backdrop of Seattle, Boy Culture unfolds less as a gay film about sex than a thoughtful drama about finding love in an oversexed world. For a gay audience, Boy Culture surpasses the fairytale silliness of most romantic comedies—gay or straight themed—with believable characters and some real introspection.

Streams on Amazon, Dekkoo and iTunes.


Billy’s Hollywood Screen Kiss


Sean Hayes burst onto the indie scene just prior to his tenure on Will & Grace with this gay romance. Hayes plays Billy, a Los Angeles photographer who falls for one of his models named Gabriel. But is Gabriel gay? Billy spends most of Billy’s Hollywood Screen Kiss trying to realize the issue isn’t Gabriel’s sexuality—it’s if he’s attracted to Billy personally. The premise does wear thin over the film’s 92 minute runtime, though Hayes gives such a winning performance, he buoy’s the film when its shortcomings should sink it. Billy’s Hollywood Screen Kiss belongs to that trend of late 90’s-early 2000’s indie films more preoccupied with gay characters being gay rather than telling an interesting story. At the same time, sometimes a gay audience just needs a movie that understands the life of LGBT folk, and in that sense, the film comforts, even when it wears thin.

Available on Amazon and DVD.


Lazy Eye


Writer-director Tim Kirkman examines the One That Got Away in Lazy Eye, a film that postures as a love story. Loaded with sharp, naturalistic dialogue and featuring two fine performances from Lucas Near-Verbrugghe & Aaron Costa Ganis, the story centers on two middle-aged men rekindling a long-ago romance. As the film unfolds, it begins to reveal its true subject. Lazy Eye is less about lost love than nostalgia for youth, confronting past idealism and ultimately, growing up. In that way, the film could easily work as a sequel to one of those “I’ll never forget that summer” coming of age films. Ganis and Near-Verbrugghe have a magnetic chemistry, and like Shared Rooms, Lazy Eye features a good deal of nudity and graphic sex, though not in a pornographic way. Rather, the film has a voyeuristic quality which adds to the underlying feeling of realism. Gabe Mayhan’s photography captures the majestic beauty of the desert on par with the most glorious images of Lawrence of Arabia, and if the movie leaves a bittersweet taste, it feels like a comfort rather than revulsion. The two leads find something even better than closure—they find themselves.

Streams on Amazon, Kanopy, VUDU & YouTube.


The Wedding Banquet


Before Ang Lee raised the bar on gay films with Brokeback Mountain, the director helmed this heartwarming tale about a gay Chinese man reconciling his traditional family with his American gay life. For lead character Wai-Tung, that means marrying a traditional Chinese woman with the titular traditional Chinese ceremony, even while he keeps his longtime boyfriend Simon at home. The Wedding Banquet succeeds thanks to a perfect blend of drama and comedy, an appealing cast, and Lee’s astute direction. In the end, the movie isn’t so much about being gay or being Chinese as it is about balancing family expectations, and becoming a fully-formed adult. Years ahead of its time, The Wedding Banquet remains an overlooked classic of gay cinema, and a comforting one at that.

Streams on Amazon, VUDU & YouTube.


Love, Simon


The fact that Love, Simon–a mainstream rom-com about a gay teenager–even exists fills our hearts with joy. The movie itself, for that matter, is pretty heartwarming too, thanks to a great cast with awesome chemistry and sensitive direction by Greg Berlanti. Besides, we still can’t get enough of the scene-stealing Alexandra Shipp in full-on diva-in-waiting mode.The fact that Love, Simon–a mainstream rom-com about a gay teenager–even exists fills our hearts with joy. The movie itself, for that matter, is pretty heartwarming too, thanks to a great cast with awesome chemistry and sensitive direction by Greg Berlanti. Besides, we still can’t get enough of the scene-stealing Alexandra Shipp in full-on diva-in-waiting mode.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube, iTunes & VUDU.


To Wong Foo


Nothing says Americana like a cross-country road picture, and nothing says feel good like three drag queens played by three of the top action stars of their day. Still funny after 25 years, To Wong Foo has enough zingers, fabulous drag and just enough heart to make us sigh every time we see it.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube, VUDU and iTunes.


The Birdcage


Robin Williams, we miss you. Fortunately, Mr. Williams left behind one of his most hilarious performances (which says something) with this Mike Nichols comedy that also stars Nathan Lane, Oscar-winners Gene Hackman and Diane Weist, Callista Flockheart and Christine Baranski. Elaine May pens a script of stinging comedy, and one years ahead of its time: given that the central conflict, more or less, involves two men getting married (or palimony, which was close enough at the time), we find the movie delightful and heartwarming.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube, VUDU and iTunes.


The Perks of Being a Wallflower


This coming-of-age story flew under the radar back in 2012, which is a crime: it’s one of the best movies of that year, and one of the best in the genre. A mix of hilarity and stark drama, we particularly love the movie for the awesomely gay Patrick (played by the out-gay hunk Ezra Miller), and his subplot about being in love with a closeted fellow student. Bittersweet and tender, the movie makes us grab the tissues, but warms our hearts the way few other teen comedies can.

Streams on Amazon, YouTube, VUDU and iTunes.


Mean Girls


We know you’ve seen it–the seminal teen comedy of the 2000s, which helped launch the careers of Lindsay Lohan, Rachel McAdams, Amanda Seyfried and Daniel Franzese. Almost 15 years later, the movie still makes us laugh with its astute observations about teen girl culture, and the role the gay besties play in high school social structure. Watch it, and see how long it takes to refer to a clique of fellow gays as “Plastics.”

Streams on Amazon, YouTube, VUDU and iTunes.


Benjamin


From director Simon Amstell and featuring Colin Morgan of Merlin fame. The movie concerns a neurotic filmmaker who falls hard for a French rock singer, and their rather awkward attempts at dating. Still, both characters are so dang likable we can’t help but root for them to end up together. As evidence look no further than a quiet scene of the two sharing a bath, which amounts to one of the sexiest scenes in film in a very, very long time.

Streams on Amazon, iTunes, YouTube & Vudu.


Cousins


Cousins follows the mundane life of Lucas (Paulo Sousa), a slightly nerdy piano teacher living with his religious aunt. When Lucas’ distant cousin Mario (writer/director Thiago Cazado) returns from prison, sexual tension quickly mounts between the pair. Cousins has a somewhat ridiculous premise redeemed thanks to Cazado’s good humor and sincerity. The film makes Mario & Lucas’ love affair into the stuff of romantic fantasy, which makes us overlook the unlikeliness of it. The awkwardness between the pair also invites some very big laughs to the proceedings, and Cazado’s very explicit sex scenes don’t come off exploitive so much as a celebration of newfound sexuality.

Streams on Amazon and Dekkoo.

A new report by Public Health England shows that for the first time the number of new HIV diagnoses in gay and bisexual men outnumber new diagnoses in heterosexual adults by only 100 cases.

The number of gay and bisexual men (GBM) with newly diagnosed HIV fell to the lowest point in 20 years, according to a new report from Public Health England (PHE) published today.

The report shows there were 1,700 new HIV diagnoses in GBM in 2019 compared to 1,500 in 2000.

Overall, the number of people with a new HIV diagnoses fell by 10% (from 4,580 in 2018 to 4,139 in 2019). There was also a 34% decline from a peak of 6,312 new diagnoses in 2014.

There were 1,700 new HIV diagnoses in gay and bisexual men (GBM) in 2019 compared to around 1,600 cases in heterosexual adults. This is the lowest number of new HIV diagnoses in GBM since the year 2000 (1,500) and since 1998 in heterosexual adults (1,600).

HIV transmission in GBM has fallen by 80%; newly acquired HIV infections fell from an estimated peak of 2,700 cases in 2011 to an estimated 540 in 2019 (see background information).

While the proportion of people diagnosed late remained high at 42%, the overall number decreased from around 1,900 in 2015 to 1,300 in 2019. People diagnosed late in 2019 had an eight-fold risk of death compared to those diagnosed promptly.

The decline in HIV transmission in GBM can be directly linked to the increase in combination prevention, including:

the use of condoms

pre-exposure prophylaxis (PrEP)

frequent HIV testing in a wide range of settings

starting antiretroviral therapy (ART) as soon as possible after diagnosis

Treatment is now so effective that 97% of people receiving ART have undetectable levels of virus, which means it is impossible to pass the virus on, even if having sex without condoms. Undetectable = untransmittable (U=U).

HIV testing is vital for preventing HIV-related illness and death and to achieve the goal of ending HIV transmission in the UK by 2030. The UK continues to meet the United Nations Programme on HIV and AIDS (UNAIDS) 90-90-90 targets for the third consecutive year – however, there are opportunities to improve uptake of testing and support those testing positive to continue their treatment.

Almost 300,000 people declined to have an HIV test when they attended a specialist sexual health service. Black African heterosexual women attendees were more likely to decline a test than Black African heterosexual men (20% versus 9% declined testing) but less likely than heterosexual women and men overall (25% versus 13%). More focused conversations on HIV, testing, prevention and treatment in schools and clinical settings can help to combat high rates of declined tests.

By comparison, only 4% of GBM attending specialist sexual health services declined an HIV test – this is the group in which greatest declines in HIV transmission have been achieved.

Dr Valerie Delpech, Head of HIV Surveillance at PHE, said:

In the UK, we have made great progress towards eliminating HIV transmission by 2030. Frequent HIV testing, the offer of PrEP among those most at risk of HIV, together with prompt treatment among those diagnosed, remain key to ending HIV transmission by 2030.

Further progress can only be achieved if we also address the inequalities in reducing HIV transmission that exist around sexuality, ethnicity and geography.

The most common way of getting HIV in the UK is through sex with a person who is unaware of their HIV infection.

You can protect yourself from HIV by consistent and correct condom use with new and casual partners, by using PrEP, or if your partner is on treatment and is undetectable if they are living with HIV. Correct and consistent condom use will also stop you getting or transmitting other sexually transmitted diseases (STIs).

People can get tested through free tests available from sexual health clinics, GP surgeries, as well as through a self-sampling service or by using a self-testing kit.

Background information
Those at risk of HIV and STIs can still access services through sexual health clinics during the COVID-19 pandemic. Many clinics offer online testing, which means people can order tests using clinic websites, take them in the privacy of their own home, return by post and receive results via text, phone call or post.

New HIV diagnoses reflect diagnoses that occurred within a year. Since people can live with HIV for many years without being aware of their HIV infection, trends in diagnoses do not necessarily reflect trends in newly acquired infections. We use models to estimate newly acquired infections (infections acquired recently) for gay and bisexual men only.

Gay couples race to wed over fears for future of same-sex marriage

As the Supreme Court tilts further right following the confirmation of Justice Amy Coney Barrett, some LGBTQ Americans are worried about the future of same-sex marriage.  A number of couples are taking matters into their own hands and rushing to the altar for fear of this recently won right being chipped away at or even reversed.

A week after the Senate Judiciary Committee voted to recommend Barrett, Pastor Tori Jameson organized a series of wedding ceremonies outside St. Louis City Hall.


“I was really feeling upset about the nomination — she’s dangerous for LGBTQ people; she’s made it clear she wants to roll back our rights,” Jameson, who runs Lot’s Wife Trans and Queer Chaplaincy, said of the high court’s newest justice.

During her confirmation hearings, Barrett indicated that if there was a challenge to Obergefell v Hodges, the 2015 case that brought federal recognition of same-sex marriage, it’s likely that lower courts “would shut such a lawsuit down” before it made it to the Supreme Court.

But she has previously defended Chief Justice John Roberts’ dissent in Obergefell that same-sex marriage should be decided by the states.


https://www.nbcnews.com/feature/nbc-out/...e-n1245134

Gay footballer calls for 'collaborative effort' to help players come out

Matt Morton, player-manager for ninth-tier Thetford Town FC in Norfolk, opened up about his sexuality in 2019.

He said he had "nothing but a positive reaction" despite preparing himself for "abuse from opposing fans or players".

This month marked 30 years since Justin Fashanu became the first professional to talk openly about being gay.

Mr Morton, from Bury St Edmunds, said he realised he was gay in January 2018, at the age of 30.

He said he went from accepting it, to slowly telling friends and family, and eventually making it public in 2019.
The defender said although he had his own "different worries and concerns" about coming out, he had been supported by everyone around him.




https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-norfolk-54748410

The hidden truth I'm ready to face at last... I'm gay: Stanley Baxter, 94, bravely tells all about the sexuality he still wrestles with and the guilt he feels about wife who took her life.

Stanley Baxter is one of the most successful entertainers of his generation and for many years had his own Bafta-winning TV series.

He was married for 46 years, but beneath his cheerful exterior lies a man tortured by the fact he is gay.

In this remarkable new authorised biography, which Stanley originally refused to have published before his death — for fear of being judged — journalist Brian Beacom reveals the secrecy and sadness that have haunted the entertainer all his life.


Stanley Baxter (pictured) was married for 46 years, but he reveals in his new autobiography beneath his cheerful exterior lies a man tortured by the fact he is gay

The most outrageously funny man on British television 50 years ago was Stanley Baxter. His sketch shows were months in the making and the talk of the nation — spectacular, controversial, unlike anything ever seen.

Baxter staged full-scale MGM musicals and played every role. He could sing, dance, deliver broad panto comedy and perform pinsharp impressions of any star, male or female.

His act was so daring that he was probably the first TV comedian to impersonate the Queen. With silk gloves up to his armpits and a tiara, he announced himself as the Duchess of Brendagh and delivered a Christmas message that talked of the Queen Mum as a priceless antique.

Millions were scandalised — and breathless with laughter. In a television era rich with comic talent, from Morecambe and Wise to Tommy Cooper, Dick Emery to Mike Yarwood, everyone agreed Stanley Baxter was king.

What none but his closest friends realised was that Baxter was desperately unhappy, his personal life a battlefield. He lived in dread of being exposed in the press as a gay man.

His wife Moira, from whom he was separated, was tormented by mental illness and had attempted suicide by cutting her wrists in the bath. Baxter himself often spoke of wanting to die.

Today aged 94, he lives as he has for 25 years — a virtual recluse at his flat in Highgate Village, North London. For decades he has hated to venture out: 'I didn't want to be seen as someone who was once Stanley Baxter,' he says.

The showbiz world is rife with tales of heartbreak, loneliness, wasted talent and regrets. Of all those stories, it is hard to imagine anything more sad than this one.

He first asked me to write his biography more than 20 years ago, but was emphatic that he did not want it to appear while he was alive. Baxter would tell the whole truth, on condition that it remained a secret. Even though Moira was dead from an overdose by this time, he was sickened at the thought that his sexuality might become common knowledge.

When his friend Kenneth Williams's diaries were published posthumously in the early Nineties, he fought a legal battle to ensure nothing about his sex life was printed. By 1999, he was fearful that an unauthorised biography might be commissioned against his wishes. To pre-empt that, he agreed to let me tell his story . . . but not to publish it. 'I'm too afraid of what people will think of me,' he said. 'I got into this business to be loved. I don't wish that to stop.'


Stanley and Moira (left and right) on their honeymoon in London in 1952. They were married for 46 years

This year, he changed his mind. He's willing to let the world decide for itself. But it would be wrong to imagine he has found peace. 'There are many gay people these days who are fairly comfortable with their sexuality,' he says. 'I'm not. I never wanted to be gay. I still don't. Anyone would be insane to choose to live such a very difficult life.' He adds, his voice dark: 'The truth is, I don't really want to be me.'

Stanley Baxter was a star on the Glasgow talent circuit aged six, in 1932. Dressed in a sailor suit, his hair tonged in waves, he did impersonations of Laurel and Hardy, and Mae West.

As his mother Bessie, a blacksmith's daughter, accompanied him on the piano, the boy belted out saucy music hall numbers with titles such as I'm One Of The Lads Of Valencia: 'You can't beat a Spaniard for kissing, Oh ladies, just think what you're missing!' He loved the applause — 'a hundred people shouting 'Bravo' and I'm beating the adults to the prizes'. But more than that, he feared his fiercely ambitious mother. 'She probably felt if she praised me I'd try less hard. I began to be scared someone else would do better than me on stage, and my mother would clatter me.'

Since he was a toddler, Bessie had taken him to vaudeville shows. She called him her Sonny Boy and, as his precocious talent emerged, had him perform at every family gathering.

As he grew up, she was intensely jealous and would shoo away any girls who admired him: 'She started telling me about these two boys who once took a wee girl into a haunted house up the road and did terrible things to her. And they were birched! Beaten with sticks.'

His family remained in Glasgow during the Blitz at first, a teenage Stanley and his mother sheltering under a dining table during the bombing. Later, they decamped to an island outside the city.

In 1944, his call-up papers arrived. Too short-sighted for active Army service, he was afraid of being assigned to the merchant navy and the Atlantic convoys, but instead he was ordered to report to the coal pits, as a 'Bevin Boy' — one of the conscripted mine workers.

By then, he had fallen in love for the first time. He says now that he'd known for years that he found men more attractive than women, because at the Saturday morning cinema club he could not take his eyes off the half-naked Johnny Weissmuller as Tarzan, rather than Maureen O'Sullivan's Jane.

But he did not understand what he was feeling till he met Bill Henry, a schoolmate with blond hair and a taste for intellectual books. Bill had girlfriends, but he spent almost all his spare time at the Baxter house, sitting in Stanley's bedroom and talking till the small hours about art and philosophy, 'until we fell asleep, exhausted'.


Stanley Baxter as the Pantomime Dame in "Jack and the Beanstalk" at the King's Theatre, Glasgow. January 1977: Talented Stanley could sing, dance, deliver broad panto comedy and perform pinsharp impressions of any star, male or female

'I was in love with Bill,' Stanley says, 'but he certainly wasn't in love with me. He probably knew the way I felt about him. Although we'd spend lots of time in each other's beds, nothing happened.'

Until, inevitably, it did. 'It was like a 3,000 volt electric current going through me. In that moment, I thought the world had changed. Afterwards, I gasped, 'Have you done this before?' And he said dismissively, 'Oh yes, I've had all my friends'.'

For Bill this was just sexual experimentation, and he would later reject a sexual relationship with Stanley, preferring women. He died aged just 26 and Stanley was heartbroken.

After the war in Europe was over, in June 1945, a 19-year-old Baxter was told to report to the Seaforth Highlanders regiment. He was sent to India, and then further East to Burma, where he was promoted to corporal and assigned duties as a typist (Class 3). There, he saw a notice appealing for performers to join the Combined Services Entertainment unit [CSE]. 'If you can sing, dance, play a musical instrument or whatever,' the announcement read, 'please apply'.

Auditions were in Singapore and, after arriving there in December 1946 by flying boat, he was taken under the wing of a stooped, grey-haired man with a dusty moustache and a strident, nasal voice.

It was the future Carry On star Kenneth Williams, also barely out of his teens but playing an old man in a CSE production. He took an immediate shine to Baxter.

'He just liked the look of me, I guess,' Baxter says, 'which wasn't always the way with Kenny and people. We became close, without it ever being more than friendship.'

It was in CSE that Baxter met openly gay men for the first time. Instead of gaining the confidence to join them, he shied away, repelled by the high camp — 'all chiffon hankies and make-up and flouncing about. I thought, I really hate this. I don't want to be involved in this kind of world'.

Baxter resolved to repress his sexuality when he returned to Glasgow two years later — to live, as he put it, 'as a straight actor'.

He joined the Citizen's Theatre Company in the Gorbals, an idealistic group performing Ibsen and Shaw to working-class audiences. And he met Moira Robertson, a 22-year-old who had worked her way up from the wardrobe department to the stage.

Chic, with hooded eyes, Moira could have been Bette Davis's younger sister. 'I liked her,' Baxter says. 'I admired how fashionable she looked. She was far more bohemian than me.' They became lovers. 'It was partly a feeling of, 'I'll show them,' he admits. 'I could be as heterosexual as the rest of them.'

She was in love with him — and Baxter believed he was falling in love with her. He told Kenneth Williams as much. 'Silly boy,' the actor noted pithily in his diary.

On December 23, 1950, Williams made another note in his diary: 'Stanley wrote to say he is going to marry Moira.'

Beset with doubts, he confessed to Moira that all his previous affairs had been with men. Her reaction was dramatic. Rushing to the window of their second storey flat, she climbed out onto the ledge and shouted, 'If I can't have you then I won't settle for anyone else.'

To pacify her, Baxter promised they would marry, if she would consent to wait a year. 'It was real weakness on my part,' he says now. 'She guessed wrongly what being with a gay man entailed.'

What it did entail was years of loneliness, beginning on their honeymoon night. Overwhelmed by the knowledge that he was making a mistake that would ruin both their lives, Baxter sat on the wedding bed and sobbed.

He soon gave up any pretence of being faithful, or heterosexual. 'I couldn't put up with very long periods of not being with men,' he says frankly. 'Thankfully Moira was very understanding. If there were someone I were interested in, I could bring them home. And she was very good about letting them go to bed with me. She would go off to our bedroom and let me take the one opposite.'

They moved to London and Moira gave up the theatre, to be a housewife. Her husband's career blossomed, with a series of cinema roles that led to star billing in films such as The Fast Lady.

But fame made his clandestine life even more risky. In January 1962, he visited the public toilets in Madras Place, Holloway, hoping to pick up a man for casual sex. Instead, he was arrested.

The decriminalisation of gay sex between consenting adults was still five years away. Baxter was charged with soliciting for sex. 'I was going to top myself,' he says. 'I thought, 'My career will never survive this. And if I don't have a career, what do I have?' ' Friends suddenly shunned him, fearful of guilt by association.

His agent advised him to engage the celebrity barrister David Jacobs, who had recently won a libel case for Liberace when a newspaper implied the flamboyant entertainer was gay. Jacobs convinced the court that Baxter could not have been 'soliciting' when he was arrested because, apart from two policemen, there was no one else in the lavatories.

The charges were dropped, on condition that Baxter promised not to sue the police for wrongful arrest.

But even today he finds it difficult to discuss the case, referring to it as 'le scandale'. He was left with a terror of being held up to public shame.

At the same time, Moira's mental health deteriorated. She was desperate for a baby, something Baxter refused to contemplate. 'I didn't want to bring any child into the world who suffered what I suffered. A wee'un would surely have grown up with problems and taken drugs.'

He left for a theatre tour of Australia in a Brian Rix farce, leaving his wife behind. 'Anybody else would have gotten rid of me but she was devoted. Fixated,' he says.


Stanley Baxter as panto dame May 1985: Baxter was desperately unhappy, his personal life a battlefield as he constantly lived in dread of being exposed in the press as a gay man

When he returned, he decided to seek medical treatment for his sexual urges. Therapy proved useless: his psychiatrist, learning that he was married, advised him simply to return to his wife.

Instead, Baxter told Moira he could no longer live with her. In 1970, with The Stanley Baxter Show a huge BBC hit, he moved out of their house and took the apartment in Highgate Village that would be his refuge for the rest of his life. He relished the opportunity to live in pristine order, with a housekeeper to keep the place spotless.

He met Moira daily for lunch. She talked of killing herself, but he was shocked when a friend called round to find the front door wide open — and Moira in the bath, the water crimson with blood. She recovered in hospital and wrote to her husband, insisting, 'I'll never do something so foolish again.' But there was no chance of a reconciliation.

After switching to ITV with the promise of a colossal budget for The Stanley Baxter Picture Show, he met a 28-year-old German accountant named Marcus. Baxter was 46, and thought their two-day fling would be no more than a brief encounter.

'Marcus took me completely by surprise. Something was happening between us but I didn't wish to acknowledge the fact. He kept phoning all the time, telling me there was something special between us. I didn't want to know, but gradually I was falling in love.'

Moira's behaviour became more alarming. She visited the LWT studios while her husband's show was recording, and danced in the lobby when she was not allowed onto the stage. She danced too in the gardens in Highgate Village, naked.

'She told me she was hearing voices,' Baxter says. 'She would think the television was talking to her.' A psychiatrist diagnosed schizophrenia, but she refused to take medication.

There were few people he could tell of his worries. Certainly not Kenneth Williams: 'I remember sitting with him in an Italian restaurant, and telling him that I was very low. I explained a great part of the problem was Moira. I told him of how she was slipping into little overdoses, and I would be going round to see her and reviving her. 'And suddenly Kenny cut in, 'Yes! Yes! You're not much fun any more. A bit boring! Very boring!' '

Marcus was a constant support. But Baxter's anxieties were channelled into his work, and his perfectionist instincts became overwhelming. Stanley Baxter specials became vanishingly rare: one at Christmas 1976, the next at Easter 1979. Exasperated, his ITV television bosses told him they could no longer afford his extravaganzas.

He returned to the BBC but, after a one-off in 1986 in which he played 37 roles (including Mae West, whom he first impersonated aged six), that contract also ended. He went on to star in a children's series called Mr Majeika, about a schoolteacher who is actually a wizard.

But rejection and the stress of his double life had chewed away his confidence. Baxter began to turn work down — not playing Captain Hook in a production of Peter Pan opposite Lulu, not appearing with Cannon and Ball at the Palladium. 'I turned down too many parts . . . almost as often as a chambermaid turns down bed sheets.'

A dreadful fantasy played in his head, that he would suffer a heart attack backstage during panto season and be found dead on the floor of the dressing room.

Instead, he withdrew from the showbiz world. His relationship with Marcus deepened and continued until the younger man died of lung cancer four years ago, though the two never lived together.

He saw Moira frequently, but the fractured marriage was always difficult. In 1997, he decided to spend a month at the villa they owned in Cyprus. She wanted to come, too. Feeling she was too ill to travel, Baxter told her she must stay in London. He took her passport, to prevent her from trying to follow him.

'It was then she physically attacked me. She punched me and my glasses flew off. It was the one and only time she had ever reacted in this way. But immediately afterwards she was so sorry.'

Later that week, Marcus visited her — they got on well — and found her nursing a dying pigeon by the fire. It had been run over in the street. 'One wounded bird helping to look after another,' Stanley said.

When he called her from the airport, on his return to the UK several weeks later, she didn't answer. Anxious, he took a taxi to the house. The front door was open. Moira was dead on her bed from an overdose. She was 69 years old.

He had always felt guilty for marrying her. He felt guilty for the many affairs and the new partners. He felt guilty when he moved out, unable to share a home with her any longer.

And now he felt incredibly guilty because at the very end, he wasn't there — to do what? Say sorry? Say goodbye? Or just give her the only thing she had ever asked for — to be with him.

The Real Stanley Baxter by Brian Beacom is published by Luath Press Ltd, £17.60 hard-cover or £10.09 Kindle Edition...
https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1910022055

Well it was kinda inevitable given the numbers... a month-long lockdown from Thursday, Boris Johnson has announced.

Until 2 December, people in England will only be allowed to leave their homes for specific reasons, such as education, work or food shopping.

Straight young men on the app are posting suggestive videos with their buddies. It’s not just about the views.


Foster Van Lear, a 16-year-old TikTok personality from Atlanta, has posted videos of himself kissing guy friends on the cheek. “Everyone is fluid and so men have become less hesitant about physical stuff,” he said.

Connor Robinson, a 17-year-old British TikTok star with rosy cheeks and a budding six-pack, has built a large following by keeping his fans thirsty. Between the daily drip of shirtless dance routines and skits about his floppy hair, Mr. Robinson posts sexually suggestive curve balls that, he said, “break some barriers.”

In an eight-second video set to a lewd hip-hop track by the Weeknd, he and a fellow teenage boy, Elijah Finney, who calls himself Elijah Elliot, filmed themselves in a London hotel room, grinding against each other as if they’re about to engage in a passionate make-out session. The video ends with Mr. Robinson pushed against the tiled wall.

But as racy as the video is, fans are under no pretense that the two are in the throes of gay puppy love. Mr. Robinson and Mr. Finney identify as heterosexual, but as some TikTok influencers have discovered, man-on-man action is a surefire way to generate traffic. Uploaded in February, the video has gotten more than 2.2 million views and 31,000 comments (lots of fire and heart emojis).

“Normally, I do jokey dance videos and stuff like that, but it seems like things have kind of changed now,” Mr. Robinson said from his bedroom in Cumbria, England, which is painted forest green to stand out on TikTok. He estimates that 90 percent of his nearly one million followers are female. “Girls are attracted to two attractive guy TikTokers with massive followings showing a sexual side with each other,” he said.


Connor Robinson, left, a British TikTok star, posted this racy video with Elijah Elliot on his feed in February.

Gay and bi-curious male followers are welcome, too. “If watching my videos makes you happy and stuff, that’s cool,” he added.

As devotees of TikTok’s young male stars know, Mr. Robinson’s hotel seduction video is veering toward becoming a modern-day cliché. The youth-oriented social media platform is rife with videos showing ostensibly heterosexual young men spooning in cuddle-puddle formation, cruising each other on the street while walking with their girlfriends, sharing a bed, going in for a kiss, admiring each other’s chiseled physiques and engaging in countless other homoerotic situations served up for humor and, ultimately, views.

Feigning gay as a form of clickbait is not limited to small-fry TikTok creators trying to grow their audience. Just look at the hard-partying Sway Boys, who made national headlines this summer for throwing raucous get-togethers at their 7,800-square-foot Bel Air estate in violation of Los Angeles’s coronavirus guidelines.

Scrolling through the TikTok feeds of the group’s physically buff members can feel as if you’re witnessing what would happen if the boys of Tiger Beat spent an uninhibited summer in Fire Island Pines. There is a barrage of sweaty half-naked workouts, penis jokes, playful kisses and lollipop sharing.


The TikTok star Josh Richards, 18, left, has posted several videos with his so-called boyfriends.

Josh Richards, 18, one of the group’s breakout stars, has posted videos of himself dropping his towel in front of his “boyfriends” Jaden Hossler and Bryce Hall; pretending to lock lips with another buddy, Anthony Reeves; and giving his roommate, Griffin Johnson, a peck on the forehead for the amusement of his 22 million followers.

It certainly hasn’t hurt his brand. In May, Mr. Richards announced he was leaving the Sway Boys and joining one of TikTok’s rival apps, Triller, as its chief strategy officer. He also hosts two new popular podcasts — “The Rundown” with Noah Beck and “BFFs” with Dave Portnoy, the founder of Barstool Sports — and is the first recording artist signed to TalentX Records, a label formed by Warner Records and TalentX Entertainment, a social media agency.

“These boys feel like a sign of the times,” said Mel Ottenberg, the creative director of Interview magazine, which featured some of the Sway Boys in their underwear for its September issue. “There doesn’t seem to be any fear about, ‘If I’m too close to my friend in this picture, are people going to think I am gay?’ They’re too hot and young to be bothered with any of that.”

Fun to Be ‘Gay’

As recently as a decade ago, an intimate touch between two young men might have spelled social suicide. But for Gen Z, who grew up in a time when same-sex marriage was never illegal, being called “gay” is not the insult it once was.

Young men on TikTok feel free to push the envelope of homosocial behavior “because they’ve emerged in an era of declining cultural homophobia, even if they don’t recognize it as such,” said Eric Anderson, a professor of masculinity studies at the University of Winchester in England.

By embracing a “softer” side of manliness, they are rebelling against what Mr. Anderson called “the anti-gay, anti-feminine model attributed to the youth cultures of previous generations.”

Mark McCormack, a sociologist at the University of Roehampton in London who studies the sexual behavior of young men, thinks that declining homophobia is only one aspect. He believes that many of these TikTok influencers are not having fun at the expense of queer identity. Rather, they are parodying the notion that “someone would even be uncomfortable with them toying with the idea of being gay at all.”

In other words, pretending to be gay is a form of adolescent rebellion and nonconformity, a way for these young straight men to broadcast how their generation is different from their parents’, or even millennials before them.



Foster Van Lear, a 16-year-old high school student from Atlanta with 500,000 followers, said videos showing him kissing a guy on the cheek or confessing feelings for his “bro” make him look cool and dialled-in.

“In the new generation everyone is fluid and so men have become less hesitant about physical stuff or showing emotions,” he said. “It would seem ridiculous if you were not OK with it.”

As a matter of fact, his father has called his videos “really weird” and “gay.” His mother was also taken aback by his public displays of affection with male friends, but now appreciates the pressure that high school boys are under to stand out.

“If you are just straight-up straight now, it’s not very interesting to these kids,” said his mother, Virginia Van Lear, 50, a general contractor. “If you are straight, you want to throw something out there that makes people go, ‘But, he is, right?’ It’s more individual and captures your attention.”


Mr. Van Lear said that his videos make him look cool. “If you are just straight-up straight now, it’s not very interesting to these kids,” his mother, Virginia Van Lear, said.

Parents are not the only ones perplexed; these videos confound some older gay men, too.

Ms. Van Lear said that one of her gay male friends came across a TikTok video in which her son joked about a man crush and told her: “You know, if Foster ever wants to talk to me if he’s gay …” She had a good laugh. “People of my generation don’t get these boys are straight,” she said. “It’s a whole new world out there.”

Meet the ‘Homiesexuals’

But there’s no confusion among the mostly teenage fans who can’t seem to get enough of these gay-for-views videos.

Whenever Mr. Robinson posts videos of himself getting physical with another male friend, he is deluged with feverish comments like “Am I the only one who thought that was hot”; “I dropped my phone”; “OMG, like I can’t stop watching.”

Ercan Boyraz, the head of influencer management at Yoke Network, a social media marketing agency in London, said that the vast majority of the commenters are female. And rather than feeling threatened or confused by guys who are being playful with other guys, they find it sexy.

“Straight guys have always been attracted to girls being flirtatious with each other,” said Mr. Boyraz, who has worked with Mr. Robinson. “Girls are just taking the same idea and switching it around.”

Call it equal opportunity objectification.

@aaronsee_

 

@clayboywheels